


My Heart is Yours

by TiredEnergyBall



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Freeform AU, Gen, LexIsNotABadGuy, Light Smut, Other, SuperCorp, SupercorpEndgame, Supergirl au, littleangst, no superpowers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:08:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 84,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24916624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TiredEnergyBall/pseuds/TiredEnergyBall
Summary: Lex seemed uneasy, and that was not always a good sign. But he seemed to relax as she gathered his thoughts and spoke.“You know that Andrea’s heart was donated to someone right?”Lena froze. Yes, she did. But she never knew who and where. She never bothered to because she wouldn’t really know how to react knowing her heart was out there somewhere. That although she died, her heart lived. She just gave Lex a nod while sipping her wine.“I found her. The person who got Andrea’s heart.” Lex said in a low voice.OrThe one where Lena meets Kara during the most hurtful time of her life. And what's with the heart? Who has it?
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 145
Kudos: 392





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys, 
> 
> This is funny because I have another story that I'm not done writing it but this one just popped into my mind and I can't stop until I write this down. I hope y'all like this one. And check out my other works. 
> 
> I fully intend on finishing all my stories. Not sure if this is a long one or a short story but as long as it's SuperCorp Endgame right?
> 
> 'Ciao!

Lena couldn’t believe that this was happening.

She was supposed to be in a wedding. It was supposed to be her wedding and it was supposed to be a happy event. In a garden, filled with the beautiful flowers and crowded by the few people that she considers as family.

Not like this. 

Standing in a grassy field, soaked wet from the rain. Her brother beside her.

Crying.

Broken.

Lost.

Dead inside.

\---

_“Babe, you said no conferences before our wedding day. You promised.” Lena whined like a child._

_“I know I did. And I remember me saying that I won’t be in any conference on the week of our wedding date. So, I’m technically not breaking my promise here.” Andrea chuckled placing her clothes on the bag._

_“I know. But I just want you here. Not 4905.79 miles away.” She said easily._

_“Did you really just calculate the distance from here to Europe?”_

_“I did not, it’s common knowledge you know.” She pouted._

_“Nerd.” Andrea teased. “I love you, you know that right?” She added._

_“Of course, I do. And I love you too. Can’t wait to be with you.” Lena answered._

_“You can’t wait to annoy me is what you really want to say.”_

_“Yeah, that too.” She smiled and was glad that Andrea was feeling the same way for her. After all these years that they have been together._

_Andrea leaned in and kissed Lena sending Lena to a moment thinking like it was the last kiss they’d share._

_Little did she know that it was real._

_It was their last kiss._

_\----_

Nothing.

Nothing was making sense to her. She was supposed to be married not attending her fiancés funeral. She loved her, Andrea. She was her best friend, her sister, her mentor, her world, her everything. She was the love of her life. She doesn’t want the idea of being away from her even for just a while. But right now, she couldn’t stand being near her. Not near her once lovely body, now lifeless.

Her once blue eyes that stared into Lena’s soul, were never to be seen again. Those eyes that she once loved, are no longer there. Won’t be able to look at her and know what the problem was, what she was thinking about. Those eyes that seemed to talk to her, just talk by just looking.

They are close forever.

Gone.

The once strong body that she adored and loved, was finally being brought down to the ground. And it was at this moment that she knew, Lena knew, that she was also being buried with her. And no one can save her.

_Plock_

_Plock_

_Plock_

_Plock_

All she hears is raindrops. Silence. And her tears begin to roll down. She couldn’t be here. She can’t be here. So, she ran. She ran as fast as she could. She couldn’t care less if she was seen crying. _Luthor’s don’t cry._ Darn. She didn’t care if she was seen weak right now by the few people that are here. She needed to be weak. Luthor name be damned.

She just wanted to be away. So, that she did.

\---

“Lena.” He called out.

Silence. There was just silence.

“Lena, please. I know you’re hurting. But please let me in.” He pleaded.

Silence again. This time, it was chilling. He was desperate and he didn’t know what to do, so he walked away. But he came back after a few minutes.

_Click._

Lena propped her head up from her bed and saw her brother walk inside. She wasn’t ready for this. This wasn’t the right time. Stupid Lex just wouldn’t leave her alone.

“Lena.” Lex said as he sat at the edge of her bed. He didn’t want to come close. He knew that his sister wasn’t ready and he didn’t want to push her. Lena felt that. Lex was always attentive of her, ever since they were young.

She started to feel tears in her eyes again. But this time, she tried to stop them. She was tired of crying, exhausted and terribly done with herself. She gave her brother a quick glance and she gave him a weak smile.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Lex managed to say as he came closer, feeling that it was safe. Lena doesn’t protest and lets her brother come near her. And he lies down next to her. Arms cross and not touching her, she was still hurt and he didn’t want to make any move to be kicked out again. _Again._

“I can’t do this Lex.” Her tears betrayed her. She was a mess. “It just won’t stop. The pain just won’t go away.” She said as she gave up all her power and cried and hugged her brother.

She felt lost and she felt alone. Nothing was working for her. She then felt her brother cooing her in and hugging her tight, rubbing her back and making her relax. He was always like this, he always made sure that Lena was safe and taken care of. And for a moment, Lena felt good. Having Lex with her, there _again._ She wasn’t alone this time. She had him.

“I know, but I’m back. And I’ll be here for you. Every step of the way. I’m not going away anymore. Let’s forget about the past.” He halted. He knew that he was saying two different things at the same time. Lena glanced at him and took her eyes away.

“I know you’re still hurting, Lena.” He added. “I am too. Its not easy, and I won’t ever blame you for what you’re feeling right now.” He inhales and continues. “But you have to start moving on. It hurts, but you have too. We’re still here for you. I’m here for you. I won’t leave again. I promise.” The last word in sort of a whisper. “We lost her already, I don’t want to lose you too.”

“I know.” She whispered as tears still fall on her face. Dampening her brother’s clothes. “But I think I need more time.”

“Take all the time you need, but please don’t shut us out. It’s been almost half a year. And I’m worried that something might happen to you. I’ve been there. That path, I don’t want you to lose yourself. Not you, you’re supposed to be the sane one in this family.” He said intending for the last line to lighten up the mood. Which he was glad he used because he heard small chuckles from his sister.

“I just want you to feel alive again. Love yourself. I’m sure that’s what she would have wanted.” He added.

Lena gave her brother a slight nod. And that was enough. An assurance that she will try. At least she would. And with that, Lex gave her one last squeeze before kissing her hair and stood up.

He glanced at her one last time.

“You can do this Lena, I know you can.”

And with that, he left and closed the door.

_I can do this. I’m Lena Luthor. There is nothing that I can do._

\---

It was a start for her.

See, she did do it. She was doing it and she was proud of it. Lena Luthor has come to her sense and walked back to her usual self. Her professional aura was gleaming and it has been almost a year after that dreadful incident. She misses her everyday but she was sure that she can do this and she can be better moving forward. Now that her brother was back, and she was supported by most people that have complete faith in her. Which are only a few by the way.

She was back to business. Making sure that sad misogynistic assholes would find their place after threatening her. Making sure that this time, nothing would really break her. Not even love, because she knew, Lena knew that Andrea would be the last person she loves and there would be no one else.

“Welcome back, sis.” Lex walked towards her giving her a quick hug.

“Hi, Lex. Glad to be home.” She answered sweetly.

“How was Paris?”

“It’s fine. Everything is sorted there.” She smiled and took a seat at her brother’s office chair. “It has been 5 months of pure horror and convincing and trouble shooting but LCorp Paris is doing much more better now.”

“Of course, it would. You went there and made sure that everything would be handled. Not that I’m not glad you’re back, what are you exactly doing here in National City?” Her brother asked.

“Well, as much as I loved Paris, it wasn’t home. I don’t think it would ever be.”

Lex looked at her and came close and tapped her shoulder. “I’m just glad you’re back and you look much more better from before. This is your home, and I’m glad you’re here. I couldn’t even run this place ever since you rebranded it.” He laughs.

And this actually makes Lena smile, she was happy that Lex was here helping her out.

Surely, after Lex’s stupid actions from years ago that made the company run in shambles, she needed to make sure that she saved the company, after all it was entrusted to her by her brother. Who was then doing illegal drugs. But Lex, true to his word this changed his ways. And she was glad that he was back and not wasting money on drug dens and using drugs himself. He has been clear for 2 years now and Lena has never been so happy for him.

“I had to make sure that you can’t get your hands back in just incase you want to throw a drug party.” She answered and they both laughed. It was painful to hear, but it was a good thing that they can laugh about it now.

No, Lena was not alone anymore.

“Are you finally coming back for good now?” She knew that Lex was nervous. And he needed assurance that she was totally good already to come back.

“Yes, I am. And don’t worry. You are still the CFO and Sam is here to help you. I know it’s rough Lex, but you can do this too. Gain the trust of the board. I trust you. You can do this.” She encouraged him.

“That’s all that matters to me. As long you trust me, then I know that I can do this.”

“That you can.” They stood up and gave each other a hug. “I better be going.” Lena continued. “I need to drop by at CatCo. Need to make sure that things are getting better there. You know, ever since…” She trailed off and Lex understood. However, he had a look that seems he’s holding back something from Lena. And Lena can tell, he’s brother was very obvious.

“Are you okay, Lex?”

“Yes, I am. You should go ahead. I’m glad you can go back there. I’m sure you’ll want to check there. Sam has been lovely and very great with managing the company.”

“I know, that’s why I trust you both. I best be going. Let’s have dinner soon.” She said and exited Lex’s office.

“Jess, tell Morgan that I’ll be dropping by at CatCo.” Lena told her ever loyal assistant.

Jess just looked at her with a look of _are you sure Ms. Luthor_ kind of look. And she just gave her assistant a sincere smile.

“Yes, Jess. I need to go there. Check on things.” Her assistant, with pure concern on her face just gave her a nod.

“Yes, Ms. Luthor, I’m on it.” She said as she hurriedly walked.

“Jess, wait.” Lena called her.

“Yes, Ms. Luthor?” She glanced back at her boss, phone on her hand.

“Thank you… for staying with me.” She said.

Jess, for the love of her pure heart just gave her boss a sweet smile and walked towards Lena.

“Ms. Luthor, I know that sometimes you feel you’re not enough. But I want you to know that I am here for you too. I will never leave your side. I am loyal to a fault.”

“I know. And how many times do I need to tell you to call me, Lena?” She raised her eyebrow, one that she does oh so magnificently.

“Erm, of course. I will do my best to get used to that Ms. Lu – Erm, Lena.” She smiled awkwardly.

\---

“Lena, are you good with walking alone upstairs? I need to take a call to schedule a conference for next week.” Jess said to her boss as they went out of the car. Infront of the building that Lena once seen to be an escape from all her stress and fears.

“Of course, go ahead. I’ll just go straight upstairs and chat with Sam. Tell me when you’re done.” She smiled and walked inside.

It was bit of odd. Ever since Andrea died, she never wanted to step foot in this place. After all, Andrea worked here, and they shared profit in this place. This used to be a place of rest for her. Although they worked, they found time for each other here. Chatting and being silly.

She missed the days. Oh, god. How she missed them all.

Seeing the elevators brought her back to a time where she and Andrea would just make out until they reach the end of their destination. It was nostalgic and Lena didn’t know what to feel. She was fine, but she was here again and everything seemed to be back to her.

As she entered the elevator, she pressed her eyes together. She felt all the emotions in all the memories she had with her dead fiancé. How they would laugh and flirt and do _things_ in this exact elevator. Andrea makes sure that its sanitized daily. She remembered those blue eyes, perfect blue eyes that spoke love to her. She kept her eyes shut, afraid that if she opens them, it would break the spell she is in right now. And all she wanted to remember were those blue eyes.

Until.

“Wait! Hold the door!” Lena snapped her eyes open and saw a blonde girl running towards the elevator. She wasn’t able to stop the door from closing, however the woman was able to halt it using her arms. She was pretty breathing heavily, must be from the fast running earlier to make sure she meets the elevator in time. She was panting and her head hung down and Lena can’t quiet see her face but she was sure that the woman was breathing hard.

“Are you okay?” She asked, out of concern.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” The woman was still looking down and scrunched trying to gain some power from earlier. “Thanks for holding the door.” She continued.

Lena wasn’t sure what she was thanking for. She hardly did anything. And just as she was about to say another word, there she is and it seemed that the world had stopped for her and made a joke out of her. The woman stood straight, brushed her body out of the dust that wasn’t visible there as if it was a way to gain confidence and composure and looked at Lena.

And it was unfair because she never would have thought that this moment will come. That she will see those again. Or any of this kind. She didn’t know if it was a joke from her early daydreaming, because ladies and gentlemen, there she was again.

Drowning.

Seen.

.

.

.

.

.

.

By another set of blue eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lex smiled at her and glanced over the Lena’s back. Because he got up but she didn’t bother to look because she was doing some emails on her phone while Lex went to the girl and greeted her. When she turned, she saw Lex coming back but the girl just trailed behind him. She can’t see the girl yet because Lex was blocking her but the world just really has to make fun of her at times like this because, she’ll be damned. 
> 
> She sees blue eyes again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another one!

The blonde woman gave her a smile that seemed rather beaming for Lena’s own liking. And those eyes. Why does it have to be blue? She asked herself. She was kind of lost in the moment and didn’t actually hear the woman talking to her.

“I’m sorry?” She said.

The blonde chuckles. It was a good one. She liked the sound of it. “Sorry, I was just asking what floor are you headed to?”

Lena to her horror didn’t realize that she wasn’t able to press the floor number because.

  1. _She was day dreaming earlier. And she missed Andrea._
  2. _She was caught by the new set of blue eyes that caught her attention._



“Sorry. I’m headed to the penthouse.” She schooled her features. She rather not be seen as stupid. Not by a seemingly cute smiling lady _. Darn._

“Oh. Me too. Let me get us there then.” The other woman answered and gave her another beaming smile.

_Get it together, Lena._

There was an awkward silence as they went up. Well it was only awkward for Lena of course, because she was the one staring at the blonde for god knows how long. _Darn those eyes._

They were able to reach their destination and the door opened. The lady, Lena still didn’t knew her name. _Beam. Yes, she’ll settle for that name for now_ had made a gesture to have her go out first. Like a true gentleman that she is. She gave her a smile again and Lena couldn’t help but smile back.

“Thank you.” She said as she exited and walked straight towards the office. _Her_ office. Not her, but _her_. Which was currently occupied by one Samantha Arias. Looking back, Beam long gone from the scene made Lena a bit confused why she even looked back at the first place.

“Lena!” She heard someone calling out to her. It was loud and she knew who it was.

“Sam.” She went inside the office and gave her friend a hug. “Good to know that you haven’t changed.” She rolled her eyes lovingly.

“Oh, come on, they wouldn’t mind. I am getting paid to yell sometimes.” She quipped back. “God, I missed you. It was way to long. I’m glad you’re here.” Sam said and ushered them towards the sofa.

She missed her best friend too. Sam was there. Specifically, throughout everything that happened to her. And how she missed her and missed this.

“Yes. I’m staying back for good.”

“Is that real?” Sam said standing and looking as if she was about to cry. “I’m so glad you’re back!” She said and hugged Lena tighter this time.

“Me too. I’m glad.” She hugger her back, giving the equal amount of tight that Sam was giving her.

“I know we talk like most of the time, but how are you here? I mean, are you fine being here?” Sam asked her breaking the hug and holding her hand this time.

“I am. I’m better and I believe that yes, I may have moved on from the pain, it doesn’t mean that I have to move on from the happy memories.” She sighed. “You know, this place.” She gestured her hand towards the room. “…it’s just about happy memories. And I can’t be sad forever. She wouldn’t really wanted that. Just good memories, no more pain.”

“I’m so glad to hear that, babe.” Her best friend squeezed her hand, and looking at the ring on Lena’s hand. “I know you may still think about her sometimes, you are allowed too, okay? But you’re right. Leave the pain and take in all the happy memories. And the ring?”

“I still wear it. It just feels unfair if I don’t. We were supposed to be married. But then that happened and I couldn’t bear myself not to wear it. I want to believe that we were actually married, it makes it easier for me to feel that she was all and everything that I had and keep her that way.” She said tears escaped her face.

“I know, babe. I know.” Sam said pulling Lena closer to her. They were interrupted by a knock and door and good thing they weren’t facing it.

“Ms. Arias, Ms. Danvers is here. She said that you called for her?” Eve, Sam’s assistant said.

“Sure, let her in. Thanks, Eve.” And Eve left to get Ms. Danvers.

“So, I know you’re not only here to catch up. But for an interview. I invited on of my best writer and reporter to interview you and make an article about what your plans are since you are here and apparently, never leaving.” Sam said in a giddy way.

“I can do that. Just make sure that you send me someone worthy of my time. I am a Luthor and we want everything perfect.” She said mimicking her mother’s tone and they both laughed at the failed impersonation.

But every good laugh comes to a halt. Specially if it was halted by one smiling blonde with piercing blue eyes that stared back to her.

“Kara!” Sam forwarded and walked towards _Beam or Kara_.

“Hi, Sam. Glad to be back.” _Bea—Kara_ answered.

“How was Midvale?” Sam asked as she pulled Kara to sit on the opposite chair where they were seated. And Lena just can’t help but look at this beautiful person in front of her who is named _Kara_ for all her liking.

“It was great. Thanks for allowing me a quick visit back home. You know, family drama.” She said as she settled and sat in front of the two friends.

“Yeah, by the way. Kara, this is Lena. Lena Luthor my best friend and the CEO of this company and of LCorp.” She gestured to Lena. “And Lena, this is Kara Danvers. The best reporter that this city has ever had.”

Lena felt like ice was suddenly splashed all over her. She saw those piercing blue eyes again. _What was that? Why does it look like the ocean’s color?_

“Uhm. Hi, Ms. Luthor.” Kara said standing up and giving her hand to Lena for a shake.

“Nice meeting you Ms. Danvers.” She said and took the hand in front of her.

_What firm hands she have._

“So, you know this Kara and I know that I have briefed you about it already. But I have a better idea right now than what was discussed the last time.”

_Uh oh._

Lena glanced at her friend in horror. Whatever Sam was thinking would never be a good idea and that is for sure.

“We’ll still continue to do an interview with you.” She gestured to Lena. “But since you’re staying for good, how about we do it in a kind of a week with Ms. Luthor, yeah?” She glanced over at Lena. Lena for the better of her just glanced at Sam in look that can send Sam away packing but her friend wasn’t fazed. Not even a bit.

“Lena, I know you don’t like the idea of it. But it will be good publicity.” Sam reasoned. Glancing over to Kara to get some sort of support but ended up having an awkward blonde scratching the back of her neck.

“Okay, listen babe.” Sam faced her. “Think about this. You were hardly here for a year. And also, I know that you like privacy, we’ll keep that part. But it won’t hurt if we share a bit about yourself to the people so they would know that you are actually doing a good thing from the company even if it went to shambles with the whole Lex thing.” She said it casually.

Lena glared at Sam and that got her best friend to stop talking. She was sure that Sam would shut up now because that was a sore spot. She knew that Sam was just being helpful of the PR part but it was a touchy subject still.

“Ms. Danvers, can you give us a minute please?” Lena asked nicely.

“Sure. I’ll be at my desk if you need me.” She said and exited.

“Lena –”

“No.” She said firmly. “I know you’re trying to help Sam but I don’t like that idea. It’s like I’m being scanned by all of the people of we do it. I know that people don’t like me already after what happened with Lex but he’s getting better now and we both know that.”

Sam heaved out a breath and inhaled to level her calmness. They weren’t fighting. They were just having a conversation.

“I know. That’s why I want to do this for you.”

Lena raised her eyebrows.

“Look. If people will only see what you and Lex have been up to, they will be convinced that he’s changed too and will immensely help his development more. I know that you don’t the idea of being talked about but if people would be able to see a piece of how great and caring and loving you are, it will really help you too.”

“You don’t have to live feeling like you’re a Luthor failure. Because you’re not and we want the whole world to know that.” Sam continued. “It can also create a culture of trust and open information. We won’t really do the private things. Just work related and make sure that the best parts of you and your brother are highlighted.”

Lena thinks for a while.

Is that really possible? People to see that she’s a good Luthor?

That she and her brother were only victims of a good for nothing mother?

Her thinking was halted when Sam spoke again.

“And besides, Kara is really a great reporter. She never gives me trash and we can make sure that she’ll bring the Luthor name into the heights again.” She wags her eyebrows up and down.

“I don’t know Sam. I’ll think about it.”

“Sure. That’s all I’m asking. Think about it.”

\---

Lena, being the woman that she is really thought about it.

She was deep in her thinking, hard and focused that she was not sure if she doesn’t want the interview because she’s uncomfortable of being exposed to the public or if she’s afraid to be exposed to _Beam_ or Kara.

It was strange. Lena knew that she just felt that way because of the eyes and how blue they were. She felt exposed in a way that only Andrea made her feel before.

This was silly.

_This is silly._

She can manage that. It’s only a week and Sam’s right. It’s was time for the Luthor name be associated with good for once. And if Sam thinks that Ms. Danvers was the tool to make that happen then so be it.

“Sam?” She said over the phone.

_“Hey, you have your answer already?”_

“Yeah. I’ll do it.”

_“Cool! That’s great! I’m happy you agreed to it.”_

“Yeah. But I have a few rules about this.”

_“Go ahead. Give them to me and I’ll have it drafted for you.”_

“Well, just a few. First, we follow my schedule. I have a lot to do since I was gone for a long time so we stick to it and make sure that it will only cover work, advancement that we’re doing and some highlights about how we are managing this as a company.”

_“Sure. Already done. Anything else?”_

Lena pauses. Was there anything else? _Anyone?_

“Only Ms. Danvers gets to be with me. No body else.”

_“Sure. I’ll make note of that.” She hears Sam scribble something on her paper. “Consider it done.” She can practically hear Sam smiling. “And Lena –”_

“Yes?”

_“Thanks for agreeing to this. I know it’s tough. But you can do this.”_

“Sure.” Then she hangs up. Soon enough, she see’s another ring on her phone who happened to be Lex.

“Hey, what’s up? I just literally saw you earlier today.” She answered.

_“I don’t need to excuse to call my favorite sister.”_ He deadpanned.

“I’m your only sister.”

_“Yeah, fair point. But, that’s not the reason I called.”_

“Are you alright?”

_“I need to see you tonight for dinner. There is someone that I would like to introduce to you.”_

Lena rubs her temples. She wasn’t ready for this.

“Brother, when I said that I was fine I didn’t mean that I was ready to be in a relationship. I don’t plan on being in one. Not after that. Please don’t do this.” She said a bit agitated.

_“I’m not setting you up on a date. I know that, okay? I wouldn’t do that to you. It’s just that I really want you to meet this person. You might actually want to as well.”_

“I’m not sure Lex.” She sighed.

_“I promise its not what you think. You have to be here. You of all people should be there. Okay? I’ll let my driver pick you up at 7PM. Love you!”_ And then he hangs up.

Lena paced and made sure that she was calm. Whatever Lex was thinking, she will trust that her brother is not up to something bad. So, she does what Lex asks her to do. It’s just dinner and it’s done.

She made sure that she was fixed for the night. She went to the bathroom of her apartment and took a quick shower. She was until this moment using the same shampoo and soap that Andrea used. She wanted to smell her again and how she ached for another chance for her scent and her arms around her. And in these moments, she knew that she was still broken, that a part of her was buried with her. But she couldn’t do anything about it anymore. It was done, and she had to go forward, but yes. Keep the happy memories. That she will.

She dressed up nice and not really eye catchy. But she was a Luthor and she was sure that people would definitely look at her. She was wearing a black dress, knee length that showed her shoulders and her hair was down with a few curls.

She made sure her lipstick was spot on and her eyes were smoky. Just like how Andrea liked them.

The receptionist gave her a call saying that her service has arrived and she didn’t even notice the time.

Going down, she wasn’t sure why she was nervous. Lex was on dinner to. Was Lex introducing her to a new girlfriend finally? Or was it about the company? She was unsure. But whatever it is, she just has to get it over and done with.

The ride was a bit long and quiet and it was nice. A nice kind of quiet. As they reached the restaurant, she saw Lex waiting for her at the corner table. It was a nice Italian restaurant and Lex knows she loves Italian food.

“I’m glad you came.” Lex walked towards her and gave her a hug.

“I don’t really have a choice. Do I?” She joked as they sat down to their table.

“Sorry. But I just really wanted you to be here. This one is important and I know that you would want to know this too that’s why I called you.”

“Where is this person by the way?” Lena looked around.

“She’s not here yet but she will be any minute now.” He answered.

“Okay. So, while she’s not here. Why don’t you brief me about this little meeting if it’s that important?”

Lex seemed uneasy, and that was not always a good sign. But he seemed to relax as she gathered his thoughts and spoke.

“You know that Andrea’s heart was donated to someone right?”

Lena froze. Yes, she did. But she never knew who and where. She never bothered to because she wouldn’t really know how to react knowing her heart was out there somewhere. That although she died, her heart lived. She just gave Lex a nod while sipping her wine.

“I found her. The person who got Andrea’s heart.” Lex said in a low voice.

Lena stopped her sipping and look at her brother.

“Why would you do that?” She asked a bit irate.

“I wanted to because I wanted to see how Andrea saved another person’s life.” He said. “I know its unfair for you, that another got to live and she didn’t but, wouldn’t you want to know and see?”

Lex was right. Although she was hesitant, she still wanted to know that her heart was beating. That a part of her was still here. Maybe not with her, but she’s here. She just looked at Lex and made sure that he was agreed with when she gave him a small smile.

“Thank you, Lex. I know you’re doing this for me.” And yes, she knew he did. Because that was Lex. He was always like that.

“That’s why I want you to meet her. And she also wants to thank you and meet you. I hope you’re okay with it.”

“Where is she anyway? I’d be glad to meet her too. I hope she’s not a monster.” She jokes to bring the mood up.

Lex smiled at her and glanced over the Lena’s back. Because he got up but she didn’t bother to look because she was doing some emails on her phone while Lex went to the girl and greeted her. When she turned, she saw Lex coming back but the girl just trailed behind him. She can’t see the girl yet because Lex was blocking her but the world just really has to make fun of her at times like this because, she’ll be damned.

She sees blue eyes again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! 
> 
> I hope you tell me your thoughts. I have already a draft for the next chapters and I hope you all stay tuned :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena finds out that there is more to Kara Danvers than just being a reporter. They get to know each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thanks for the comments and encouragements. I hope I don't disappoint with this one. BTW, I'm not knowledgeable with medical stuff so I want to say sorry of there are medical terms not matching. I hope y'all understand. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

_What on earth is happening?_ She can’t help but to think that herself. If this was a joke then she couldn’t really handle it.

“Lena. This is Kara Danvers.” Lex broke her from her own thoughts. _Of course, she is._

Blue eyes were tearing up everything in her again. It was just this morning that it happened, and again tonight. When was she said she was doing fine and wanted to be better, this was not what she pictured. Not blue, and definitely not the idea that the love of her life’s heart was beating and is right in front of her.

“Ms. Luthor, we meet again.” Kara said smiling at her but it was like a timid smile. Like, she wasn’t expecting this at all like she was.

“Ms. Danvers.” She stood up and gave her dashing smile. One that she had mastered making, a business kind of smile but genuine all the more since Kara was like a breath of sunshine. She extender her hands for a shake which the blonde had quietly reciprocated. With a smile of course. _Beam._

“Oh, so you two know each other already?” Lex, _not forgotten of course_ , said questioningly.

So, the first realization for the night, Lina wasn’t meeting a girlfriend for Lex. Nope. It wasn’t also a date set up, thank goodness. And lastly, she was caught up in the moment, not realizing that she was still holding Kar—err, Ms. Danvers’ hand.

“Yes, surprisingly.” She took her hands away slowly. “Ms. Danvers works for CatCo. She is a reporter.”

“New reporter actually.” The blonde corrected, a _little_ too eager.

“Well that’s awesome! Let’s take our seats, shall we?” Lex offered.

The three of them sat down and truth be told, Lena didn’t really know how she was supposed to act right now. She was lost of words and she didn’t know how to start a conversation let alone be in one with the blonde in front of her, who was busy fixing her glasses in an adorable kind of way.

“Kara, thank you for joining us.” Lex broke the long silence. “I’m sure that this isn’t an easy meeting for you, the both of you, but I am glad you gave us the time.”

Kara, bless her gave Lex a polite smile and it was captivating with out any efforts. Lena thought it was a good starter. She made a mental note to thank Lex for being so sensitive of her feelings.

“No, actually, I really want to thank you. Uhm, both of you.” She glanced over to Lena. “Imagine my surprise when I got the call that someone was looking for me, and they knew who my new heart belonged to.” She shuffled on her seat. “I mean, I was looking for the donor but it was a year and I lost hope and then all of a sudden this happened. I wouldn’t really miss it for the world.”

“And I almost fell on my seat when I found out that it was actually Lex Luthor who reached out to me.” She laughed nervously. “I mean, of all the people, you were the ones closest to the person who actually saved my life.” She touched her chest. Gesturing to the sincere thanks that she is giving to them.

Lena was proud of Andrea of the moment. She was happy that although she was broken for a whole lot a year and her love had died, it was comforting to know that until the very end, Andrea still helped someone.

_Always trying to be the hero._ She smiled to herself.

They chatted for a while until Lex’s phone rang.

“Sorry, I have to take this. It’s from the lab.” He gestured. Lena gave him a smile and nod and he excused himself.

“So, uhm—err…” Kara shuffled and Lena was sure that the girl in front of her would faint anytime now.

“Ms. Danvers, are you alright?” She asked out of concern.

“Yes. I am, sorry. I’m just really nervous about tonight. To think that I just met you this morning, and now, I feel like my heart is beating a bit fast. It might have recognized you.” She stated.

Lena smiled and she felt light at the confession. It was a reminder for her, that although, scientifically not true, she was happy to absorb the feeling of Andrea’s heart recognizing and beating fast for her, just like how she was told before.

“And to be honest, I was actually hoping in all the stars and deities that when I found my donor’s family, that they wouldn’t hate me.” She stated sadly. Lena fixed her eyes on the blonde. She was not mad, she was sad, but she was never mad.

“I, uhm—I’m not mad. I can’t be even if I wanted to.” She assured her. “I want to thank you too. For taking care of her heart, Ms. Danvers.” She placed her hand over to Kara’s which she somehow regretted doing because when she did, it was her heart racing now. For no reason known to her, it was weird for her. There was something about how Kara was looking at her that made her heart race.

They were in a staring game. Hands still unmoving and comfortable silence. _Comfort_. Maybe that’s the reason. However, this was quickly forgotten the moment Lex came back.

“I’m sorry ladies, but I think I would need to go back to work. Something happened in the labs and I am needed.” He said apologetically.

“Let me come with you, I may be needed there too.” Lena said concerned.

“No. It’s all good. Let me handle this. You just came back. Stay a while and enjoy the night. I promise I’ll fix what’s wrong.” He assured her.

Lena had always trusted her brother. They had always been like this despite the circumstances of the past. She knew that she can rely on him.

“Okay, keep safe. Tell me if you need anything.”

“Yes.” He smiled and faced Kara. “I’m really sorry for this Ms. Danvers. I wish he had more time to chat. Maybe next time?”

“Yes. That would be lovely.” She smiled back at him.

Lex went ahead and gave them one last wave before exiting the halls.

“He’s always like that. Always making sure that he’s looking out after me.” Lena stated still looking at the glass door smiling.

“It’s great to see that you two have a great connection.” Kara stated. “Uhm, Ms. Luthor?” She looked at Lena.

“Yes?”

“I hope you don’t mind me asking. I may be a little bit invasive here and—that’s not what I—I just wanted to know if, uhm. I wouldn’t want you to think that I’m insensitive, gosh—“

“Ms. Danvers?” Lena shot her eyebrow up, not in an intimidating way, but in an adoringly way. A rambling Kara Danvers is something.

“Please, call me Kara. I feel like I’m a high school teacher.” Kara chuckled.

“And you can call me Lena. Please, what is your question?” She continued as she took a sip of her wine.

“How are you related to my donor?” She asked a bit hesitant if the tone is something that would give it away.

Lena choked from her drink at the question. Was Kara really not aware? Or was she just messing with her?

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that, that was really dumb of me.” She said as she stood up planning to go to Lena’s side, but Lena lifted her hands in a gesture saying that she was okay.

“No, its okay. Sorry, just—uhm, wrong pipe.” She reasoned. She chastised herself and when she was decent looking, _definitely not wet,_ she faced Kara.

“She’s my fiancé.” Lena said casually. As if it didn’t hurt her. “Andrea, that was her name.”

The look on Kara’s face was something close to awe and sadness. Like she wanted to run away from the information. Lena had only known her for a day, but she is certain that Kara was someone who wore her emotions on her sleeves.

“Don’t worry, Kara. You didn’t take her away from me.” Lena said sincerely. “I can hear you thinking.” She chuckled.

“Oh, sorry. I was just, uhm—I feel like that yes, but thank you for assuring me. I am more thankful than ever now that I know how important this must be for you too.” She said. Lowering her head and fixing her glasses.

“I’m happy to have met you, Kara. Under any kind of circumstance. But this is special for me and I am more than happy.” She answers.

“And I will make sure to take care of this heart.” Kara smiles back at her.

\---

It has been 2 weeks since her last encounter with Kara. And Lena was busier than ever. A week after she got back, she was dumped with much CEO work. Good thing that Sam was handling everything over at CatCo., and Lex was a big help. But still, she was swamped with many paper works. She heaved a sigh as her intercom from Jess’ beeped.

_“Ms. Luthor, you’re 3PM is here. Should I let them in?”_

She groaned out her exhaustion. One last meeting for the week. It’s Friday and she swore to god that she would sleep all Saturday, stocks be damned.

“Yes please. Thank you, Jess.”

She took her pile of papers on to her side and placed them nicely, and the closing of the door got her attention.

“Ms. Luthor, it’s nice to see you again.”

_Kara._

She totally forgot the fact that her supposedly meeting was with Kara.

“Kara!” She said a bit too high pitched. “Sorry, was a bit busy. Please sit down and please, call me Lena.”

“Sure, no problem.” Kara gave her a smile and took her seat on the chair opposite from hers.

“I have to be honest, I totally forgot that you were the last person I was going to meet today.” She chuckled at her own ridiculousness. Earlier _groaning_ moment from exhaustion forgotten.

“Oh no, it’s alright. It’s not like I sent a reminder. I don’t even have your number to do that.” _Pause._ “I mean, not like I was asking for your number—I mean how can I ask for your number that may come out as unprofes—I can actually hand you my business card. That’s much better than rambling. Shutting up now.”

Lena found it adorable. How Kara can make up 100 words in one breathing. This was the first time in a while that she really finds something so funny and adorable. It was refreshing.

“Well, you can have my number anytime. Here.” She handed her business card to Kara after taking the one from Kara’s.

“Thank you, that was really stupid of me.” She smiled nervously. “Okay, so yes, agenda!” She easily said.

“Yes, agenda.” Lena swayed her head in disbelief. Kara was a goof, but she was a ray of sunshine.

“So, we won’t be doing any interviews today. I mean, I’d just like to confirm your schedule for next week. So, we can cover the whole week as per Sam’s request. Actually, your friend Jess emailed me your schedule already, but I just wanted to confirm a few points to it. If that’s okay?”

“Sure, go ahead.”

They went over the list of the things that Lena would be doing and make sure that there was enough time to cover everything. Kara was very professional and was very confident when she was in her element. She was attentive and also sensitive to what Lena was comfortable and what she wasn’t.

“I think we covered mostly of it.” Kara said after almost an hour and a half doing a run down and making sure to get Lena’s input about it all.

“Yes, Thank you, Kara. It has been lovely.” Lena smiled satisfyingly.

“I better be going. Your day is ending and I’m sure you want to spend it in on piece.” The blonde stood up and gathered her things inside her purse.

Lena suddenly felt the need to stop Kara from leaving. She wasn’t sure what made it happen or why it happened but she blurted out the words even before she was able to think about it.

“Would you like to have dinner?”

_Oof._

“Sorry?” Kara asked. She was sure that she was heard and it was said clearly given the fact that Kara repeated what she said. “Dinn—you and me? Dinner?”

She was blushing hard for sure. And she was certain that Kara was seeing her face. There was no turning back now.

“Yes, I would love to have dinner with you. I’m sure you’re pretty hungry and we did a lot of to do lists. Perhaps reward ourselves with something to eat?” She said covering the embarrassment.

“Of course, that would be great!” Kara stated overly excited.

“Are you fancying over anything?”

“I am actually craving Chinese, is that okay?”

_Chinese? Interesting._

“That’s great. Give me a moment and then we can head out.” She answered Kara as she hovered over her things.

“Sure, let me wait for you outside. I need to call Sam too to tell her that it’s all sorted.” Kara gave her a small hand wave and proceeded outside of Lena’s office.

Fixing her purse and herself, she didn’t notice that her assistant Jess went inside of the office.

“You’re out early today, Lena?” Her assistant asked like she didn’t really believe what she was seeing.

“Jesus.” Lena jumped right out of her place when she heard Jess come right in.

“Nope. It’s Jess, but close enough.” Her assistant deadpanned.

“Very funny.” She rolled her eyes. “Yes, I am going home early. It’s a weekend. Let’s just push anything else on Monday and you can go home too.” _I hope nothing bad happens out if this, the last time I did this it wasn’t the best day._ She thought to herself. 

“Of course, I’ll have everything else pushed on Monday. Enjoy the weekend, _Ms. Luthor._ ” Jess quipped. A slight teasing tone with her name. The few days that she was back, she had missed these banters with her assistant and they had been closer than before.

“Get away, Jess. Go home.” She answered as she clutched her bag on her shoulder.

To her amusement, she was really uncertain herself what made her want to go home early. For the first time in a long time, she was able to go home _or_ go to dinner at a time where it was not later than 9PM. Since her break and operational travel to Paris, it felt odd to see the sun setting as she left her office sparing a glance at her balcony.

It was refreshing, but for what reason she can’t really say.

_Blue eyes._

It was what her brain was telling her. There was no way. She was certain that it really had nothing to do with the blonde reporter that was waiting for her at the lobby. It had nothing to do with the blue-eyed woman that she had spent a good amount of her afternoon.

Maybe it was because of the comforting idea that she was eating dinner with a person whose heart knew her. It was that. The comfort that came up with it and that brought her to the idea that she was also familiar with the peace that it brings. That was it. Just that. Period.

Walking over to the elevator, she remembered the first time that she had seen Kara. They didn’t meet there. Not there, but there was also a strange comfort that it gave her. She knew, she was fond of the reporter. She was charmed, and maybe it also had something to do with her eyes. They were calming. A different kind of blue that she was used to. If she wouldn’t be biased, she’d say that she liked Kara’s eyes more that she ever liked Andrea’s. But she was biased, so she dismissed the thought.

As the elevators opened, she was welcomed by a smile she had been happy to always see.

“Sorry if I took a while, I had to sort things upstairs.” She said as she approached Kara who was just standing smiling at her.

“No problem. I just got here to. I talked to Sam and advised her that we were sorted out for next weeks schedule.”

“Great. So, where is this Chinese place you want to eat?” She asked as she walked forward to Kara who was currently fixing her perfectly straight glasses.

“I wonder if you wanted to try Fei Wang’s? It’s just a few blocks away from here.” The blonde answered as they started walking towards the entrance.

“Sure, do you want us to drive there or would rather us walk if it’s only a few blocks?”

“We can walk, you know. Good for the heart.” Kara joked gesturing to her chest and she did give her an endearing smile.

“Yeah. You’re right. I need to sweat a bit too. It’s been an easy day, absolutely no sweat with all the meetings.”

Kara then just laughed at her quick comeback. Relieved that she was still able to pull out a joke and she didn’t want to admit but she found the laugh so captivating. Making a note to try and joke more often just to hear that smile. Not that she was invested into it. _No, she was not, thank you very much._

They chatted a while whilst walking and spent a good 10-minute walk towards the restaurant. When they arrived, Lena scanned the area. It was a well-lit place, cozy with a lot of Chinese lanterns but not to exaggerated about it. It was a good place and seemed to have their fair share of customers.

“This is my first time here. Although I do see it when I get to the office.” She told Kara.

“Well, I like this place. I actually love their pot stickers. Which happened to be my most favorite food in the whole world. Alongside pizza.” The blonde’s enthusiasm showing up as she talks about her favorite food.

“I actually never heard of it.” Lena admitted.

“Wha—Oh gosh, you never? As in like never even seen one or eaten one?” The look of horror was evident on the other woman’s face. As if it was crime for her. Instead of being offended, she found it rather funny. It’s like the food were part of Kara’s honor. If it was something, she would have been insulted. That her food knowledge was not enough, but this was quite funny for Lena.

She gave her nod to answer.

“Okay, I will make it my life mission to introduce you to them.” Kara said in complete seriousness. The crease on her eyebrows giving off the effect of being true to her word. “I’ll have you know that I take my pot stickers seriously. And I don’t share, but I’ll give you an exception.”

“I’d be honored. So please, introduce me to this delicacy that had your utmost attention and affection.” She answered with a slight teasing tone of challenge.

“Oh, I will.” Kara answered as if accepting the challenge given to her.

A few moments later, their orders had arrived. Kara being true to her word about loving pot stickers ordered two servings of their family edition, which were 12 pot sticker per serving. Lena could have not believed her eyes, how were they able to finish all of this if there was beef stew and a plate of chicken and broccoli and fried rice in front of them cooked the Chinese way.

“Are you sure you can finish all of these?” She asked as if needing reassurance from the person sitting opposite her.

“Yes. Well, I’ll have you known that even though I had a heart surgery, I can still finish all these and just burn the calories later.”

“So, you work out?” Lena asked. She really did not paid attention to it but she scanned Kara. She did seem like she was physically fit. She had toned arms. Like really toned arms, her grey cardigan clinging on her _nicely_ was to give way. _Those biceps are something._

She schooled her features realizing that she was eyeing the blonde.

“Yeah, I do. I was advised to. Specially with what happened. I needed to make sure that I was always fit to keep my body in shape and the heart healthy.”

“Were you not fit before?” She asked curiously.

Kara looked at her. Smiling with an amused smile. “Well, I was. I was always fit. Believe me.”

“I’m sorry but I don’t want to intrude, but what happened to you? Why the heart transplant if you were fit?” Lena looked at Kara whose expression changed into something like sadness but also a look of fondness.

“We don’t want to talk about it if you’re not comfortable. I’m sorry for intruding.” Lena said. She was really sad about Kara being uncomfortable around her. She wanted to know what happened, but maybe it was too early to know.

“No, it’s fine. I’d like to tell you. I feel like I kind’a owe you an explanation. Not that you’re demanding for it. It’s just, I have your fiancé’s heart. And I’d like for you to know why.” Kara answered her, no sound of disappointment on her voice.

“Kara, you don’t have to. You don’t owe me anything. We can just enjoy the food. It’s okay.”

Kara gave Lena a smile and a comfortable nod. Lena was relieved that Kara was not upset. They ate dinner and talked about something else. It was like the conversation earlier was forgotten. They enjoyed the time and finished.

Lena insisted on paying since she was the one who invited Kara for dinner. The blonde protested but relented the last moment when Lena flashed her Luthor look that made the blonde stop at her protests.

They stepped out of the restaurant and walked back to L-Corp where Lena’s driver will be picking her up. As they were walking, Lena stopped at her tracks when she heard Kara and saw that the blonde stopped at her tracks.

“I had congenital heart disease.” Kara said looking down the side walk and then glancing towards Lena. “That’s what happened to me.” She said as she walked towards Lena, resuming their halted stroll.

“Oh, darling. I’m sorry to hear about that.” Lena touched Kara’s arm as they walked earning a faint squeak from the blonde.

“No, you shouldn’t be. So yeah, that’s the reason. I was diagnosed 2 years ago. I wasn’t always aware of it. Like, who would have known?” Kara sighed. “I play soccer. Or used to, if that’s the right word for it. But one day while playing, I fainted and was rushed to the hospital, waking up it was the news that nearly crushed my world.”

Lena felt her heart ache at the thought of something bad happening to Kara. It wasn’t fair. Why did she have to experience that? She gave Kara a look that says she was alright, it was fine and she was safe.

“Funny thing is that, in some cases, congenital heart diseases can’t be seen until you get old. So that’s what happened to me.” She gave a faint smile to Lena. “I was getting better to be honest; I was advised that I was good and I just needed to stay safe and be healthy. Until one day, I was brought back to the hospital because of heart failure. I—I almost didn’t make it, but I was glad I was safe for a while.”

Lena was in awe. Kara was a fighter. She knew that. It was as if she cheated with death, even with just a new heart. She glanced at Kara squeezing her arm as a form of support saying that it was okay.

“Kara, it’s okay. You don’t have to tell me all of this. As I told you, you don’t owe me any explanation.” Lena assured her.

“I know, but I want you to know because this heart…” She touched her chest to where the heart was a glint of tear on her eyes, “it saved my life. And I want you to know how thankful I am for that.” Kara was sincere and Lena appreciated that Andrea’s heart was not taken for granted, so she let Kara continue.

“But all of a sudden, I was having a heart failure again, and I needed a heart transplant. And I needed it ASAP or else, I’ll die. I was given until the following day and the doctors where doing the best that they can. My sister for the most part, she was a surgeon at the hospital that I was taken.”

“I almost lost hope when all of a sudden, they ran towards my room and advised me that a new heart was ready for me.” She said beginning to be sad again and tears escaped her eyes. Lena saw Kara look at her as they stood in front of the L-Corp entrance. “The day, you lost her…” Kara shut her eyes and gave out a loud exhale. “Was the day that I got mine back.”

\---

**_September 16, 2017_ **

_“Jess, can you cancel everything I have today and push them back to Monday? Andrea’s coming back to town and I have to pick her up to the airport later. Can we do that?” She asked her assistant. She was a life saver, well at least for Lena._

_“Of course, Ms. Luthor. I’ll make sure of that. Please send my regards to Ms. Rojas.” She smiled at her boss._

_“Cut the formalities, Jess. Please. We’ve been through this.” She said rolling her eyes._

_“Sorry, I’m not really used to it.”_

_“Then you better be. I’ll head along.” She smiled and went outside._

_Her driver picked her up from the lobby and went straight home. She really missed Andrea and she wanted their place to be presentable once her fiancé comes home. When she stepped inside their penthouse, she made sure to cook Andrea’s favorite meal and cleaned the house. All the sheets from their bed was changed, the couch looked cozier and the room smelled fresher than ever._

_Next stop was to make sure that she looked presentable. Lena never meant to brag but her body was surely to die for. She had a great boobs and her figure was definitely one that can make heads turn, but there was something about how her fiancé looks at her that makes her feel that she’s the prettiest woman in the world._

_She went to the bathroom to take a bath. She made sure that her bubble bath was perfect before dipping. She took her time and then proceeded to fixing herself. Applying just the right amount of make-up, not too strong and not too soft, but she made sure she had smokey eyes. Andrea loved her smokey eye effect._

_She settled into a green sundress and comfortable heels because she was going to the airport and she didn’t want the hassle of standing too lon_ _g with her killer heels (that’s what her assistant calls it). The thrill of seeing Andrea again made her heart bubble and light. It was almost a week that they haven’t seen each other and to top it up, it was their wedding in no less than a week._

_She didn’t notice but it was a little over 4PM when she heard her phone ring and when she reached out to it, it was an unknown number. She was hesitant to answer so she ignored it and went ahead with her preparations. To her irritation, her phone rang again and it was the same number that had called her._

_“This is Lena Luthor.” She answered, not irritated but not happy all the same. Her facial expression changed upon talking to the person on the other line. She was not able to compose herself and all she heard was…_

_._

_._

_._

_“We’re sorry. We tried everything that we could.”_

_And then the line dropped._

\---

“I know that I have been saying thank you the whole time that I found out that about Andrea saving my life. But I just feel like I want to say sorry too. I know it was hard for you. It might have been hard for you to deal with all of it. And I will forever be honored and grateful and careful. I just want to say sorry, Lena. For the pain my life caused.” Kara was now crying and she can’t look Lena straight in the eye.

Lena was speechless. With what all Kara said and the moment of her memories flooding her back, she just felt sorry for Kara for feeling this way. For carrying a guilt that wasn’t even her fault. She wanted to reassure the other woman that there was nothing to be afraid or sorry of. Ever since Andrea, she never really made a gesture to comfort other people, because she was always the receiver of all the comforts because she was the one hurting.

But seeing Kara so broken in front of her and all the admission and all the confession of guilt, she can’t help but offer the comfort to the blonde in front of her.

“Kara.” She whispered and placed her hands on the blonde’s cheek, gesturing her to face her. When their eyes meet, Lena tried to ignore the pull of the blue eyes in front of her. “You don’t have to be sorry about anything.” She told her.

“I may have lost Andrea, but I’m not mad that you are here. I am hurt, I miss her terribly, but I am happy that you are alive and well. I don’t want you to think about me ever being mad at you. Never. I will be fine. And I am. You just live, okay? No regrets. Andrea would also be happy to help. You’re a great person, Kara Danvers.” She said and gave Kara a long hug. It was not an odd kind of hug but a hug to make the blonde feel that she was fine.

“Thank you. Thank you, Lena.” Kara said sniffing.

“No need to thank me.” Lena said pulling away from the hug. They just stood there close to each other, neither of them pulling away when Lena’s driver arrived.

“This is me. Thank you for tonight, Kara.”

“Thank you for tonight too. I’m glad to know a bit about you. I’ll see you on Monday?”

“See you on Monday.” She answered. Hesitating with the thought of leaving, she leaned over and gave Kara a kiss on the cheek and walked towards her car, not looking back at Kara. She got in the car.

_I kissed her on the cheek. Was that alright?_

She was not sure what got into her. She did the deed even before she can think about it. She was too tired to think, so she just closed her eyes as her car drifted away.

Meanwhile, she missed the look on Kara’s face when she walked towards her car. The blonde was blushing 50 shades of red, feeling like she’ll faint.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think guys. <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We're going to look at what exactly happened to Kara Danvers before she met Lena Luthor. I hope y'all like this chapter.  
> I tried to make sure that the time lines here are correct so if there are any errors, I hope you forgive me. 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

**_2 Years Ago…_ **

****

“Come on, Danvers I know you have super speed spirit in yah. Give me a good run.”

“This isn’t even a real game James.” Kara laughed at her friend.

“I know but it is for charity you know.” He answered.

If one thing was to describe Kara Danvers, it was that she had super endurance and great stamina. She was barely tired, always energetic and always ready to give her 100%, if possible, even her 1000%.

“Yeah, I know, and to give it to that, I’m not even a CatCo employee. Remind me why am I doing this?” She asked. They were having a half time break. Seated at the bench.

“It’s because you care about the people that this event would help.” He shrugged. He did have a point. The proceeds would definitely land to the orphanages that they help and it was a good thing for her. She loved helping people like them. _People like her._

“And besides, not everybody here is a CatCo employee.” James gestured over to their right. “Even I got your sister to play with us, and she’s a doctor who's dating a cop.” He stated as a matter of fact.

“How did you even convince her?” She asked. Totally shocked that her sister took part of this. Sure, Alex was strong and athletic, but she never liked being in front of a crowd.

“Well you know, journalist scoops. And tips about where they need to check? You know how she loves helping Maggie. I swear to god she can be a cop too if she wanted to.”

“You cheater.” She laughed. “Just because you have sources doesn’t mean you get to use that to get my sister to play.”

“Well, she didn’t say yes because of the tips you know.” He smiled. “She actually joined because she knows that this would mean a lot to you. She really loves you, Kara.”

“Thanks, James. This really means a lot.”

“Anytime. And you really know how to play. You were almost recruited for the national team. I don’t understand why you didn’t accept it.”

“I didn’t decline. I just asked them for more time. You know, I still have a few months to finish my Masters in Journalism. I’d like to finish that and maybe still play a few games here and there. I do get paid.” She teased giving a _kashing kashing_ sound to add effect.

“Whatever you say, Kara.” He stood up. “Let’s go. It’s time. You can do this. For the kids?”

“Always.” And with that she stood and drank the last gulp of her water. She ran towards her sister who was also approaching her.

“You ready?” Alex, her sister asked her.

“Yep. Let’s kick some ass.” She confidently said.

They rushed over to the field. It was a friendly match. They were leading with 2-1 and they needed to win this. Kara puts her focus on the game.

As the game started, there was pain that surged her chest. She seemed to ignore it, faulting it to the exhaustion that is caused by playing for almost an hour.

Alex runs beside her having the ball with her. Alex was handling it and she made sure to dodge the opponent who was running towards her. Her sister kicked the ball to only a foot from the ground to make sure that the opponent was not getting her. _Damn, her sister still got style._

However, fate wasn’t in their hands this moment. Alex was being chased and for now, Winn was the only one who was free. Kara gestured to Alex to pass the ball so she can hand it over to Winn. Her sister got the message and with a swift kick, the ball came towards Kara and with a swift move, she got it using her head to halt it and then kicked it with slight thud to keep it balance in between her feet.

Winn was already waiting at the other side when her chest felt another pain. Trying to ignore it, she continued to run towards Winn and she stopped. The pain was too hard to ignore and the last thing she remembered was everyone was running towards her, and everything went black.

\---

When Kara opened her eyes, all she saw was white. White walls, with sheets, a white bed, and…

“Kara, thank goodness.”

She can’t quiet put a name to the voice. She was unsure but she felt like something attached to her. When she properly opened her eyes, her vision was becoming clearer and there she saw her sister. Alex was standing beside her, but she was sort of calling for someone, who she’s calling, she would never know.

As she was still gaining focus and some strength, she noticed what was attached to her. There were a few wires at her chest and a few monitors surrounding her. It was clear that she was in the hospital, but she was confused with what reason it might be. She tried to open her mouth, but it seemed dry and she was also thirsty. Thinking about her current state, she didn’t recognize a doctor coming inside the room followed by 2 younger people who seemed to be interns given their younger appearances.

“Dr. Marsh, she’s awake.” Alex said talking to the blonde doctor. She looks pretty. _Really, Kara? Why not focus on your state first._ The doctor was now looking at her and she was smiling with a look of relief.

“How are you feeling Ms. Danvers?” The doctor, _Gayle Marsh – Cardiac Surgeon_ as written in her name plate asked her. And seeing the title addressed to someone as young as Dr. Marsh, Kara’s thoughts wandered. She wasn’t worried by the idea that something was wrong with her, she was more focused on how good looking the doctor was.

Given her state, she gestured to her lips. Telling Alex through telepathy that she needed a drink.

“Oh, sorry.” Alex realized what Kara was telling her. “Here. You can use this straw.” She said handing the water bottle to her.

Sipping whatever amount of water that she can, Kara felt relieved. Thirst forgotten, she was happy that she can move her lips, let alone produce a sound out of her lips.

“I think I’m okay.” She examined herself. “But how I am here? I mean, what happened to me?” This time, it was all registering to her. _Why is a cardiac surgeon standing in front of me?_

Alex gave her a glance and then gave the floor to Dr. Marsh.

“It’s great to know that you are okay. And to answer what happened to you, you were rushed here. And I don’t know how I can make this easier for you, Ms. Danvers.” The doctor exhaled. “We ran you some tests and they returned with the result that you had a heart failure.”

“But how is that even possible?” She squinted her eyes.

“After running some more tests, we have found out that you have a congenital heart disease.” The doctor gestured to the 2 interns that were beside her giving her what seems to be a chart, or a picture of a heart.

“See this?” She gestured to the heart diagram in front of her. “It seems that your heart was having a hard time pumping air for your body. And it may seem odd but there are instances of congenital heart diseases that are only visible once you are an adult. And that seems to be the case for you Ms. Danvers.”

“I don’t understand. I mean, why now?” She asked confused. If she had this since birth, then why only show now.

“As I said, signs and symptoms don’t always give way when we are younger. However, the explanation that you only had experienced this now is because of the exhaustion that your body had. It may have been that before…” The doctor paused, “You play soccer, right?” She asked.

Confused, she just gave the doctor a small nod.

“It seems that when you were younger, your heart was able to function well based on what your body needs. It was enough and sufficient during those times. However, as we age, the body also changes. Thus, your heart was not ready when you were in the field again. It was forced to function double than what it usually does.”

That actually made sense. Between her masters and other things, it was actually a long time since Kara last played. Straight out college, she pursued her masters so she can be a sports reporter or journalist. That was her dream. But hearing this now, how can she do that. The circumstances were not so lovely for her.

“But—but what happens now?” She asked. Fear enveloping her. She knew that matters of the heart were the toughest ones to manage. She was not broken-hearted, not romantically speaking at least. She looked at herself. Her heart monitor was attached to her, and there were still wires all over her. The doctor may have senses what she was thinking.

“We need to make sure that we monitor your heart still for the time being before we let you go or decide on doing something.” She smiled. Her smile made Kara calm down a bit, but she was still scared for the life of her. “We’re here to help and make sure that you’ll be fine. For now, I am positive that there is nothing to be worried about. You’re actually responding very well to the medicine that we have been giving you. That’s already a good sign. If we get to see the progress, you can definitely go home in 2 days. We still want you rested.”

There was a sigh of relief from Alex. “Thank you, Dr. Marsh.” The older Danvers’ said.

“We’ll get going then. Make sure you’re rested. If you need any help, you can call my 2 interns here.” She gestured to the guy and girl that was behind her. “This is Dr. Querl Dox,” She gestured to the guy, “And this is Dr. Nia Nal.” She said gesturing to the girl. “They are on their last year of residency. They are great I can guarantee, so don’t be scared to ask questions.”

“We will. Thank you, Dr. Marsh.” Alex said as they gave one final smile to Kara and left.

She felt quiet. The doctor was confident that she was doing fine. But it didn’t make her feel better. She had a congenital heart disease, and she didn’t know what to say to herself. It was like a joke. Growing up in the soccer team, National City University’s 2-time MVP, all the work out sessions and activities. She was always active and then all of a sudden, this happens.

“Oh, Kara.” She hears Alex say in a whisper kind of way approaching her. She felt her fingers brush over cheeks. She didn’t even realize that she was crying. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Alex.” And with that, she allowed herself to cry.

Cry.

That’s all she can do right now.

\---

“Hey, how you feeling now?” Alex approached her. It was almost evening, 4 hours since the news that she had a heart failure was given to her. She glanced over to her sister who seemed to just finished doing her rounds.

“You know I think I have sister privilege because you work here, but turns out, that I can’t use that to let them give me a latte.” She joked.

“You’re not allowed that for now. Maybe try again next time?” She said smiling at her sister. “I missed you. I know I’m just around the building but I’m sorry I can’t really go over every time. We have a lot of patients down stairs.”

“Don’t worry about me, Alex. I’m fine.” She answers accepting the side hug her sister gives her. “Physically I can say that I’m doing better but emotionally, with what happened earlier, I—uhm—I don’t know, Alex. I can’t still so wrap my head around it.”

“You don’t need to wrap you head around it immediately, Kara. You need to process this. And it’s not an easy thing to do.” Alex sat down at the end of her bed. “I won’t say that it’ll be easy but you’ll eventually need to accept it and learn to live with it. With that, we need to be extra careful, Kar.”

“I know and I understand that. But living with this, it means that I can’t practice soccer anymore. That’s what I always loved doing.” She looked down at her hands, missing the way her sister brush of a tear from her face. “I still have writing, but it’s just not the same.”

“I know, Kara. I know. We’ll figure this out, one by one. I’ll be with you ever step of the way.” Her sister said reaching out to her hands and she took it looking for an anchor.

\---

“Hey, how is my favorite patient today?” Kara took her eyes away from the book that she was reading seeing the lovely doctor from yesterday.

“Stop calling her your favorite patient, Dr. Marsh. She’ll really believe that.” Alex said to her colleague.

“Dr. Danvers, I think I already told you to cut the formalities.” She said rolling here eyes.

“I will if you call me Alex.”

“Okay, Alex.”

“Thank you, Gayle.”

“Kara.” The two doctors stopped their banter looking at the younger Danvers’. “I am fine, thank you for stopping by.” She smiled coyly at the blonde doctor. “And Alex, stop flirting with my doctor.”

The two doctors laughed and looked at Kara at the same time.

“Don’t worry, Kara. I am certainly not flirting with her. This woman here, is already taken and engaged.” Lifting the other doctor’s hand truly showing a simple diamond engagement ring.

_Oof. And here I thought I had a chance with you._ Kara said to herself.

“I’m also here to tell you that your vitals are all going well. Nothing major on anything else. Your heart rate is keeping up, oxygen levels are great and your tests came back with high colors.” She said with a wink.

“Does it mean I get to go home now?” She asked, already missing her own bed.

“Yes. You can definitely go home, but not today. You can go home tomorrow. We still want you rested. And I’ll be giving you your prescriptions. For now, please refrain from any tiring activities. We want to make sure that your heart is coping well. You can still exercise. That is highly recommended but nothing to straining. Is that clear?” The doctor shot her a raised eye brow.

“Noted on that. I’ll make sure to avoid any tiring physical activity.”

The doctor’s face shifted onto a different expression. Something more serious this time.

“Please make sure that you do that. Look, Kara.” She sighed and went closer to her bed, touching her shoulder. “You’re lucky that nothing major happened to you. Heart failures are a night mare, there are times that we need medication but given your congenital condition, the worst thing to happen is to actually have a heart transplant. That is not what we want so try to stay healthy and make sure to visit me or contact me if there is anything that you feel strange.”

She was just relieved that she didn’t need a heart surgery. That would have been worst.

“Yes. We’ll make sure of that.”

“Thank you, I should get going. I’ll see you tomorrow, Kara.” Gayle said giving her a final squeeze and a faint smile as she went to the door.

“So…” Alex said hesitantly.

“What?” Kara asked confused.

“What are your plans? I mean, after this?”

What was her plan? She really didn’t know. She had many offers, but all she can think about is the fact that she is somehow limited as of the moment. Or is it a permanent limitation? She’s not sure of that as well.

“I don’t know, Alex.” She said dejectedly.

“Well, we can figure it out one step a time.” Alex assured her. No need to rush, Kara. Everything will be alright.”

Alex was right. One step at a time.

\---

It was a after over 3 months since Kara got out of the hospital. It still didn’t quiet made sense to her but she was actually doing her best to stay healthy, and not stay tired. She was glad that her sister was there to take care of her but sometimes, big sister can get pretty annoying. She was sure that most people would agree with her. During recovery, Alex always made sure that Kara was taken care of. She wasn’t actually sure if it was the sister in Alex, or the doctor in her that always worries about her. But she was thankful still.

She was currently busy with completing her masters so she had plenty time in her hands. In fact, she felt like she had all the time in the world. She wanted to find a job but given the situation, Alex clearly advised her that she can just focus on finishing her masters before looking for a job. Even Gayle backed Alex up. _Just great._

Truth was, all her life she felt like she was always being taken care of. Ever since her adoption, although her relationship with Alex had a rocky start, coming to terms of their sisterhood made Alex literally take her under her wing. She was always there for her and she made sure that Kara knew that. Oh, did Kara knew. She really did. But Alex made sure that Kara doesn’t have to feel guilty of anything. Truth is, Kara was never guilty, she just feels like she doesn’t want to burden her sister anymore that she is doing right now. Like, she was sad, she wanted Alex to have a life of her own and trust Kara that she can be better.

Being caught up in her thinking, laid back on her couch on a Tuesday evening, Kara heard her phone receiving a message.

_Coach J’onzz: Ms. Danvers, I was thinking if you can meet me tomorrow noon at the University. I wanted to discuss something with you. By the way, I heard about what happened to you. I hope you’re doing great. Tell me if you can make it around 12PM._

Kara was happy. She had a great relationship with her former coach. He was the one who always pushed her to her limits and made sure that Kara was at her best. She just wondered what the talk would be about. It was unusual, but she wasn’t going to turn down an offer of lunch from her great coach.

She quickly sent a reply saying that she was fine with it and made her way to finish her agenda for today. She had always found it a good calming effect of just leaving the T.V. on when she was doing her job. It stayed on mute but the movement from the device made her feel calm, made her feel not alone. As she turned her head to glance at the T.V., she saw the infamous Lena Luthor being interviewed about one of the new things they were developing, something called _Nanobots._ She quickly unmuted the T.V. to hear what the woman was about to say.

Truth is, although with a major of journalism, Kara had always been fascinated with Science as well. Her adoptive family being all doctors, she kinda swayed the other way but the field of Science had her interested all the time. And right now, she really got more interested because the woman speaking, _Ms. Luthor,_ really seemed to know what she’s saying.

_“We want to make a new medical breakthrough, were not there yet but we’re really doing the best that we can.”_

Kara thought that the youngest Luthor was so smart and hearing her speak about their current research makes Kara feel a bit small, but not in a bad way. Everyone knew who Lena Luthor was. She was the youngest daughter of Lionel and Lillian Luthor, a scientist and her achievements with bio-engineering, chemical-engineering and robotics was hard to miss. And after her brother’s downfall because of drug abuse, she was then appointed as the new CEO of then Luthor Corp and was now rebranded as L-Corp.

All these were great achievements and she was so young. Kara had nothing but pure admiration from the woman. She was never one to be intimidated, but for her, Lena Luthor deserves all the admiration that she can get. She just glances over the T.V. for a while more and she wasn’t aware that she was just staring at the woman and not bothering anymore about the topic.

_She has lovely green eyes._

It was around 9PM when she felt her body tired and she propped herself to her bed, slowly drifting into sleep. Last thing she sees were a set of green eyes.

\---

“It’s lovely to see you, Ms. Danvers. Thank you for accepting my invite.” Coach J’onzz said as the blonde approached the seat that he was currently in.

“My pleasure. Anything for my favorite coach.” She smiled and took the seat in front of him. “And please, it’s been a year since I left, I’m not your student anymore or player, please call me Kara.”

“Sure. Call me J’onn.” He smiled and offered to order for the food.

She still had questions as to why she was here but she let that settle at the back of her mind for a moment. But J’onn was the one to break the ice and go down with business.

“So, I bet you’re wondering what you’re doing here right now.” He said in a more serious tone. “I heard about what happened to you. How are you doing so far?”

She was no longer uncomfortable talking about this anymore. If you would have asked her like a few months ago, then she would still be on defense mode and not want to answer any question. But this was J’onn and she knew that he meant well. So she just let her guard down.

“Honestly, I’m much better than last time. Thanks for asking.” She fixed her glasses. “It wasn’t easy, but knowing that right now I am a little limited for the time being given the heart condition, it really takes a lot on me to adjust. You know, I love soccer and all but for now, I can only do light exercises and running. Nothing big. And I’m focusing on finishing my masters. Hopefully, I’ll be done in a few months’ time.”

“Of course. And I know that it sucks on your part.” He said a little bit of chuckle but still caring tune.

“You have no idea.” She gave him a smile. “I was pretty sure that I’ll try doing soccer again after the masters, but instead I’m doing masters, and now, no more soccer.”

“Well, that’s partly why I am here to meet you, Kara.” He shifted again to a more serious look. “I know how heart problems work. My dad died of one. And I want to tell you that no, you are not limited. You’re just taking a pause.” He smiled. “I feel like somehow, a part of you is taken away because of the situation, but I want to help you.”

“With what, exactly?”

“I assume you’re not working now, is that right?” He asked, not in an invasive kind of way.

“No. Alex, she won’t really allow me.”

“I know that’s why I talked to her first before talking to you.”

“What do you mean?” She asked curiously.

“I wanted to ask for your help.” He sighed. “My assistant coach as of the moment is on an indefinite leave. He needs to sort somethings out. And I met with you to ask if it would be fine for you to fill in his position just for the time being.”

“Wha—why, how is – why me?” She asked as bewilderingly.

“You were one of my best players, Kara. Your positive disposition has always helped and right now, that’s what I really need for an assistant post. You can think about it. I’ll give you time, but the offer is for you. Just for the time being.”

“And you talked to Alex about this?”

“Yes. I know that she’ll be worried and she has every right too. But it won’t be tiring for you. You just totally oversee. I explained it to her and maybe you should discuss this with her too.”

She was unsure of how to react. She was happy? Nervous? Relieved? She was sure but all she can do now is just to give J’onn a beaming smile as she nodded enthusiastically.

“I definitely will and I’ll get back to you. Thank you for thinking about me when this happened. I’ll make sure to keep in touch.” She said as their orders arrived, a whole new different topic was discussed.

_This was a great start._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More chapters coming up!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a disclaimer that I do not have any knowledge about medical terms or anything. This is just all part of the story and I hope you don't hate me for some medical errors here. (LOL) 
> 
> Hope this chapter is a good one!

“Come on, Alex. I really want to do it.”

They have been discussing this matter for around a couple of minutes already. Alex was getting the point but ends up getting worried about the complications.

“I know. And I want it for you too. But I’m just worried you’ll be too excited and forget that fact that you should be resting.”

“J’onn said that I just need to supervise. I won’t be doing any kind of physical there. Please, Alex. I need this.” She sighed. She was going to fight for this, she will not bend. “After the news about my heart, I was certain that I was out of the thing that I love doing the most.” She paused and inhaled a lot of air before continuing, Alex for her part was just listening to her intently.

“I thought that I would never be able to do it again. Well, with the offer, I won’t be the one doing the thing I love the most, but I get to help people be good at it. I already lost that part of the dream, Alex. I don’t want to dwell on it as much but if this is the closest thing that I can do to feel like I’m still able to play soccer, then I’ll do it. Even if you don’t allow me too. I don’t want to be like this. I miss my craft and being in my element. It sucks that it doesn’t get part of my life, but I won’t let that dream die down just because of what happened to me. I hope you understand.”

She felt Alex touch her arm and led her to the chair. There was silence between them, but not a bad kind but more of a comfortable kind. She was familiar with this. Alex was thinking and it was a good sign.

“I know. And I’m sorry. I don’t want you to ever think that I will not support you. Of course, I always will.” She said as she made Kara face her as they were seated. “If you really want to do this, then I’ll support you. Banners and all. I’ll even give you the Danvers traditional first day planner if that helps.” She teased giving levity to the atmosphere.

“Thanks, Al.”

“Anytime, Kara.”

\---

It was a little over 4 months since Kara started her assistant coach stint and she was almost getting the hang of it. It was not easy, not getting all the action but somehow, she’s determined to help to the best of her abilities and be an asset to the team. Her master’s program was almost to an end and she is making sure that she also gives her best out of it. Thinking about the past months, she was certain that everything was quiet falling into pieces.

Until it wasn’t. Or it still is. She isn’t so sure anymore.

As of the moment, she is hyperventilating, and has been staring at James for almost half an hour, in the middle of the day. She was not sure if she heard him right when he first stated the reason why he was meeting with her.

Almost 8 months after her diagnosis, here she was still lost of words. She told James to give her a moment. She needed to gather her thoughts, and maybe a few sips on her iced latte.

“Are you serious about this offer?”

“Yes, Kara. I showed her your portfolio. She was happy to see if you’d be fine with it. You really have a way with words.” James assured her.

She was always confident with herself. But today, it was different. James had invited her over to coffee to discuss something about what Kara can do in the future. He was the resident photographer of CatCo Worldwide Media and a good friend of Kara and her cousin. Currently, as they speak, he was telling Kara that she has been considered to be hired as one of the new junior reporters. Apparently, James took the liberty to give her portfolio to the higher ups.

She didn’t know if she should be happy or pissed.

James was only trying to help.

And he believed in her.

But she couldn’t believe that this was happening.

Everything was too good to be true and she was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. James must have sensed what she was feeling because he suddenly touched her shoulder and pulled her back to reality.

“Kara, trust me. You got this.” He said with confidence. One that Kara lacks as of the moment. “Many things happened; you don’t have to decide right now. Just think about it. You know where to find me.”

“I know. It’s just too good to be true right now. I mean, I’m almost done with my masters in journalism and then all of a sudden CatCo is right in front of my door steps. I know I am ready for this, but I’ll just finish my year first and then get back to you. If that’s okay?”

“Sure, Kara. Take your time. Don’t rush on this one, okay? James assured her. “Anytime you’re ready.”

After a few moments, they have finished their quick meeting and Kara went ahead with her day.

\---

The time passed so quickly and before Kara knew it, she was finished with her master’s program. She still hasn’t accepted the offer from CatCo because she wanted to make sure that she was well equipped once she gets the role. She was grateful that James seemed to understand and their head was surprisingly fine with it too.

One step a time.

Everything was moving according to her plan.

Finish masters. Check

Part time soccer gig. Check.

She was right on track and she loved every moment of it. She was doing great.

Until she wasn’t.

“Kara!”

That was the last thing that she heard before

**\---**

_**September 15, 2017** _

As she opened her eyes, she was back to a very white place. She felt cables attached to her chest once more and her body feels sore and like she’s been hit by a truck. She wasn’t dumb. She knew where she was and she definitely knew why.

But it was just unfair.

She was exhausted mentally and emotionally about the thought that she was once again betrayed by her heart. And it was not a fun betrayal. She made a noise to get the attention of the people around her. If there was anyone. She didn’t know. She couldn’t move.

Giving herself a pep talk about how she can do it, _just move a finger, Kara._ She was able to do it. And she didn’t expect that the person that would be there for her was Maggie.

“Kara. Thank, God you’re awake. Let me call, Alex.”

She can’t nod and she was sure that she can’t even properly open her eyes. But she was thankful that Maggie knew what to do. _She always knew._

As she concentrated on breathing, she heard hurried steps coming into the room.

“Kara. Thank goodness!” She can hear Alex’s hurried breathing as she entered the room at her back was none other than her favorite doctor.

“Kara.” Gayle said in a calm voice and gave her a sweet smile. “I did say that I enjoyed our frequent check-ups, but I didn’t mean that you need to go this far.” She teased to lighten the mood up, which Kara was thankful for.

Alex was right beside her and gave her water so she could drink. Just like the last time that they were here.

“How long was I out?” She asked all of a sudden. She already knew why she was here.

“Just a couple of hours.” Alex was the one who answered. She looked calmer right now.

“Thanks.” She was able to regain a bit of strength to sit down. She was not happy that they were back here. Something bad might have happened to her. And it was not thrilling. “I know why I’m here. But I’d like to ask what happened to me, like why am I back? I thought I was doing good?”

“Yes. You actually were that’s why we were shocked to know that you were brought here again.” Gayle answered looking at Kara. The doctor knew that the younger Danvers was upset.

“As I’ve mentioned before, heart ailments are very hard to predict. One moment you know you’re fine and the next you’re in a hospital.” Gayle sighed. “I won’t try to conceal anything from you Kara. Over the past month’s that we’ve been seeing your progress, it’s really alarming that this has happened. And I don’t want to keep you guessing. It appears that your heart is getting a lot worse as we had expected. We’re still trying to see what made this happened, but for now we’re considering a heart transplant as the only best option for you.”

Kara was at loss of words. She glanced over to Alex to say something, but Alex who always has something to say is also currently as loss of words. This couldn’t be her life now.

A heart surgery would mean less action for her and Kara was all about action and moving and running and being active. Maybe less of those but she couldn’t wrap her head around it. It was easier if she was asked to choose between potstickers and pizza. No. Who was she kidding, it was hard to choose, she loved both. But right now, she knew that she had to be rational and calm about this information. She was stressing and it was apparent with the beeping that was happening on the monitor beside her.

“Kara, you have to calm down and don’t stress yourself with this. We don’t want to have another episode.” Alex said.

“Sorry. I just feel tired again.” She answered.

“You should get some rest. Currently, we had you on the waiting list and for the donors and we need to do this as quickly as possible. I had someone check on possible heart donors around the area. Hopefully, we can get one by tomorrow.” Gayle told her but she was looking at the people around the room.

“Thank you, Gayle for being so on top of this.” Alex said sounding really glad that the doctor was helping them as much as possible.

“Of course. Anytime. For my favorite patient.” She said as she gave Kara one last faint smile and left.

“Kara. I’m so sorry.” Alex said hugging her sister. Kara felt small hands rubbing her back and glanced to see Maggie doing the gesture. It was too much for her but she was glad that she had them both.

Thinking about it, Kara knew that she didn’t want that to happen. A heart surgery is never an easy thing to handle, but if she wanted to live and make sure that she will for a long time she needed to do it. And she knew that Alex would want that too. She’s just overwhelmed by the situation. It was fast, but it was necessary. It’s was supposed to happen.

“It’s okay. I’ll do it.” Kara said. More to herself than the people around her.

“This is a huge deal, Kara. I agree with you. I just can’t feel but be emotional. You know. I, I thought I lost you.” Alex said as she tried to stop the tears from falling. This made Kara smile a little. Alex was always one to be so strong for them, but deep down she’s just as soft as a marshmallow.

“You really got us scared there for a moment, little Danvers. Don’t you ever do that again. For the second time now apparently.” Maggie said beside her.

“Sorry you guys. I don’t even know what happened. I was feeling good and then the next thing I know, I’m back to this place.”

“Well, we just have to make sure that we’re never getting back to this place then.” Alex answered.

“But you work here?” Maggie answered her.

They all laughed.

\---

_**September 16, 2017** _

“Kara, we have a heart for you.” Alex came panting as if she was running a marathon.

_I could live._ That’s what she said in her head. She was excited, without knowing that there was grieving and wailing across the other part of the city. One green eyed lady.

\---

Three months after her heart surgery, Kara had the go signal from Gayle to start working again but only with minimal tasks. With this, she had accepted the work that James offered her and started working as a Junior Reporter at CatCo.

“Now, you would have been really an asset in the soccer charity event since you’re working with CatCo now.” James said as they were getting back up getting their coffee.

“ _Would have been,_ James. But sadly, I can’t do that. Not right now. Maybe not ever.” She sighed. She was still sad with the fact that this was her now. She loved her job, thankful that it was still available when she was too. But soccer was also something else.

“Maybe you could still coach? Young kids maybe? So, it wouldn’t be so hard on you. I mean, they are less stressful than teaching a bunch of college people. Kids are easier.” He offered.

She thought about it for a while. Of course, James was right. Maybe she can do that. Some other time as long as she gets a go signal from Gayle, and also Alex. By extension, Maggie.

“Thank God you’re both back.” She saw Winn ran towards them, breathing heavily. “Sam is looking for you.” Winn gestured to James, “And Snapper is looking for you.” Pointing at Kara.

And like clockwork they all heard a familiar nickname. “Pony tail!”

Yep. She’s that girl now.

\---

The days went by quick enough for her to appreciate everything that she had now. She barely even realized that it has been ten months after her surgery.

She had a new heart, and it made it possible for her to live longer. She was closer to her friends and she was safer with this. Occasionally, she would still remember the feeling of running freely without any hesitation and be nostalgic for a while. She knew that it was no longer an option for her. Not now. Maybe some other time.

She finished her article when she saw Sam, her new boss walking towards her.

“Hi, Kara.” The brunette greeted her.

“Ms. Arias. How can I help you?” She said. Happy that she wasn’t a rambling mess in front of her boss.

“Please, call me Sam. I hate it when you say Ms. Arias. I feel old.” She chuckled and all Kara can do was nod in acceptance. “I’m seeing that you’re actually good with words and you’re a great writer. I want to make you an offer.”

_Oh._

“Oh.” A look of surprise was evident in Kara’s face. If Sam Arias gave you and offer, then it would really be big and would take you to a whole level of responsibility.

“No. Not _Oh_ , Kara. That wasn’t the answer I was looking for.” Sam chuckled. Kara for the life of her blushed at the retort and she too gave a small chuckle.

“I’m sorry, Sam. Let me do it again.” She paused and gave Sam a sweet smile. “Oh. I’d be happy to check that offer of yours.”

“Not quite good, but that’s better.” Sam said as she straightened herself. “Meet me in my office in 15 minutes. I want to discuss this offer. I think it’ll help you move fast to the ladder, and I want my best reporter to have that shot.” She said and gave Kara a funny wink before leaving.

“Right there with yah, boss.” She gave her a faint salute that really looked silly and Sam shook her head. Kara Danvers was after all a puppy with golden locks, much like a golden retriever or something. She was silly, playful and loyal.

She had 15 minutes to get these final papers to Snapper before he snaps her head off, and again. Just like clockwork.

“Pony tail!”

_Ugh. She rolls her eyes._

Around after 15 minutes and a bit of _encouraging_ words from Snapper Carr about her article, she made her way towards Sam’s office as she was instructed to.

“Sorry for the delay. Snapper had some things to clarify and of course, you know what happened next.” She smiled faintly as she closed the glass doors to Sam’s office. Sam chuckled and gave Kara a sweet gesture.

“Take a seat, Kara.”

“Thanks, Sam.” She was clamming her hands together, which didn’t go unnoticed by the way.

“Kara. Are you nervous?” The brown-haired woman asked. Leaning closer to Kara.

“No, I’m not nervous.” She tried to hide the squeak in her voice, but failed. She wasn’t good at this.

“Kara.” Sam smiled and walked towards were Kara was seated. “Let’s sit on the couch. It might be more comfortable to talk there. You look like you were called to the Principal’s office.” She teased.

“I have never been called to that place. I was a great student.” She defended, and with that Sam laughed.

“I know. You’re such a darling and a perfect girl. You’re smart, adorable and you are very sweet. You are also professional and very talented with words. You give meaning to words on a different level.” Sam said while she was making herself comfortable on the couch.

“Uhm, thank you?” Kara was blushing. She never really heard Sam gave her compliments like that. She knew she had what it takes to be a great reporter, but her boss boosting her ego was one way to make her feel like she really had one hell of a chance.

“But I’m not here to give you compliments, Kara. As much as I’d love to do that all day, I actually have an offer for you. And I considered this one a great favor as well.”

“What is it about?” She then started being curious.

“I want you to interview Lena Luthor.”

_This time, she was ready to faint._

“I—me? Lena Luthor?” She stammered.

“Yes. You. And I trust that you are able to push through this. This will really help you a lot, not only career wise but ability wise. You’ll need to do some research of course and make sure that you make this one of your top priorities.”

“But isn’t she on vacation or something?” Kara asked curiously. She knew of course that Lena was the CEO of CatCo. She knew her bosses and she knew that Lena Luthor wasn’t around National City.

“She’s currently stuck in France, not on a vacation by the way.”

“Are you sure I’m the perfect person for this job? A lot of senior reporters would be dying to do an interview with Ms. Luthor. They might murder me if news spreads out that I get to have that chance.” She was certain that her head was floating and she was afraid for her life.

“Don’t be silly, Kara.” Sam smiled at her. “Every body here loves you, I’m aware that you know that. And I assure you that they wouldn’t mind. Besides, I had a lot of consideration on this matter. And a few people agreed with me.”

Kara still seemed skeptic about it. She wanted to do it. Who wouldn’t? She thought about it while they were in a silent moment. With a small amount of courage, she straightened her shoulders and faced Sam with the bravest face that she can muster up as of the moment.

“I can do that. I think I can interview her.” She said determined. This was her chance to a good career and she was going to take it.

“That’s great.” Sam chirped at Kara’s response. “You still have plenty of time to be ready about it. She’ll back in like 2 months, until then. Make sure you ready all your questions and ideas about this. Toss it to me, and I’ll see if that’s good. Clear?”

“Thanks, Sam. I won’t let you down.” She assured her.

“I know you won’t. That’s why I chose you.”

\---

Today was the day. But with all her luck and power, she surely does know how to screw things up sometimes. She knew that she didn’t have to binge watch another season of Brooklyn 99 last night but Jake and Amy were so cute and she just had to watch it all. She just got back from Midvale yesterday and jet lag plus Netflix isn’t a good combo so it seems.

What made things worse though was she didn’t sleep until 2AM in the morning due to nervousness and excitement.

And right now, here she was in running. She was always a calm person but she was cursing herself in her head at this moment.

_Stupid, stupid show._ I will never watch Brooklyn 99 again if I mess this whole thing up. Of course, everyone knows that she won’t live up to that promise but she was determined to just rush towards the elevator. 

“Wait! Hold the door!” She said panting. She knew she shouldn’t be running like that, but this was the big day and she didn’t want to be late. She was still panting and her head hung low trying to get all the air that she can.

“Are you okay?” She heard a woman ask out of concern. It seems that her distress was very evident at the moment.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Still panting and head hanging low. “Thanks for holding the door.” She stood straight and made sure to brush off her shoulders jut to gain a bit of confidence for the day. She needed that if she wanted the day to go by well.

However, her day wouldn’t be made well.

Maybe not today.

Because as of the moment here she was, staring or rather trying to be unaffected with the fact that she was currently inside the elevator with the one she was going to meet.

Lena Luthor and her freaking perfect jaws and green eyes like it was boring down to her.

_Damn._

She needed air again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More chapters being done!   
> Stay tuned and tell me what you think


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! 
> 
> I'm really sorry for the late update. I've been really busy and I hope this would somehow make do.   
> I have a few typos in here. I haven't really read through it but I hope you'll like this chapter! <3

Her heart was from Andrea Rojas. What a small cruel world and it wasn’t even a joke to begin with. She didn’t know how to react to this new information.

It took her forever to try and look for her heart donor so she can extend that gratitude to their family. It had been anonymous for a long time and even Alex who works at the hospital couldn’t get information from her end or she would be reprimanded badly.

Of course, many people knew who Andrea Rojas was. She was the CEO of CatCo and it was a tragic news that she died because of an accident when she just got back from one of her trips. She wasn’t even a part of CatCo then, but being friends with James and Winn for a long time gave her insider knowledge of the big media empire.

It was a lonely day for media when the news broke. There were lots of mourning. And now, she was certain that Lena Luthor mourned the most. It was the love of her life.

She remembered the day that the couple had announced their engagement. It was all over the news. She didn’t really care to put much attention into it because she was rather busy with her own life but remembering those times that the news of the engagement happened, she was sure that the youngest Luthor was the happiest during those moments.

And now, she had the heart of the woman that Lena Luthor loved. Or still loves.

What kind of messed up world is this.

She wasn’t mad or ungrateful about it. But learning that her anonymous heart donor happened to be her _not boss_ at the time was a real shocker. Not only to her but to her whole friends and family.

She remembered getting a call from an unknown number that afternoon. Telling her that they knew who the donor was and to her surprise, it was actually Lex Luthor who gave her a call.

She knew what happened to the eldest Luthor. She was a journalism student after all. The drug abuse stories, the corruption happening at Luthor Corp that time and the few faint cases of money laundering that were not proven to be true, she really didn’t know if she could trust him.

But she chose to trust him after he said all the facts and all the details that she needed to hear. What made her agree more was the fact that she was able to say thank you to her donor’s family. During this time, she still didn’t know who her donor was or she was related to the Luthor family.

So, she mustered up all her courage and went to that dinner.

And after that night, a moment of her and Lena alone. Kara was sure that she will do everything in her power to protect this heart. Not only for her, but for one Lena Luthor as well.

\---

“So, l want to clarify that.” Kara said while putting her recorder off. “On a Monday, you usually have a spinning class? Is that what it’s called?” She was currently seated in Lena’s office and they we’re doing the start of the week long interview with Lena.

“Yes. You heard that right. I do love to always stay in shape and healthy, or else I won’t be getting the attention I would be needing.” She shrugged. They both got up and walked out of the office. Kara thought that it would be lovely for the CEO to walk around L-Corp for the other parts of the interview. They were almost done with the basics of being a CEO, a little walk wouldn’t hurt them. But this spinning class information was surely going into the article.

“I don’t think you needed a strategy to get the attention of some people, Lena. You’re actually not a hard one to miss.” She said without thinking and she realized her mistake when she saw Lena Luthor gave her a raised eyebrow, not because she was offended with the comment, she seemed to look rather _amused._

“Is that right, Ms. Danvers?” She can hear the teasing tone in Lena’s voice. They had only known each other for a while but she was sure that the younger Luthor was not as scary as some people would say.

“No. I mean, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—you know, not like that. I would never say that in way—” she was still rambling when she saw Lena gave her a small smile. “Yep. Shutting up now.” She made an imaginary zip on her lips.

“I was just kidding, Kara.” Lena assured her laughing a bit. “But sometimes, I really need to. Being a woman in a man’s world makes you want to always up your game. I am a CEO of a multi-billion-dollar company, and I am only 27 years old. Those men inside there?” She gestured to some of the rooms that they were passing by, “They would only listen to women if you are either pretty, or if they want something from you that would benefit their causes. I prefer being in shape not to only gain their attention, but to also send a message that I am not somebody that they can just belittle.”

_Wow. So, this was Lena Luthor._

“That’s actually impressive, Lena. Who would have thought that you have it in you?”

“Well, I am a Luthor after all.” She said but this time, there was no spite into it. Just a light tone. “With that in record, you need to join me. This is after all a _week with Lena Luthor_ , right? Pack your gym bags. I’ll meet you there at the venue at around 4PM.”

“Sure. I’ll see you there Lena. Thanks for making this easy for me.” Kara said as she gestured towards the lobby exit.

“Anytime, Kara.” Lena gave her a polite nod as she saw her retreat back to one of her labs. She was certain that this was going to be a long day after all.

\---

Lena was not sure how to react about the whole week of interview with Kara Danvers at first. She was sure that it was ridiculous and she couldn’t believe for the life of her that Sam had made her agree to do this. But Lena was nothing but professional and committed so when she said yes she made sure that she will go with it, however, she didn’t know how this week would go after today.

Seeing Kara Danvers in her current spinning class, less the button up shirts and the chinos, she was certain that it was going to be a hard week.

Kara was sporting a grey fitted tank top that showed out the outline of her shoulders and _golly_ are does abs? She wasn’t sure what she was seeing or if she was seeing things correctly but she was certain that she felt uncomfortable looking at Kara Danvers that way. She knew she had good arms, but those are not just good arms, _delicious._

It didn’t kill that Kara was still looking adorable as ever.

_Get it together, Lena._

Yup. It was going to be a long week.

They were getting ready for their class and Kara was just setting her bag down to one of the lockers that were provided to her. Apparently, Lena had already given a tip that she would be joining and made sure that she was treated as if she was already a member of the class, thus the lockers availability.

“When did you started spinning classes?” She heard Kara asked her as she was still stuffing her bag inside her locker.

“I tried one class when I was in France a few months ago. Then when I decided that it was time to go back to National City, I tried to look for a class, and I’ve never been happy that I tried. It was better than running around under the scorching sun.”

“Well, the sun has it’s benefits Ms. Luthor.” Kara teased her. Of course, the sun had its benefits in deed. Looking at Kara, she was like an actual ray of sunshine. She didn’t want to make anything more embarrassing for her so she steeled up in her professional aura and went ahead of Kara but leaving her a sweet smile before retreating to the blond.

_Just one spinning class._

\---

After a few more days, Lena was getting more comfortable with Kara. They had been meeting every day to get through with Sam’s idea for the article and they made a huge progress so far.

Kara had been with her in conferences, site visits and even one of L-Corps labs. Not her personal lab but where their prototypes are currently being crafted. Aside from work, they also had dinners or lunch just enough to cover everything that they would be needing for an article.

Lena remembered how Kara’s face scrunched as she saw her eating kale and made it her life mission to at least let Kara try and eat it. It may have seemed like she was making plans in the future, but she was rather fond of the blond.

Given the fact that she has Andrea’s heart, there was something about the blond that makes Lena feel like she was always welcomed. She wished that she can be friends with Kara, although they seemed like it, she didn’t want to impose. You don’t just declare friendships, right _? You have to ask for it?_

She doesn’t have any idea. Truth was, she only knew Andrea through a social gathering and then they became friends because Andrea asked if that would be alright with her, eventually they became an item. She was friends with Sam but she was the one who actually said she wanted to friends with her, thus their budding friendship.

“So, we’ve covered pretty much everything about me. But I still don’t know much about you, Kara.” Lena said as the blonde reporter turned her recorder off.

“Nothing is interesting about me. I’m just a boring reporter.” Kara answered while fixing her things.

“I find it hard that nothing is interesting about you. What do you do aside from being a reporter?” She was curious about the blonde in front of her.

“Well, like I said before I was a soccer player. Not in the major leagues although I almost got there, but ever since the heart surgery, I never really tried playing again. So as a side line to the hobby and to not let passion die down, I teach soccer.” Lena tilted in head as if she was trying to absorb what Kara was saying. Sure, she did mention something about soccer but she didn’t pegged Kara as an actual player.

“That really amazing, Kara. You must have felt really bad not playing the sport you love the most. But teaching kids? That’s really noble of you.”

“I only do it on weekends. Which is tomorrow. I used to assist in the NCU’s soccer league. I was an alumnus there. My coach got me the gig, that was after my first episode. Then James, one of CatCo’s resident photographers got me to working with the company. I loved doing both.”

“I understand now why Sam got you to interview me. You really are amazing, Kara Danvers.” Lena said smiling.

“It was a pleasure working with you, Lena.” Kara smiled back and stood up from the couch. “I hope it doesn’t seem unprofessional to you, but I hope we get to see each other often. You know, outside of working?” Kara said the nervousness evident in her voice.

“I hope so too, Kara. I had a lovely week.” With that the blonde flashed her signature and beaming smile at the CEO.

She watched as Kara exited her office. There was relief that the week of interview was over, but a part of her was sad knowing that she wouldn’t be able to see Kara again the following day. She did have soccer practice after all. Musing to herself, she heard a loud ring associated to only one person.

“Hey, Sam. What’s up?” She said answering her phone informally.

_“What? ‘No This is Lena Luthor speaking?’ today?_

“Cut it Arias.” She laughed.

_“Fine. So, how’s the week? I just received a message from Kara that you already finished and she says you were delightful to work with._

“It was fun, but I sure am glad that it’s all done. I loved the company but you know how I also love my privacy.” She answered swirling her seat towards the glass windows at her back.

_“I know, I know. Thank you for making this work, Lena. I really love you!”_

“You better.” She shook her head. “So, why are you really calling me? It’s not like you’re just giving me an update about something I already know about. What’s this call about, really?

_“Can’t I just call my best friend?”_ Sam answered her and Lena quirked her eyebrow up and Sam continued immediately as if she’d seen Lena do it. _“No, really. I wanted to ask you to come with me and Ruby tomorrow. She has a soccer game and she wants us both there. If you are free?”_

Funny. Is soccer really going to be a part of her life right now?

“Sure. I’ll be there.

\---

“I swear that Ruby was so excited for me to meet her supposedly new coach. She can’t stop talking about her. I think she has a crush on her or something.” Sam said and they already walking towards the car, Ruby already inside waiting for both the adults to join her in.

“Give the kid a break, Samantha. I bet she’s also excited to show her skills to you. Remember that you wouldn’t really sign her up for soccer because you feel like she’s too small for it?” Lena said as she opened the passenger side of the car.

“And now I’m the excited one. I know she’s going to do great.” The other brunette said with pride.

They drove towards the soccer field. It was inside Ruby’s school grounds and there were a lot of people already. Truth was, aside from seeing Ruby and Sam, Lena also wanted to see how a soccer game really goes. It didn’t really have anything to do with a certain blonde reporter, that’s what her brain told her.

They got out of the car and headed towards the locker rooms to give Ruby a good luck hug before the game started. Ruby gave them a quick hug back and ran towards the lockers and the two adults walked towards the bleachers.

“She was only a baby. Now look at her, she’s all grown up and having friends. I swear one day she’ll forget me and just hang out with her friends.” Sam said with a soft sigh.

“Cut it, Sam. She’s just 10 years old. You have more time and you are the best mom. I’m confident that she will always love you.” Lena assured her friend. As they were sitting down, Lena took her phone to check some emails that needs her attention. She didn’t notice that Sam was tugging her until she felt her phone being taken away from her.

“Give it back, Sam.” Lena said annoyed.

“Lena, look.” Sam gestured towards the field, where Ruby and her team mates are. “What’s Kara doing here?” At the mention of the name, Lena gave her full attention towards the field and she swore that the field really got all her attention.

She squinted her eyes and she was sure; it truly was the blonde reporter. Of course, she was teaching soccer and of course it had to be where Ruby was a part of. What a funny _coincidence._

“I don’t really know.” Lena lied. Well, not truly lied. She knew that Kara was teaching soccer, but as to why she was here, she was surprised by that too.

“I remember reading her profile.” Sam said trying to contemplate a reason why the younger Danvers was there. “Oh! I remember now! She used to play soccer, and she does this as a part time gig!” She said beaming with the idea that she figured it all out on her own. Lena just chuckled at her friend and shook her head. _What a dork._

Kara was being, well, uhm, Kara.

She was her usual sunny self, but with a bit of authority in her. She was sporting a plain white V-neck shirt topped with a black bomber jacket with fitted grey sweat pants that showed how her calves were defined. Lena remembered the spinning class and she blushed at the thought. Kara looked like a school jock fresh out of high school and the winning look was a white baseball cap. It had Ruby’s school logo in it.

_She must be the new coach. Ruby has good taste._ She smirked to herself.

As if Sam could read her mind, she actually voiced out what she was thinking all along.

“I guess she’s the new coach” She said. “Ruby has good taste.” She said eyeing over Kara from afar. The blonde was beside a man who looks like the coach himself and they were giving instructions and telling them to warm up.

With this Lena snorted. It was established a long time ago that the both of them were exclusively into women, but hearing Sam unintentionally say that Kara is apparently _good taste_ made her cringe.

“Samantha Arias! You are not lusting over your employee.” She chastised.

“Well, technically she’s not my employee. She’s yours.” Sam shrugged. “I’m just one of your pawns. Allow me to ogle a little. Come Monday, I’ll forget that hot Kara Danvers exits. She’ll be back to her pastel loving self.”

“You’re a handful, Sam.” She said as they both took their seats. Her best friend gave her a small wink as the game started and peered on cheering for her daughter.

\---

They continued cheering over the sides as Ruby ran towards the goal. Sam was such a soccer mom making sure to give extra cheer to her daughter and Lena found it adorable. Also, she was trying her best not to glance at a particular spot on the field every 20 seconds. Not that she was counting, but truth is Kara was starting to be distracting.

The CEO has finally concluded that yes, Kara Danvers takes her soccer seriously. The blonde was standing with her hands on her hips and her eyes were laser focused on the game that made Lena think about what other things does she put that kind of focus on.

Being lost in her thoughts, she remembered Andrea. No, she wasn’t a sports kind of girl, but all the focus was just like Andrea’s especially when she needed to win over a merger or to have a deal finished on one of their board meetings. It was one of Andrea’s traits that Lena loved so much. Just the thought of it makes her heart ache and she didn’t want that. She was here to cheer on Ruby and to spend time with Sam, so she returns her attention to her niece.

The game finished and Ruby’s cute team won. When it ended, Lena and Sam saw all the little girls Ruby’s age gather around their coaches and looked like they were chanting or singing something. That was definitely something. It was great to see Ruby win but another thing to see how Kara Danvers is really good with being around people, a trait that she seems to really possess so easily.

Lena remembers Andrea for a while. Of course, Andrea was always good with people. That’s what made them click. Lena was the aloof one, always cornered and guarded, while Andrea was like a magnet to people. She can waltz into the room and get anyone’s attention. _Not_ that she can’t do the same but she (Andrea) was somehow the same as Kara. Both a crowd favorite.

The blonde was currently high-fiving the whole team and giving them all reassuring smiles when the two women approached. She was preoccupied so she didn’t see the two of them approaching her.

“You did really good, sweetheart. I’m really impressed.” Sam said as she waltzed over to her daughter who made a quick run over to her and smashed her with a big massive hug. That’s when the blonde turned her head up and saw Lena and Sam walking towards their direction.

Lena noticed the look of confusion on Kara’s faces. She had an oddly good-looking crinkle that she finds cute. Realizing that the blinking out of curiosity, she was the first one to bring answers.

“When you said coaching, I didn’t know that you were actually coaching Ruby’s team?” Lena said as they approached the blonde Danvers.

Kara still unable to comprehend what was happening, just gave them a blink and glanced at Ruby and then Sam and then repeated it a couple of times more. “Oh.”

Lena and Sam chuckled. They were enjoying looking at a confused Kara. Specially Sam.

“Oh. Arias. Of course.” She smiled. “Ruby is your daughter!”

“Bingo Kara! Astute observation” Sam teased.

“I’m so sorry. I really didn’t put two and two together. Looking at it now, I guess the good looks run in the family.” Kara smiled and gave Ruby a deep red blush and Sam being a shy school girl. Lena just rolled her eyes. This mother and daughter duo is really something and Kara seemed oblivious to the fact that she had reduced Sam into a shy red mess.

“So, mom and Aunt Lena, I want you to meet Coach Danvers.” Ruby said chirping up.

“Yes, we know her sweetheart. She works with us.” Sam said gaining composure. “She is one of my best reporters at CatCo.”

“Great to see you here, Kara.” Lena said. “And you did great Ruby. That was a wicked run you did. I’m surprised you’re not panting.” She continued.

“Coach Kara gave us exercises to boost our stamina. It helped a lot.” The young Arias beamed. Proud of her resistance and their win.

“So, how about we go and get lunch to celebrate your big win.” Her mother said.

“Can we have burger and fries today mom? I’d kill for a milkshake too.”

“Sure sweetie. Why don’t you join us Kara?” Sam offered. “We can go to this good burger place that Andrea brings us before. Ruby loves it there.” She said absent mindedly missing the way Lena paused. If Kara saw the way Lena paused, she didn’t dare to point it out.

“Sure, let me just get my things.” She gestured to her back awkwardly and ran towards the benches. Sam had noticed the shift in the air all of a sudden and glanced over to Lena.

“Oh my gosh, Lena. I am so sorry. That is so insensitive of me.” Sam’s eye widened at the realization.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’d love to go there too. Don’t worry Sam. I’m not upset.” She assured her friend giving a light tap at the shoulder as Kara approached them with a backpack.

\---

They were sat at the diner and Lena was a tad grateful that there were not a lot of people around. She didn’t mind the crowd, but it was a hot day and she enjoyed the chill inside the diner, given the lack of people.

“So, it was really surprising to see you there Kara. When did you started coaching Ruby’s team?” Sam asked as her daughter browsed over the food on the menu, the blonde was actually doing the same and her concentration on food was as laser focus as her attention with soccer.

The blonde looked up and looked at Sam. “Well, to be honest I just got into the whole children coaching game like a month ago? I think or more than that. I can’t really remember.” She gave a shy smile. “When I love what I’m doing, I tend to forget the time and get lost into it.” She finished.

“That’s really great to hear Kara. I’m glad that Ruby has you as her coach. She says a lot about you.” Sam said grinning at her daughter who was beet red at the moment. Lena of course had found this cute and hilarious.

“All good things, I hope?” Kara said smiling glancing at Ruby and Sam just gave out a loud snort. Kara really had no idea how adorable she is even in the eyes of kids, Lena thought.

They chatted while waiting for their orders. During the span of celebratory lunch with Kara, Lena had started noticing somethings that made her remember Andrea because of the way the blonde acts.

The ways she looks at Ruby when they were having a conversation. She seemed really interested and not in a forced kind of way but actually shows genuine interest. No matter what Ruby tells her, she is sure to listen and to give insights. Andrea loved Ruby and the little girl loved her fiancé back just as much. When Andrea died, Ruby was devastated. She was crying for a week and it was hard to pacify a child with heart ache and Lena was mending hers too. She was more thankful for Sam for being there for her and her daughter. She was truly a great friend.

She also noticed how Kara would thank the servers and give them a hand even if it was not her job. If there was one thing, she admired Andrea the most, it was her total respect for people. She didn’t look at other people like a spoiled rich girl, but she treated people fairly. And Kara was doing a good job at it as well. It was so on point that she felt Andrea’s presence all over again.

There were a lot of things bugging Lena while spending time with Kara but it was not a bad thing. She was just glad that Kara is enjoying herself and Sam is having a field day with her _hot Kara Danvers day._

She can let the bugging feeling go for the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's another update because I really feel awful.   
> I hope you'll like the next chapter.   
> Tell me what you think and if you like it.   
> Comments make me hopeful :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another update! I really hope you'll like this one.   
> A little moment for our lovely ladies.

This was not how she pictured her day to go. She was feeling a lot better for almost a month now. After her lunch with Kara and Sam, she had dismissed the bugging feeling and it never bothered her again. But right now, she needed to reevaluate the bugging feeling or whatever kind of feeling she has.

This is how it goes.

It started after the lunch after Ruby’s soccer game.

Kara had texted her that she enjoyed having lunch with them.

_Hey, thanks for letting me tag along. I had fun._

And then another message.

_I hope we can do it again next time. Keep safe, Lena._

She was not sure but she felt her heart glow at the thought that Kara was happy with her company. Well, not her only but with Ruby and Sam as well. But it was the same right? Lena just gave her a reply of confirmation that it would be really nice to have lunch again with Sam anytime soon. She got a heart emoji in response.

She shouldn’t really be feeling anything about it. It was only a heart emoji. But deep down, she did but dismissed it totally. This was not going to bother her and she needed to be productive. And so, she did.

The next time it bugs her was on she went over to CatCo. to meet the upper management. Present were James Olsen, Kara’s friend, Sam as her interim CEO and Snapper Carr. Others where representatives from their bosses who wouldn’t be available for the day because of some assignments they needed to finish.

However, this meeting can never be to easy on Lena. Nothing was ever easy for her. _Why can’t life be simple for once?_ Before gathering the group, she was on her way up to the office when she made a quick detour to the comfort room. But lo and behold, it did not bring her comfort at all.

Because as Lena was opening the door, she was greeted by the sight of one Kara Danvers, who was currently busy closing her button up shirt and had her back against the young CEO. How Lena saw the abs? It was because of those darn wall mirrors.

She came to a complete pause that brought the reporter to pause as well and glanced at her. Kara for her part blushed a deep red that was almost the color of Lena’s lipstick and she hurriedly covered herself.

“Oh my gosh. I am so sorry.” The reporter scrambled and tried to quicken her actions. “I swear I locked the door. My other shirt got covered in coffee so I needed a change.”

Lena was still paused, a bit distracted by the image earlier, she shook the thoughts and gave Kara a quick smile.

“No problem. No harm done.” She said with confidence. Internally, she was fighting the bugging feeling again. She glanced at Kara who was neat as new right now and gave her an assuring smile. Kara gave her a wave and smile as she exited the doors.

“Keep it a secret?” Kara grinned before heading to the doors.

“Your secret is safe with me.” She smiled. If Kara referred to the incident and Lena thought about the abs no one would ever know.

The third time was when the article about her was published.

That was a new level of bugging.

As Lena read the article, she was moved by how Kara wrote about her and presented her to the whole reading community.

Growing up, Lena was always thankful to be part of a loving family. Lex was his best friend but sometimes it was hard to be away from him and make a name of her own and she felt like she was a shadow. Her parents were loving as well. Well at the beginning, it was hard for her to trust Lillian most of all, but Lillian had proved her time and time again that she can be trusted. Although, she was also annoying from time to time but she appreciated her mom for always looking after her.

But the way Kara presented her, it was like a new light.

_The Luthor name may have been tarnished in the past, but Lena is more than that. She brings hope to the people around her and is an inspiration to the younger generation._

_Lena Kieran Luthor is a very well accomplished woman. Spending the entire week with her made me realize that being accomplished is not the same as being happy but you can always make it work to be happy. Like most of us, she has bad days too and she makes sure to rise to the occasion and prove that there is always a solution to every problem, be it scientifical or just out of luck._

_She is amazing and I am glad to say that she is an ordinary person like most of us, but extraordinary just by being a force to reckon with. Well loved by her people and her friends, definitely not your ordinary Luthor._

She had lots of interviews before but this one truly presented her in a way that she always hoped for. To be seen as her own person and not someone who only exists because of her family.

She made a mental note to thank Kara and express her appreciation for the article.

She really needed to sort this feeling.

She sends Kara lots of flowers and a whole supply of potstickers for the whole month from her favorite place.

_Lena! You’re my favorite person now!_

Kara sends her message with a picture of the potsticker delivery for that day.

She felt the bugging feeling all throughout the day.

And back to the present day, where she is currently reevaluating the bugging feeling she has every time Kara was around.

It was supposed to be an easy day, but of course, she was a Luthor and it was never supposed to be easy for her even if she wanted to. So, when she was about to head home after a day full of board meetings, she never expected to have Kara’s hands wrapped around her waist willing her to be steady.

She stared into those now familiar set of blue eyes. It was calm and soft. Kara was looking at her too and her face was a few inches away from hers.

“Lena, you almost fell down there.” Kara said not taking her eyes off the brunette. If Lena’s breath hitched at the almost whisper way Kara said those words, she was quick enough to conceal it.

Lena didn’t remember falling because as soon as she slipped over the side walk, a strong arm suddenly caught her and steadied her. She was just walking tiredly; she may have not seen the hole on the side walk.

Kara pulled her back up, her arms still around Lena’s waist. Lena knew that her heart was beating fast but she was completely unaware of the reason. If the reason was Kara’s strong arms or their closeness, she won’t be able to know because Kara took her arms off her waist once they were on a good standing position.

“Thank you, Kara.” She said glancing at the blonde. “I really should watch where I’m going.”

“Hey it’s okay. Right place at the right time.” Kara said smiling.

“My hero.” Lena can’t help but tease. Kara gave her a reassuring smile and scratched her neck to cover the blushing part of it.

“Well, now you have a secret too. I’ll keep it for you.” The blonde said in a teasing way. Lena just laughed and Kara followed her action. “Have a safe trip home, Lena.” She smiled and gave Lena one last lingering smile as she walked away, but giving another glance at the younger Luthor.

Yeah. Lena had a lot of reevaluating to do.

Because the fast beat of her heart was definitely not because of the way Kara’s arms were place on her waist.

It was not their closeness.

But it was because of Kara Danvers herself.

Her very presence.

Lena went home that day realizing that maybe she was developing feelings for the blonde reporter.

Wait, that was fast.

They only knew each other for a few months and it was not that long. Hell, she even admitted her feelings for Andrea after almost a year of being friends so this was definitely not like that. It was just a crush.

She was allowed to have one. After what happened, she deserved to have at least a happy crush of some sort. And that was the beam of light personified. Kara Danvers. Yep, she can watch over her crush. She can work on that.

At least she was honest with herself. There was no point in denying it. Kara made her feel things and mostly because she reminder Lena of Andrea. Not really because of her own traits. She shouldn’t really feel guilty about it. It was normal. Andrea would understand that she had a crush. It was fine.

Not like she was going to act on it.

Not intentionally.

But here she is, on a Wednesday inside her favorite café at lunch time waiting for one specific blonde reporter. She wasn’t sure what had gotten into her. It was just a last day at L-Corp so she opted for a walk. This was a once in a life time moment where she can get to walk around because there was nothing much to do with her job and she wanted to enjoy every moment of it that she was able to.

She was walking at the park, with a certain blondie in mind. She wasn’t sure what made her do it, but she called Kara and asked if she was available for lunch and for all her luck, the reporter said yes to her and said to meet her at Noonan’s.

“Lena, I’m so sorry for being so late. Snapper bit my head off.” Kara said panting as she took the chair and sat on it.

“Kara it’s okay. You didn’t have to rush. I was fine with waiting. Don’t exhaust yourself.” She said worrying about Kara’s condition. Kara was mostly healed but it was still good to be preventive Lena thought to herself. “And besides, you’re not late. You’re just in time actually.” She glanced at her watch.

“I don’t want you to wait and besides, I’m actually excited to be here. I haven’t really seen you for a while.”

Lena tried to maintain the blush that was trying to creep out of her skin by ducking her head down. It was futile, but she was too embarrassed to care.

“Well I’m glad that you’re here too. It’s really good to see you, Kara.” She smiled and tried to keep her crush at a minimum.

“So, what have you been up to?” Kara asked as she took the menu, smiling and not taking her eyes off the brunette.

And with that Lena feels like her whole day is better.

\---

CatCo was currently hosting an event to raise awareness about protection of the press. Lately, it has been happening that many people involved in the media had been attacked in multiple occasions solely because of what they have written or reported that had revealed anomalies and wrong doings. Mostly of them are very powerful people.

This was an important event to say the least. Truth will not prevail if all the people revealing it would end up being injured or worse _dead_. So, Lena and her team made sure to host this event to raise awareness and to show protection of the press. Luckily, Cat Grant agreed right away once this was planned. Lena may own CatCo but it was Cat Grant who brought it up to perfection. She respected the woman in every way possible and was happy to look up to her as a mentor, but happier that they had become friends.

She had looked up to the woman ever since she took over L-Corp after what happened to Lex. She had always admired strong women. Her mom, she was number one and now Cat Grant was another figure that she would definitely listen to.

“Well done on the event, Lena. There are a lot of people here and it still doesn’t seem like a circus.” Cat suddenly materialized out of nowhere and Lena almost jumped from where she was standing.

“Cat, goodness. You gave me quiet a shock.” She had her hands in her chest.

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” Cat waved her hand and rolled her eyes. “I knew you would do well despite what others had told me. Even the clumsy youtubers present here would agree that this event has a good cause.”

“I’ll make sure to tell that you think so highly of them, Cat.” Lena chuckled.

“Please do. Tell them to subscribe and like my channel too.” Cat said sarcastically. Well, that was Cat Grant. Always sarcastic but highly wise. “It’s really good to see you, Lena Luthor.” Cat gave her a small smile. Her eyes shone with great pride on how CatCo was doing. It made Lena assured that she was definitely doing a great job.

“It’s good to see you too, Cat.” She answered back. “It’s not all me though, I have Sam to thank. She was the one who mostly handled CatCo while I was gone.” She paused. “You know, when I was across the sea.” She said in a lower voice.

“Lena.” Cat touched her elbows as a gesture of comfort. “I know that I wasn’t there when you needed me. I truly am sorry about what happened to Andrea. I just hope you are doing quiet well now.”

“Don’t worry, Cat. I’m better. I know it still stings but, I need to move on and make sure that life goes on.” She smiles. “And besides, it’s not like Andrea would want me to stop taking care of your company. She was all about pleasing you. Remember the trip she gave you to that Spa in Hawaii?” She teased.

“I’ll make sure to invite you when I get a volcanic massage again.” Cat teased back.

She gave Cat one last hug before she went away and entertained other guests. They were packed and she was happy that many of the press and the guests from National City and neighboring cities came.

As she was roaming around, she saw a very familiar figure that she hadn’t seen for quiet a while. After their lunch last time, Kara was a bit busy making sure that here stories were done on or before the deadline. They still continued to ask how the other one was doing but they can’t seem to do another lunch as they planned.

It was almost after a month that it had happened. And although Lena was sure that she had her little crush under control, spotting the blonde reporter made all her efforts futile on the control department. She was about to approach the blonde when a person that she despises came into view and was approaching her as well.

“Lena Luthor, you are a sight for sore eyes.”

“Morgan Edge, I can’t say the same for you.” She replied sarcastically.

“Aw, Lena. Be nice. You should be happy I didn’t sue your company for all the bad press you’ve been giving my company.” He told her like it was a casual day for the both of them.

“Well, I can’t say that I care. Sue us if you want but there isn’t anything wrong when my people write what is true, and with full evidence that had been investigated upon.”

“You can do what you want, Lena. But remember, I’m not an easy enemy.” He says in gritted teeth.

“Who says you have us as your enemy?” Morgan and Lena both whipped their heads as they looked at Kara who was already behind Morgan.

“And who might you be?” Morgan said without genuine interest.

“Kara Danvers, Mr. Edge.” The blonde placed her hands in front of her as a gesture to shake the man’s hand. “I wrote the article about the lead poisoning that happened recently courtesy of your uhm… your company.” She said that with a huge sunny smile on her face.

Lena almost wanted to slap Kara for saying that. Glancing at Morgan, she saw the anger in his eyes and it looked like he was losing it. But at the same time, she was surprised to see this side of Kara. She was the perfect example of confidence and bravery. She wasn’t scared to reveal herself to someone who might potentially do something bad to her. She stood her ground and made sure to keep the eye contact with Morgan Edge.

_Hot._

_Super-hot._

Was all Lena can think about. Her thoughts came back to how confident and strong Andrea was. That was one of the reasons she loved her. She was strong and determined, and apparently, so was Kara.

“I hope you find it in you to have some respect, Ms. Danvers. I am not an easy man to scare.” He said in anger but in a low voice that only the three of them can hear.

“Don’t worry, Mr. Edge. I assure that I respect you the way you should be respected. I respect you like I respect vegetables.” Kara said still smiling enthusiastically.

“And what does that mean?” He challenged.

“Oh.” She chuckled. “It means that I don’t, at all.”

Lena almost barked a laugh when she heard what Kara had said. It was true. When they ate lunch last time, Kara was making a gagging face while Lena ate _green stuff_. It was how Kara described them.

“I’m not afraid of you, Mr. Edge. But I do want to say that we don’t think of you as an enemy. It’s just that, you’re not an ally as well. Have a good rest of the night sir. Enjoy the place.” She said finally as she stepped closer to Lena and placed a hand on her back as they walked away from Morgan who was still standing with his mouth agape with what had just transcribed.

When they were almost a certain distance that made sure that won’t be reached by Morgan, Kara stopped and glanced over at Lena with a worried look.

“Are you alright, Lena?”

Lena can’t seem to make up an answer. It was only now that she had seen Kara in full view. She was wearing a crisp dark blue navy suit that was tailored perfectly in her body. She looked dapper than her normal cardigans and pastel shirts and dresses.

When she still didn’t respond, she felt Kara give her a squeeze in her arms before she realized that she had dozed off to somewhere while admiring the sight in front of her.

“I’m fine, Kara. Thank you.” She said and schooled herself and she remembered what happened and gazed at Kara. Still not believing that she had done those things.

“That’s good. I just saw you there with Morgan Edge earlier and I didn’t like what he was doing so I thought about going in, sorry if I just butted in.” Kara said while fidgeting. Her strong and confident persona suddenly vanished and she was back to her eye-glass-fixing self.

This Kara and the one earlier is completely different and the shift were sudden. All in all, Lena had found it cute. She can’t help herself but give the poor blonde comfort so she reached over to her elbow and stopped the blonde from fidgeting even more.

“Kara, Kara. Please.” She said smiling. “You were actually brave tonight. Thank you for rescuing me there. I couldn’t stand him for even just a second.” She assured Kara.

“I’m sure you would’ve handled it fine on your own.” Kara glanced at her, her fidgeting stopped. “You’re a very strong woman yourself.” Kara’s hands were at the back of her neck, just like the last time.

Lena can’t help the blush that was creeping her face. She was thankful for the lights though, they helped cover up her face _. I should give the organizers a bonus._ She thought.

“I may be strong…” She said as she squeezed Kara’s elbow and slid it down to the reporter’s hand. “But I do need some saving from time to time. And you, Kara Danvers. I will say it again.” She smiled and met Kara’s eyes.

“You are my hero.”

And with that, the blonde smiled with her megawatt beaming smile.

“Yeah?” The blonde said in a breathy tone.

“Yes, you were brave. But also, kind of stupid.” Lena remembered what Kara had did. “You actually gave yourself out and I’m pretty sure that Morgan has his target on you.” Lena scolded Kara lightly.

“Well, it isn’t only Morgan Edge though. I’ve written quiet a number of articles on some other business men with shitty business. So, I’m pretty sure there’s a line before he can get his turn.”

Lena raised her eyebrow and stared at Kara. “Is that suppose to put me to ease?”

Kara chuckled. “Nope. What I meant was, I know how to handle it. So, don’t worry and just enjoy the night. Okay? Besides, the event was made to raise awareness for press protection anyway. We’re on the right track.”

“You are something else, Kara Danvers.”

“You too, Lena Luthor. You too.”

They walked over to where the rest of the other people are side by side and Lena can swear that she can hear her heart beating with Kara’s closeness to her. They went ahead and saw James and Winn who were currently talking to other guests. To her surprise, Lex was with them and he was having a conversation with the team.

“Lena, Kara!” Lex called for them as they were walking towards where they were gathered.

“Mr. Luthor, great to see you again.” Kara said shaking Lex’s hand.

“Please, Kara. Call me Lex. Everybody here calls me that.” He smiled and shook Kara’s hand as they joined the group. They talked for about a few moments when Kara received a call.

“Excuse me, I may need to take this.” She said politely and excused herself. Lena just followed the blonde with her gaze as she went to some place where it was a bit quiet. Truth was, she was enjoying the night because of the people around her and especially being around Kara.

She didn’t notice the slight nudge at her side.

“Hey, sis.” Lex said in a teasing tone. Lena eyed him for a brief moment and he just stared at her grinning sheepishly.

“Spit it out, Lex.”

“What?” He said defensively. He was a bad liar. “I’m not doing anything. Can’t I greet you? I haven’t seen you in a while you know?”

“Lex, we literally work in the same building.” She deadpanned.

“I missed you. And I missed seeing you smile like that.”

“Smile like what?” She asked curiously. Was her crush showing? Was she being obvious?

“Like you’re just really happy.” He said sincerely and Lena was surprised at how Lex said it so casually.

“Was I not happy?” She asked. They began to excuse themselves to get another glass of champagne, Lex followed her.

“I’m not saying that you’re not. I’m just saying that you’re glowing. And I’m glad you are.” He sighed and placed his arm around Lena’s shoulder giving her a side hug. “Whatever the reason is, just keep going at it. I missed this side of you.”

“Thanks, Lex. I’ll keep that in mind.” She eyed Lex lovingly and her brother was looking at her at a funny way. She was thankful that Lex didn’t pry further.  
  


“So… Kara?”

“Shut up, Lex.” She wasn’t thankful anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for checking my story even if I update so late. I hope I can update faster. I appreciate you all.   
> I swear I won't abandon this story. I want a SuperCorp Endgame.   
> <3
> 
> Tell me what you think :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter for you guys!   
> Hoping you'll like this one too.

“You think this will work, Lena?” Sam asked her.

“Of course, it will. Just trust yourself. You’re good at this Sam. I wouldn’t have picked you if I wasn’t so sure about it.”

“You are literally asking me to fly half across the world to some conference, for 3 days if I may add.”

“Yes. And it’ll be done before you know it. Just go there and represent me. I just can’t leave right now with all the development that we’re doing at L-Corp. Lex has been very helpful but you know the board. I can’t afford to leave right now.”

“I know. But you really owe me big time.” Sam rolled her eyes.

“You’re a life saver!” Lena said hugging Sam. They were currently roaming at the dry section of the grocery store. “I’ll make sure to give you a bonus.”

“You better. And give a good gift for the coming holidays.”

Lena just rolled her eyes at Sam and continued looking for the supplies that she needed.

“By the way…” Lena glanced over to her friend when she heard her say something. She was currently ahead by a few steps.

“By the way, what?” She asked.

“A little birdie told me that you enjoyed yourself at the event last time?” Sam said trying to be subtle at the real meaning behind the question. Lena knew her friend. Sam was her oldest friend and they have been best friends ever since college. She knew if Sam was just asking or if she wanted to confirm something.

None the less, she tried to pretend that she didn’t know what Sam was up to and answered as honestly as possible.

“Yes, I did. It was a great success. I will see to it that we host events like these yearly.”

“And did a certain blonde kept you company? You know, the secretly hot-blonde-on-a-Saturday-morning kind of blonde?”

“Just go straight to the point Sam.”

“Well, Kara. There. We have a name ladies and gents!”

“Yes, I barely knew anyone there and Lex and the others were with us. So, to answer your question: Yes, she did keep me company alongside the other people that represent the company.” She answered while checking the label of the flour that she needed.

“I bet she was hot too. Lex told me everything.”

Lena raised her eyebrows at Sam. “Are you two gossiping about me?”

“What? No!” Sam said incredulously. “Why would we gossip about you and the way you look at Kara. No never.”

Lena laughed at her friend’s antics. Although deep down, she was nervous that this topic was something Sam would not surely let go that easily.

“You know, Lena. I think Kara is cute and she maybe a little fond of you from what I heard. I know you’re still moving on or something but I’m sure that if you give yourself a chance, you can find another person that you’ll be interested with.” Sam said not taking her eyes of the spam that she had. “Or maybe fall in love with.”

Lena stopped at her tracks with what Sam was saying. She knew that she was drawn to Kara. Even admitted to have a crush on her, but thinking about being with her was whole new level.

“I’m not sure, Sam.” She said as she started walking down to the next isle. “I’m not saying that I don’t find Kara attractive or any other person for that matter but I don’t think I’m ready to date just yet. Not for now.”

She saw Sam look sympathetically at her. “Don’t worry. I love Andrea but I have moved on already. I miss her and I even know that she wouldn’t want me to stay single for a long time. But I’m just not there yet.”

“I’m not pushing you, Lena. It’s just that, from what I heard, you were glowing the last time that she has given you company. I’m not saying to go on that territory already but maybe just give yourself a chance and a shot at this. Try going out or spending time with her or any other people for that matter. You’ll never know what’ll happen. No rush, just don’t close yourself.”

Lena knew what Sam meant and she was more than happy to acknowledge the fact that while Sam was doing her speech, her mind seemed to drift to Kara. And she needed to try. Sam was right.

“I do actually seem to have a crush on her you know?” Lena admitted in a low small voice.

“I knew it! Lex owes me a hundred dollars!” Sam chirped laughing.

“What? You’re betting on me too?” She said in disbelief. She was certain to torture her best friend and her brother.

“Not quiet, but we did just to prove a point. Don’t worry. I’ll treat coffee with the money I’ll be getting.” Lena rolled her eyes at her friend but she was definitely smiling. “And besides, I voted that you were the one with the crush and would admit it first, Lex was rather convinced that Kara was the one giving you lovey dovey eyes the last time.”

“I will seriously murder the both of you.”

“You love us, so that’s a no.” Sam said laughing as she walked past Lena. “Now that truth is out of the table, maybe just with it and see where it’ll go for you. You’re not professing your love yet, but you just know her as a person. Learn things about her you know. Nothing special and romantic.”

Lena just nodded and proceeded with the task at hand.

\---

Lena was smart.

She was beautiful.

Confident.

Brave.

Witty.

Generous.

Caring.

But the only thing that Kara can think about now is how amazing Lena is. How truly amazing she is.

It had been a week after she had seen Lena. And if she was being honest, Kara would know that she really liked hanging out with the younger Luthor. She enjoyed their lunches and their quick meet ups, but most of all, she enjoyed just being around Lena even if it means sitting around a press conference that L-Corp has organized to introduce one of their newest products that would change the course of history.

That’s what she heard.

It was a huge crowd of people from a whole lot of different places. She knew that this thing L-Corp made would make a big break. As she was musing about what would be happening today, she didn’t recognize that it had started already.

Sam sent her here to represent CatCo and make sure to get great insights about the product. They were at an advantage of course, but all is fair in media so she didn’t used her friendship card with Lena to get an exclusive. She knew that she needed to earn it in a hard way.

So, here she was now in a room full of people looking over to a screen that was currently playing a video with how medicine had enough breakthroughs and how it honed the safety and the effectiveness of health and recovery in the world.

_We aim to make sure that we advance even in the world of medicine and health care. So now, we would like to call the woman of the hour. The one behind this remarkable invention that would pave the way for healthcare in the world._

_Lena Luthor._

And with that, Kara’s head snapped at the stage as she saw Lena walk into view. All her attention was focused on the woman in front of her and it was as straight as laser. She was aware that there was a large crowd of people around here but she didn’t seem to care. Many eyes were looking at Lena but she was happy to be sitting somewhere near the stage because she found Lena looking at her.

Shared eye contact rather.

And the other people no longer mattered. She gave Lena a small nod as a gesture of good luck and the brunette smiled at her and nodded back. Like it was an understanding that she knew that Kara was there for her. Not as a reporter but as a friend.

“Over the course of years, we have all been blessed with medical miracles that have shaped the future of medical practices and procedures. Vaccines, anesthesia, antibiotics are the medical miracles that we currently have access to.”

Kara looked at Lena the whole time that she was delivering this speech. She was so excellent and she looked very elegant in the dress that she wore that made it hard for Kara to focus on what she was saying. Good thing she has her recorder ready with her.

“We at L-Corp have been working on what we had hoped to be the fourth medical miracle that can help not only National City but the whole world. After a few years of attempting and working, we are proud to announce that we were able to crack the code into succession.” Lena said with all the confidence that she has.

The younger Luthor walked over to the middle of the stage where a camera focused to some kind of scalpel. She saw Jess come into the picture holding something like a metal box and came to Lena’s side.

She saw that Lena got the scalpel and she wounded herself using it and it proved to be deep with all the blood that was going out of her palms. Kara’s first instinct was to rush towards Lena but she stopped before she was about to get up when she saw Jess open the box and tiny looking particles came into view and went to Lena’s palm covering the wound.

She did not expect what she saw afterwards.

When the tiny particles were gone, so was Lena’s wound.

_What in the world?_

_Lena made that? She made that thing possible?_

She knew that Lena was smart. Hell, she felt inadequate after she interviewed Lena and learned about all the degrees and the accomplishments she was able to contribute and make at this young age.

But this was a new level of cool. This was amazing and mind blowing.

_Golly, Lena’s so smart and beautiful it hurts._

Kara thought to herself.

“I present to you, the fourth medical miracle that we have worked so hard for. We aim to change the world with it in a good and helpful way.”

Kara saw Lena looked at her smiling. She had never felt so proud in her entire life. She was so proud of Lena.

“We present, BioMax.”

And loud cheers were heard from around the place.

\---

“Lena!” Kara called out. The press conference was finished and Lena was out greeting her guests. When she saw Kara, her face turned to a great smile and Kara saw her excused herself from the ones she was talking to.

“Kara, hey.” Lena said and gave her a slow hug.

“Lena, that was so amazing.” She said without preamble. “How are your hands?”

“They’re good. I’m glad that you were able to make it.”

“Of course! I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Not after that one! That was so amazing!” Kara said beamingly at her friend. “I know you are the smartest person that I know but what you were able to accomplish was so cool.” She paused. “You were so cool, Lena.”

“It wasn’t all me you know. I have a great team.” She saw the brunette blush but didn’t pointed it out. Lena was too humble for her own good.

“But still I want you to know that I am proud of what you were able to do. You’re really amazing, Lena Luthor.” She said genuinely. Her heart was swelling with how she admires Lena.

“That—that means a lot to me, Kara. Thank you so much.”

“You make this world a better place and I hope that you know it.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Lena smiled shyly and Kara was lost in that small smile.

“I’ll leave you to it then. You seem busy. You’re just really amazing Lena.” She gave Lena a squeeze in the hand and Lena squeezed her hand back.

She was about to leave but she didn’t want to waste the opportunity to have a moment with Lena.

_Here goes nothing._

“Hey, uhm. Do you—would you want to have dinner with me?” She asked.

“Dinner?”

“Yeah, dinner.” She fixed her glasses out of habit and _nerves._ Definitely the nerves. “You know to celebrate your big win here.”

“Of course, sure.” Lena said shyly. “That would be lovely.”

“Great. I’ll call you?” Kara said while her nervousness vanished all of a sudden.

“Sure. I’ll see you around, Kara.”

And Lena walked away but gave Kara one last glance. She wasn’t aware that the brunette was having a hard time covering her red face after she turned around.

_Oh boy._

\---

If she was certain of one thing. She was sure that Lena was a great woman.

So, she wanted to make sure that she treats Lena right. So here she was four in the afternoon browsing the internet of the places that she can bring Lena to celebrate the launch of BioMax. She wanted to show Lena that she deserved a nice night out because of all the hard work that she had done.

“What’s got you so worked up there?” She saw Winn came into view.

“Nothing. I’m just looking for a good restaurant to eat.” She answered not taking her eyes of the screen of her laptop.

“You eating alone or are you eating with someone?” He continued asking as he took the seat beside Kara and glanced over to the laptop to see what his friend was currently looking at.

“I’m celebrating with Lena on the BioMax launch.” Winn gave her weird look. “You should have been there Winn. It was so amazing, I wanted to make sure that we get to celebrate it properly.”

“Just the two of you?”

“Yep.”

“In a very expensive restaurant?”

“Uh huh.”

"And you two just friends?" 

"She's a great friend." She heard Winn snort and she shot him a curious look. 

“Sure. Whatever you say, Kara.”

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” She shoved Winn.

“Look, I’m not saying that I know things, but I do see things Kara.” He says dragging his seat back to were it originally was. “I’m just saying that, I think you know that it’s just not to celebrate the whole launch thing.”

She raises her eyebrows. She can’t quiet make it look that way Lena does. It was a pathetic attempt so she stopped it.

“I just want to treat her nice. It’s been a tough time for her that’s for sure. Good gestures.”

“Friendly ones?” Winn asked again.

_Pause_.

“Totally friendly.”

“Kara.”

“What?”

“This is not a friendly dinner.” He teased and Kara groaned. “Drop it Winn.” She said with no bite.

“You know you can talk to me, right? I’m like the best, best friend ever!”

“I know, but there is nothing to talk about.”

“My dear friend. I can see the way you look and talk about Lena. You know I love to hear you talking but it’s nauseating sometimes.”

“I don’t talk about her that much!” She defended herself.

“Not sure about that, Champ. Remember the first time you saw her on the elevator?”

Kara recalled what seemed to have happened during that time.

***

_“Winn! You’ll never believe this!”_

_“What?” She made sure to shake Winn’s chair as an extra effort to get his attention._

_“I just saw Lena Luthor. And god, she is so beautiful I almost fainted.”_

_“Not a good joke, Kara.”_

_“Hey, it’s true! I really saw her. Remember Sam told me to do an interview on her? I’ll even talk to her in a few minutes!”_

_“I was talking about the faint part you idiot.” Winn doesn’t normally scold Kara but when he does, she gets the point._

_“Sorry about that.” She chuckled. “I’m so nervous right now because she looks so perfect.”_

_***_

Kara blushed at the recalled memory and she saw Winn with a funny expression. “Now you’re done with your trip to memory lane, need I say more?” He teased. “And remember the time that you finished your interview with her and the time you went to lunch with her and Sam and the other lunches that you two were in, and the…” His voice came out muffled as Kara brought her hands to his mouth while looking around if people had heard him.

“Shut up, Winn.” She glared at him. “What’s your point?”

“I’m just saying that you, my friend.” He gestured to Kara, “…have a gay crush on Lena Luthor.”

She huffed and made sure to not remove her glare from Winn. “I do not!”

“Suit yourself, Kara.” He said. “But I think you should take her to the place by the 31st street. There’s a great Italian restaurant there. Perfectly fine for platonic dinners.” He teased and ran away from the pen that Kara threw his way.

\---

Kara went home that day thinking about what Winn was talking about. She plopped herself at the couch rubbing her head. She was more concerned with what Winn told her rather that what Snapper gave her as a deadline.

Sure.

Lena was smart.

She was beautiful.

Confident.

Brave.

Witty.

Generous.

Caring.

And amazing was recently added today on the pile list of what makes Lena Luthor. Thinking about Lena was not something she was doing out of habit. It just happens naturally for her, but she can’t like Lena.

They were friends and they were good at friends.

She enjoyed Lena’s company and certainly, she was attractive and definitely Kara’s type of women but she can’t like Lena that way.

It was safe to say that Lena was someone who makes her extremely happy and someone that she cares about. She wanted to make sure that she would give Lena what she needs, help her the best way that she can, protect her from pain and hurt and treat her great.

That’s what friends does. She does it to a lot of people.

But as she was thinking, she was also sure that there was something about Lena that made her actions towards the brunette distinct.

She wondered where she was and how she was doing most of the free time that she has. She looked forward to their meetings and there was no dull moment with her. She can just watch Lena talk and walk all day. She admired Lena with all the excellence that she exudes and that was because Lena deserved it.

Yeah.

Maybe Lena is smart.

She was beautiful.

Confident.

Brave.

Witty.

Generous.

Amazing.

.

.

.

.

Has a great set of eyes.

Perfectly shaped jawline.

A great body.

Kissable lips.

_Wait, what?_

“Oh, no.” Kara got up from her couch.

“I like Lena Luthor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully I'll be able to update sooner. I'm enjoying this story so far even though the news about the final season of Supergirl was announced. Let's all hope that the writers will ditch canon and give us the OTP that we all deserve! 
> 
> Tell me what you think <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is a continuous cycle. It doesn’t end because they’re gone. It just goes on, but with new additives. Even better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter for you all.   
> I'm really excited about the story and it's progress. I have planned it all out but I'm not sure how many chapters so I just go with the flow. 
> 
> I hope y'all like this one. 
> 
> PS. I wasn't able to proof read a lot on this one. Sorry for the mistakes in advance. Haha.

All she wanted to do was to make sure that she would make the world a better place. Growing up, it has been her dream to make medical advancements to help the people not only around her but all around the world. It has been hard at first. She was young and she didn’t know how to start but she was thankful for all the support that her family and friends had given her.

She took a deep breath and gave herself a quick pep talk.

_“You can do this, Lena. You’ve done this lots of times already.”_ She said like a broken record.

She was still internalizing when she heard the familiar knock on the door.

“Ms. Luthor, you’re up in 5 minutes.” Jess came into view.

“Thank you, Jess.” She smiled but the nervousness was still there and her eyes were now closed. She was trying to collect herself.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and saw Jess looking at her intently. “Lena. I know you’re nervous but you don’t have to be. You are prepared for this. You worked your ass out for this and the world deserves to know how brilliant you are and by extension the team.”

She looked at Jess intently in the eye and like clockwork, she lifted her chin pushed her back to a straight posture and squared her shoulders. She was the CEO of L-Corp. She can do this, and she will do it excellently.

“That’s more like it.” Jess gave her a sweet and proud smile. “Let’s go?”

She gave Jess a bigger smile and all her confidence was back. “Let’s.”

\---

She was greeted by a large sea of people and suddenly all her nerves are back. If there was one thing that she was good at, it was to cover up what she was feeling inside and make sure that she still shows excellence and confidence despite her brain melting.

This was the make or break of the medical era.

_I can do this._

_I worked hard for this._

_I am brilliant._

She made sure to repeat these words as she walked to the center of the stage. Her nerves sky rocketed from 0 to 60 when she was placed at the middle of the stage.

There was silence.

But amidst the silence, she found a familiar set of blue eyes that she had been thinking about lately. All the people around her had seem to vanish but those blue eyes that she has been staring at seemed to stay. All the nervousness had gone when she saw Kara in the sea of people. Looking at her with those beautiful set of eyes and that calming smile. She smiled back and stared at Kara more for a while to gain a bit of confidence. If she was doing this, she needed all the confidence she was going to get it.

Even if it means staring at Kara for a few more moments.

Kara gave her a nod and in the silence that filled the room. She understood what it meant.

_You can do this, Lena. Good luck._

She got the message and that nod seemed to do the trick.

“Over the course of years, we have all been blessed with medical miracles that have shaped the future of medical practices and procedures. Vaccines, anesthesia, antibiotics are the medical miracles that we currently have access to.”

And then she went on and on, getting the strength from only one person.

_I can do this._

\---

Lena never needed all the compliments she received. As far as she was concerned, she knew that the launch would be a success despite all the nerves that she was feeling all the way. But when Kara gave her the compliment, she was elated.

All the other compliments she heard today would never compare to how Kara described her.

She heard how amazing she was, brilliant, smart. But what stuck to her was…

_“You were so cool, Lena.”_

Lena was a lot of things but she was sure that no one had ever called her cool. So, when Kara invited her for dinner, all she can do was say yes. She was glad that Kara excused herself and made her go back to all the post-launch talking that she was currently doing because she didn’t want Kara to see the blush that was creeping up at her face.

Later that day, she went home and sat at her couch thinking about all that have happened.

Over the course of the year, a lot has changed since Andrea was gone.

She had been through a lot of grief and it wasn’t easy. She remembered the times that she would have herself drunk just to be able to sleep. How Lex begged her to try and go out again. How she managed the L-Corp center at France because she needed to go away for a while. How she managed to gain herself back from the broken woman that she was.

And then there was the time that she came back.

It was not an easy thing to do. If you would ask her before all these things had happened, she wouldn’t want to go back, but she didn’t really have a choice. But if you were to ask her now, she was glad that she was back.

Sam was there to be with her, Lex and her mother were supportive and most of all, Kara.

Sweet, caring and very optimistic Kara Danvers. Lena looked back at all the times that she was with Kara They were all good memories and gave her happiness. But deep down, she was starting to think if it was unfair to actually feel something for the blonde.

She knew that she needed to move on at some point. She was doing that. She was doing it greatly, but a part of her didn’t want to let go. She glanced over to the side table and found a picture of her and Andrea.

It was a picture taken on the day that Andrea had proposed to her.

They looked so happy and young. She remembered how Andrea was so nervous she almost choked on her own drink when they were having dinner. It was just so simple.

A promise of forever, a lifetime. A promise of staying together and loving each other for all of their lives. They had been good promises, but truth was none of them were kept.

She took the photo and took a look at Andrea’s face. She didn’t feel the tear that escaped her eye.

“Hi, love.” She said in a whisper. “Did you know that I did it? I was able to launch BioMax and it was brilliant. They loved it.” She touched Andrea’s face. She wished that she was able to still do that. “Are you proud of me? I hope you are, you know. I made it this far because you were one of the people that supported me. You made me feel that I can do it and now, I did it.” She choked.

“I did it and you’re not here with me to celebrate it.” She cried a little harder. There was just silence.

“I really hate you, you know?” _Pause._ “How can you be gone when I’m having all of this. I don’t know how to do all these without you. But you cheated and left me all alone. I hate you!” She said harsher this time and she just cried. “If you were here, I wouldn’t feel so confused right now.”

“I’m so confused right now, love.” She said in a whisper, finding solace on the quietness of the room. “I love you, and I know that you’re gone and not coming back but, I can’t let you go. Not when all I have is memories of you.”

“I just wish you were here. Can you come back to me?” She remembered saying these words lots of times. If only it were that easier, she thought. If only it can be done.

“I met someone you know.”

Her thoughts came back to Kara. What if Andrea was here? Would they be friends? Would they have the same interests? All these came flooding into her mind. Imagining a world where Kara and Andrea both.

“I think you would love her.”

Her phone beeped and she received a message that she was kind of waiting for the whole day.

_How does Friday evening sound? Say, 7PM?_

And just like that, a part of her confusion fades away.

_Sure. See you, Kara._

_\---_

It wasn’t like she was excited or something. She just didn’t want to be late and wanted to give a great impression on Kara. She had told Sam about her dinner with Kara and her friend was more than happy to cover for her and kicked her out of the office so she can get ahead of herself and make sure that she was dressed nicely.

Lena had to admit that it was hard to pick up an outfit. All Kara said was that she had a reservation for them at a nice Italian restaurant and told her to dress as she pleases. So, Lena settled for a laced black long-sleeved cocktail dress. This was simple, but she made sure that she still looked good.

She wasn’t trying to impress Kara.

This was just a dinner celebration with a friend.

A friend that she has a _slight_ crush on.

No big deal.

Going back to the present where she was currently entering the restaurant, she was guided by the waiter to their reserved table and she was not surprised that Kara was there as well.

_She’s earlier than me. Or am I late?_

She glanced at her watch and saw that no. She wasn’t late. Kara just happened to beat her at the early bird record holder. She takes her time to appreciate what Kara was wearing while she wasn’t looking at her yet.

Kara wore a nice white long-sleeved dress shirt that was folded to her arms which showed her toned guns. The shirt was tucked into her black chinos. She looked like a model and Lena took her time to walk towards where the blonde was seated.

The blonde must have felt her presence because she glanced over to where Lena was and stood up like the real gentlewoman that she is.

“Lena. It’s lovely to see you.” Kara greeted her. Lena smiled at the waiter and thanked him for escorting her to the table. “Wow, you are a vision.”

Her cheeks were now in a shade of red because of the way Kara complimented her. It was unfair how she always feels that way when Kara says something nice to her. “You look dashing.” She said back.

“Well, I try. This is a fancy restaurant. I wouldn’t want to make a fool out of myself.” She joked and she assisted Lena into sitting down.

“Do you have any idea how good you look?” She couldn’t help but wonder. Kara was too humble for her own good.

“Well, I don’t want to talk about me. This night is about you and what you did. It has been a few days but I’m still hungover the fact that you were able to create BioMax.” The blonde said without missing a beat.

“Thank you, Kara. That really means a lot.”

“You were incredible up there. Believe me when I say that seeing you do your thing live is different from TV. It’s so cool.” Kara beamed.

“TV?” Lena asked.

“Yeah.” Kara shrugged. “You know, when we were doing your week-long interview, I was only seated beside you. Before I met you, I’ve seen you on television too. My mom’s a huge fan of your work. She mentioned about reading on of your journals.”

“Really?” Lena can’t help but be happy that someone out there was really interested to read about her journals. Don’t get her wrong, she knew she was brilliant, but most people only want to see when it’s accomplished and how to make profit but there are a few who is really into learning and wants to cure their curiosity.

“Yeah. I maybe a writer but I like science stuff too. So, seeing you do it in front of me than on the TV, definitely one of the amazing highlights of my life.”

Lena felt the genuine way Kara said it. It was simply said and she was sure that she was about to cry if she didn’t get a hold of herself.

“I don’t usually enjoy talking in front of a lot of people you know.” She said in a small voice.

“What? Are you sure? You were really amazing up there.” The blonde countered.

“Let’s just say that something helped me with the nerves and all of that.” She wasn’t ready to tell Kara that she was the reason why she was able to finish the whole presentation without collapsing. She’s not sure if she can ever say it.

“Well, I’m glad you were able to finish it.” The reporter said. “Let’s order?”

Lena smiled and looked at her menu. She spared a quick glance over to Kara who seemed concentrated on what she was going to eat. She has that crinkle when she seems to focus on something. Lena had picked this up long when they were doing the interview. She found the crinkle cute.

As the waiter came into view, Lena couldn’t help but just relax at this moment with Kara. It was nice to be out with a friend. It was a new thing for her specially that she didn’t really had the time when she came back to go on friendly dinners.

Most of the time, she ate with investors or her board members and even with Lex. She wanted to enjoy and savor the moment. Kara thanked the waiter when he excused himself to get their orders.

“This is out of record. I want you to know that I am not here as a reporter, although technically you’re my boss but I just want to know though that I really find it amazing as your friend. How long have you been working on BioMax before you were able to finish it?”

Lena appreciated that Kara said it. Yes, although Kara was with CatCo, Lena didn’t like it when she was asked with these like an ambush interview. She was happy that Kara wanted to make sure that she was here celebrating as a friend and not getting an insider scoop for the product.

“Well, I have been working on it since I was in grad school actually. Pretty much, 5 years to say the least?”

“Wow, that is a really long time. Imagine all the braincells you’ve burned just because of that.” Kara said in a serious tone. Lena finds it hilarious and she gave Kara a small laugh in return.

“You have no idea. I remembered when there was a time that I almost made the lab explode because I was trying to decode what needs to be done to make it function correctly. Instead of making it work, I actually made it blow up.” She said laughing at the memory.

Kara was laughing too. “I’m glad you’re doing much better now though. How did your team react to the explosion?”

“They took it well. It comes with the job. But Andrea was furious.” She said smiling at the memory. “I went home that day with a burned shirt and she banned me from going to the lab for a week. Saying that I can crack the code at home. No need to make explosions of any sort.”

She didn’t notice the way Kara tensed at the mention of Andrea’s name. She glanced at the blonde and Kara was just smiling at her. “I bet she was just worried about you.” Kara paused. “I’d be worried too if I were there, but luckily you made it through the explosion.”

She was glad that the waiter came in to serve their food. She didn’t really know what to say to Kara after that and the blonde didn’t seem to mind.

They enjoyed their food and silence and complimented the food. The topic seemed to get away from earlier and they were just back to talking about how their week has been. It was always an easy conversation with Kara. When Lena talks about science, the blonde really seemed to be interested and wasn’t even faking it. She would also throw out her thoughts and ideas and it amazes Lena that Kara was smart too.

Not only pretty, but smart.

That’s a great package.

“Lex usually drags me, so I learned how to play at the tender age of 5.”

“A business woman, certified genius, and definitely a chess master. Need I say more?” Kara gestured over to Lena. “I thought I had a lot of good traits, now I feel like my life is a lie until I met you.”

Lena laughed at how ridiculous Kara sounded.

“You sell yourself too short.” She countered.

“Nope, you’re just hard to beat.” Kara teased her.

They ended the night pretty late. Lena didn’t notice but they it was almost 9PM when they exited the restaurant.

“Let me call my driver so he can drop us both.” Lena offered Kara.

“No, I actually borrowed Alex’s car. She’s on night duty so I got the chance to drive. I can drive you home if you’d like?”

“Kara, I wouldn’t want to take too much of your time. It’s alright. I can just wait for my driver.”

“I insist. I know you’re and I don’t want you to wait for your driver anymore. Besides, I enjoyed talking to you so I really don’t mind.”

Once again Lena was caught off guard with how sincere Kara sounded. She noticed that it was one of the many traits she liked about Kara. She was always true. She relented and allowed Kara to drive her home.

It was an easy ride. They talked a few times more and just like that Kara was parked over to her apartment building. If she’ll be honest, she didn’t want the night to end between her and Kara and before she can stop herself, her mouth already worked on its own.

“Would you like to get a drink?”

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to take too much of your time.” Lena smiled at how Kara mimicked her from earlier.

“Come on, Kara.” The blonde saw her as she rolled her eyes in a fond way.

The elevator ride was quiet but not in an uncomfortable way. Lena was thankful that she was a tidy person and her apartment was clean when she left. This is her first time to invite Kara over to her penthouse and she was nervous about it.

She knew that a person house is a reflection of what makes a person and she didn’t want to give Kara a wrong impression. Her troubles seemed to have gone away when Kara stepped inside at her door and was in awe of the clear view of the city from the windows.

“Wow, Lena. This is an amazing view.” Kara said gaping. She was by the windows at this point and her hands were in her pockets. Lena was faced by Kara’s back and the blonde seemed to enjoy the view that was in front of her. “If I had money like yours then I’d pay for this view too.”

“This is the best view of the city. I got this ever since I started working at L-Corp.” She said walking towards the kitchen. She needed to step away from Kara because her back was alluring. Lena felt the urge to hug her from behind so she needed to step away. This crush was not helping her to say the least. “Coffee, tea, or wine?”

“I’ll have tea.” Kara said politely as she walked towards the kitchen and sat at one of the stools. Lena made her tea and she poured herself a generous amount of red wine. Kara didn’t seem to mind so she opted for wine.

“You have a lovely home, Lena.” The blonde said while taking in her surroundings. She saw the way Kara paused for a while before she asked a question. “Was this your house with Andrea?”

Lena was not sure how to feel with how Kara asked it. She didn’t feel like it was an intrusive question. But it felt wrong to talk about Andrea with Kara in a way that she can’t really explain. She wished Kara didn’t asked because she was now back to that confused feeling.

She answered still to not leave Kara hanging. “No, we actually have a place that we bought before anything else.” She said sipping on her wine a little too much.

“Oh. I’m sorry if I asked. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable you know.”

“No, its okay.” She said taking another sip. “I actually haven’t talked about Andrea in a while. Or I haven’t been talking about her to someone at all.”

It was true. Although she knew that her family and friends was always there to listen to her, she never really wanted to talk about Andrea. Only small things about her but not the way that she misses her or the way she still grieves her from time to time.

Not that she didn’t want the company but she felt that she needed to do that in order to move on.

“Can I ask why?” The reporter asked as she poured herself some tea.

Lena thought about it. “I don’t know. I just feel like it would help about not talking about her if I have to move on and forget about her. I still miss her from time to time, you know.”

“Ever since she died, I always deflected any attempt from my family and friends about how I feel.” She didn’t know why but she found it easy to tell Kara all of this. Maybe it was because Kara didn’t know Andrea or shew as a stranger from their story. But if felt good to talk about it. “I just say that I’m doing good and I’m okay but truth is that I just wish that she was still here.”

“Earlier this week, I wondered if maybe, just maybe. If I was able to finish BioMax on time, would it be a reason for her to live? Would I have been able to save her? But all of those would just remain a question because she’s not here anymore. I wish that I was smarter before and would have finished it then. She might still have a chance.”

She felt Kara move her hand and touched hers in an attempt of comfort. She appreciated the gesture and gave Kara a sad smile as she poured herself another drink. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make this a sad night.”

“It’s okay, Lena.” Kara assured her. “You don’t have to be sorry about it. I understand how you feel. But I hope you don’t make it too hard on yourself.”

Kara sipped her tea and gave Lena a sad look. “You can move on and not forget about her. I realized that when I lost my parents.”

“Oh, Kara. I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” She had known Kara for quite a while. She always talked about her family. Mentions of Alex, and Eliza but she didn’t know that she was adopted. There was a familiar feeling that resonated with her.

Kara gave her a smile and mouthed a silent _it’s okay_ and continued. “I thought that I needed to forget them for me to move on with my life. Being adopted, I wanted to be better for my new family and I wanted to forget the pain of losing mine. So, like you I don’t talk much about them or I never really processed the loss because it was too much and I wanted to get that hurting feeling out. The faster I forget, the better it is for me.”

The blonde was now playing with the tea cup. “But one day Eliza talked to me and what she told me actually made sense.”

“What did she say?”

“She told me that it’s okay to process the grief and to want to continue loving them even though they were gone. Losing them was hard and it was difficult to go by, but it would be better if all the happy memories stayed because it will make us remember that for a while, we knew how it felt to be loved by the people that we have lost. And it will be easier because at least until the very end, you were loved even if it was taken away from you.” Kara said smiling at the memory. “I remembered when she told me that, I really didn’t understand what she meant. But then I realized that she was right. It was hurting me to want to forget them because I loved them so much. So, I stopped trying to pretend that I forgot them and accepted the fact that they will always hold a special place in my heart.”

“That even thought they were gone, the new ones that come after they went away won’t ever replace them but would just continue to love me that way they did. Love is a continuous cycle. It doesn’t end because they’re gone. It just goes on, but with new additives. Even better.” Kara sighed. “I started to process things and from there, it became easier for me to move on. I just moved on, but I didn’t forget them. They don’t deserve to be forgotten you know. You shouldn’t try and forget Andrea to move on.”

Lena was crying. What Kara said was partly how she felt. Wanting to move on from the loss of Andrea had been making her hurt because she wanted to forget.

“Don’t forget Andrea, Lena. Just move on and let her go. But you can still remember her in a way that would remind you of all the happiness that was in there. You deserve that.” Kara said as she held Lena’s hands to give another sort of comfort to a crying Lena.

“Thank you, Kara. That really means a lot to me.” She said wiping her eyes from the remnants of her tears. Kara moved over to her side of the bar and sat on the stool beside her. Lena was glad that Kara gave her extra comfort by allowing her to just rest her head on her shoulders.

It was nice and it felt good. Having Kara here. She knew that in this moment, this had opened a new level into their friendship.

She didn’t know what it was but she didn’t want to think too much.

This was a great moment.

_Love is a continuous cycle. It doesn’t end because they’re gone. It just goes on, but with new additives. Even better._

.

.

.

It’ll be better, she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the lovely comments last time guys.   
> They make my heart full. I just have a lot of time now so I want to move forward with the story. I really hope I can update more often once I get to be busy again. But still, thanks for the support. 
> 
> Leave me comments so I know what you think about. <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tension begins...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter for you all!   
> I had a hard time doing this chapter because I wanted to make sure that I'm able to share what I want to happen.   
> There might be a few errors because I wasn't able to reread. 
> 
> Enjoy!

It was clear as day. Kara knew that she liked Lena. Falling for her even maybe but it was not hard to. Not when she remembered how Lena’s head felt in her shoulders that night that she saw Lena became so vulnerable with her feelings. Not when they were lost in their own bubble and talked their hearts out. It was a special moment.

_It was a great night._ The best that she had in a long time. Maybe Winn was right, maybe the dinner was not just to celebrate Lena’s success, but also make Lena feel good. She didn’t want to make it a date, but in her head, she sure hoped that it was a romantic date even if in the end, all Lena could do was think about Andrea.

Andrea.

Of course, she was in the picture. Lena was with Andrea and clearly, she still loved her too even after she was gone. She was still grieving and she missed her. How can Kara compete to that? Lena was way out of her league anyways even if she you take away the whole Andrea thing.

Firstly, she was rich for goodness sake. Kara isn’t poor though; in fact, she was also secured as a child. Her parents may have died but they did make sure to leave her a sum of money enough to make it through college and keep her even while she was not working due to recovery.

But Lena was filthy rich. Andrea was too. Good lord she was also a CEO. So, she’s a complete flop on that department. But the beautiful thing about Lena was that even though she was rich, it never was an issue for her. She was smart with how to use them and she makes sure that she uses if for good. She was not a spoiled brat and definitely not snobbish like other rich women.

Second, Lena was so smart. Kara wasn’t dumb that’s for sure but Lena’s degree shines through and she can’t help herself but be in awe of how truly brilliant the youngest Luthor was. Kara only had one masters degree that made her resume good look if she ever applies for a job but with Lena’s degrees and masters and PhD’s she’s sure that her resume would not only sparkle but would definitely sky rocket.

All the great things that Lena did was all because of the kind of mind that she had. Add the big amount of determination she has and there you have it folks, an impossible thing made possible by one and only Lena Kieran Luthor.

_She felt dumb alright._

And lastly, back to the original reason why she was sulking on a good day was because she knew that even if she liked Lena, the brunette would not like her back because she still long for Andrea. Add in the other reasons but this was the nail to her coffin. Lena would never notice her, not with Andrea being in her heart.

After their talk the last time, it was clear as day that Lena still longed for her. A part of her was not done hurting although she claims that she’ll get better. She felt sad for Lena that time. It was hard to lose somebody and she knew that for a fact. She knew that losing her parents were different than Lena’s loss.

She was ready to spend her life with Andrea. They had plans and bought a house together for goodness sake and all in a snap it was taken away from her. Her happiness left a hole in her heart that can’t be fixed.

She didn’t even have it in her heart to try. It was unfair for Lena.

Kara knew that what Lena needed was a friend, and that’s what she’ll be. Hell, she be the best if that would make Lena happy. She can be a friend. She was good at it. She can win a trophy for being a great friend.

She went back to her laptop and finishes what she needed to before Snapper—

“Ponytail!”

She rolls her eyes.

\---

So, there she goes being the good friend that Lena needs.

She continues to spend time with her through lunch, frequent texting and everything that a good friend does. But it doesn’t help her case. As the time goes by, she finds herself frequenting Lena’s office and spends lunch there. Making time for Lena and _subtly_ taking care of her was just so easy for Kara to do. Her feelings aside, she knew that Lena deserved to be treated well.

She feels guilty though, while her intentions are pure, her motivations are not. But she continues. She can’t stop anymore. Not when Lena was giving her smiling eyes that makes her heart drop every time that she sees her coming. Not when Lena was being so openly vulnerable with her and talks about what she really feels.

Not when Lena was so strikingly beautiful and she’s just being pulled to her like she was a magnet.

She tells Alex about Lena one time but she leaves out the feelings that she has for the brunette. It was just nice to talk to her sister about these things but she can’t bring herself to tell her that. Not yet at least but Alex was glad that she gained another friend through Lena and by extension Sam.

Having feelings for Lena was not hard. It was hardly a problem. She has it under control most of the time, but sometimes she just wishes that she doesn’t feel that way. Not when Winn was being Winn.

Winn was always bugging her about it. Pointing out things that makes it harder to ignore her feelings for Lena. She told him how she felt for the young CEO after she had the dumb realization days ago, and Winn was rather so smug about it. He would pester her into diving into the moment and try to make a move which she strongly declines.

_I didn’t tell you about my feelings to ask advise on how to do it Winn. I told you that in complete confidence that you would try to talk me out of it._

But her friend just continues on giving her reasons why she should do it.

Like today. They were working outside and it was for a change of scenery as Winn suggested. They all needed it and to make it better, they were able to drag James along with minimal refusal.

“You’re not making any sense at all, Kara.” He rolls his eyes.

“It makes perfect sense.” She counters.

“I’m not saying now. I’m just saying that you need to up your game if you want to graduate from the friendzone department.”

“I am not _friendzoned_ Winn. I am a friend. That’s all and I declare that myself, not her.”

“But you would totally like to date her, like date, date her, right? You’re a grown woman Kara. It’s about time you do something nice for yourself. You deserve to be happy.”

“I am happy and I am good with what we have. No need to make a move because I have it under control, thank you very much.”

Winn was about to say something when they heard a loud sigh from James’ corner of the table.

“Shut up both of you, or I’ll call Snapper myself and tell him that you both are out here not really doing both of your jobs.” James said looking at them through his laptop.

“Snapper isn’t my direct boss, you know. Kara will be the one in trouble if you do that.” Winn states. Yep, he was the IT guy. No direct boss. He was the boss of his department.

James eyed them even more and closes his laptop. “Listen, you two.” He sighs. “Winn, stop terrorizing Kara. Her emotions are valid. You can’t keep pushing her into pursuing Lena. What you can do is to assure her that she has friends that she can run to when she needs one. Stop teasing her.”

_Ha! Take that Winn!_

Kara sticks her tongue out to Winn. Gosh, they were really like Kids. She had one this round and Winn will stop pestering her.

“And you, Kara. Winn also has a point.” He stares at Kara. “Stop putting yourself on the low here. I know you feel that you are not fit to be with Lena. I’m not saying that you should pursue her, friendship is a good start but don’t sell yourself short. You are a great person and she deserves you even if it’s just friendship between the two of you. But I do hope one day you’ll find the courage in you to go after how you feel.” He smiles warmly at her.

“See, I told you I was right.” Winn grins and Kara just groans. James shakes his head and continues what he was doing before he schooled the both of them. Just as she was about to go back to her laptop, she spotted a familiar brunette walking over to their way.

“Kara, I was about to call you.” Kara greeted Lena with a hug. Screw Winn and his grin. He was rather being smug at the moment. “I was about to ask you to have lunch with me but it seems that you’ve eaten already.”

“Yeah, it’s uhm, yeah. It’s a busy day. How about tomorrow then?” She says to the brunette fixing her glasses.

“That would be lovely. I’ll see you tomorrow then?” Lena was looking into her eyes and Kara was sure that she was a puddle. She heard Winn snort.

“Yeah. See you, Lena.”

“Goodbye, darling.” Lena said kissing Kara’s cheeks before leaving. She glances over to Winn and James. When Lena was out of view, Winn suddenly bursts into a full laugh.

“Oh my gosh. Kara, you should have seen your face. Seriously!” This earned him a kick on the shin when Kara was seated back. Winn stopped and nursed his bruised leg muttering something under his breath. When Kara looks at James, he was just staring at Kara clearly thinking about something.

“Are you alright, James?” This brings the man back to his original position before speaking.

“You know what Kara?” He said closing his laptop once again. Kara mouthed a silent ‘what’ to James and he just stared at her intently.

“I’m totally with Winn now and take back what I said. Cut the shit and just ask her out. She seems to be into you too.”

She glares at Winn when she saw him throw his fist into the air as a sign of victory and she slumps her head into the table. “Not you too!”

Winn and James laugh.

\---

“What are you up to lately?” Lena asks her. Just as Kara promised, she had lunch with Lena today and went to Lena’s office instead of eating outside. Besides _I was in the block Lena_ and it saved time. Lena didn’t mind though.

She told Lena of the other things that she had been covering and told her about one of the interviews that she was currently looking forward to. It was just so easy to talk to her because Lena really seemed to be interested in the things that she does.

“I’m doing an interview with Ray Palmer, CEO of Palmer Tech. He’s the guy from Star City and currently working on some kind of tech for military safety. I hope he makes it happen.” She answers sipping up her soda. “I hope he succeeds, really. That guy is so funny you wouldn’t believe that he’s all brainy. I bet people will love him.”

“You seem to be happy working with him? Is he single?” Kara was not sure if the question was asked out of curiosity or out of something else, but she wasn’t about to dive down to that idea. It was impossible. Lena can’t be jealous, but the shift on her voice was something.

She ignores it.

“What?” Kara snorted. “No. He looks like my cousin!” She stuffs the last piece of fry into her mouth. “And besides, I have my own favorite CEO. People also like her, but I—I love spending time with her.” She glances at Lena and she could have sworn that Lena’s cheeks were a different shade of pink right now. The air seemed to have changed in the room and Kara doesn’t like it. No, she was scared. She knew this, but she couldn’t help herself and she really doesn’t mind the slip up that she said. Not if Lena was looking at her like that.

With those lovely eyes that speaks right into her.

“Yeah?” Lena said in small voice taking her eyes away from Kara in a snap. Kara knew that she needed to do something to stir the conversation away from where it is now.

“Yeah, and besides. I believe you’re still smarter than him. He didn’t go to a boarding school in Ireland like you did. That’s your edge. And he didn’t have a punk rock phase like you did, so yeah. You’re better.” She says teasingly and Lena just laughs, throws a fry at her. That made it lighter.

“Okay, jerk.”

“I was kidding.” She said as she tried to lessen her laughter and reached out for Lena’s hand. “Truly, you are brilliant Lena. I hope you never forget that.” And Lena gave her a tight nod and smiled at her. That was enough for now. She got up and cleaned the mess that they made while eating to clear her mind. She needed to do something or else she might act on her feelings and regret the actions later.

“I’ll go ahead. I have a big interview to catch.” She said heading towards the door and Lena trailing behind her.

“Sure. Thanks for lunch, Kara. I’m really glad you came.” Lena said hugging Kara. The blonde couldn’t help herself so she just basked in the hug that Lena offered. She lingered for a while and wanted to make it last longer but she knew that she had to let go. It would be creepy not to.

But Lena was not letting go. She lingered into the shared hug that they had and Kara didn’t have it in her to break it. She was powerless when it comes to the younger Luthor.

“I’ll always be there for you. Lunches or not.” She said while they slowly part away from each other. In that moment, the shift that was there earlier came back and it seemed that it wasn’t going anywhere. She was looking at Lena who was currently in her normal height since she abandoned her killer heels during their lunch and the younger woman was looking at her outright too their faces seeming to be only a few inches apart.

She didn’t realize that her hands were still on Lena’s waist and Lena didn’t really seem to mind, who’s hands are currently making its way up to Kara’s neck. It was a quiet moment and Kara’s head was on a strike. She wanted to close the distance but she doesn’t want to do that but Lena was looking at her like she was waiting for something.

Slowly, oh so slowly she lowers her head to close the distance. Her brain was screaming for her to stop but her heart was just pushing her to just do it. And she draws herself closer when Lena closes her eyes like waiting in anticipation.

“Ms. Luthor, you’re 2PM is here.” Jess’ voice comes from the comms and Kara sprung away from Lena like she had been burned.

_What happened?_

_I almost kissed Lena._

_Oh. My. God._

Kara started to fidget at her glasses the awkward atmosphere was evident right now and she was drowning in it. “I should go.” She cleared her throat and rushed towards the door leaving an equally stunned Lena at the other side of the door.

_What have you done, Kara?_

\---

It had been 2 weeks since they last saw each other and Kara couldn’t bring it in herself to look at Lena after what happened 2 weeks ago. So then and there she decided that she was just busy. That was her excuse and she was going to stand by it. She needed to clear her head and make sure that if she sees her, she wouldn’t be doing something that she’ll regret.

But the woman was making it hard for her.

Lena continues to ask if her if they can both do lunch or dinner but most of them goes unanswered or she just says her now famous spiel _I’m currently having a lead with an article. Rain check?_ And she feels so guilty about it. Lena doesn’t deserve this and she knows it. But she still does it. Two weeks straight.

She’s being a coward.

And an asshole.

Yep. That sums up her behavior towards the younger Luthor. Just a couple more days and she’ll be fine. On top of it, Winn being Winn has been pestering her about why she feels so grumpy. She didn’t need to tell Winn about what happened because she knows that he’ll just continue to tell her to just go with it, one that she doesn’t really need right now.

No.

She’d rather keep it to herself for the time being. She slumps her head at the backrest of her chair and covers her eyes with her hands. She needed to rub out the stress and all the stupid feelings that she has. This article was killing her and her _stupid_ brain who keeps reliving the moment with Lena the last time they saw each other was torturing her. She needed a break or else she might break something.

_Knock. Knock._ She groans at the sound. _Stupid Winn and his stupid knocking antics._

_Knock. Knock._

She doesn’t get up from her chair and continues to bury her face in her hands. She knew that Winn would just barge in after failed attempts of an answer from her.

_Knock. Knock._

“Winn, I swear to god I will rip your hands off –” She says as she glares of the door of her office revealing not Winn.

She was met with green eyes. She jumps out of her seat and walks toward the brunette who was smiling shyly at her.

“Sorry, please don’t rip my hands off.”

Kara’s mouth formed an “o” shape and she was closing and opening it at the same time. She definitely looks like a fish right now so she resolves to laughing instead. “No, never. You’re not Winn. You’re safe.” She chuckles as she gives Lena a hug but just a quick one. If Lena found it strange how fast and awkward Kara was, she was kind enough not to point it out.

“What are you doing here? I mean not—I was not saying you’re not allowed her but I am happy that you’re here.” Kara was rambling and she needed to stop. She made a silent cough and gestured for Lena to sit down at her couch. “I’m happy to see you, sorry about all the mess.”

“It’s quite alright, Kara. I was just around the area and decided that I’d like to have lunch with my favorite reporter who seems to be busy these days.” Lena said affectionately but the sadness in her voice was there. Guilt punched Kara in the gut at the younger woman’s words. She didn’t mean to make Lena sad.

“I’m so sorry, Lena. I was really busy lately. But I’m glad you’re here. Of course, we can have lunch.” Lena’s eyes were sparkling again and _golly_ did she missed seeing those eyes. “Let me get my coat. My treat because I’ve been such a horrible friend lately.”

“I understand Kara. You don’t need to explain yourself to me or treat me to free lunch.” Lena said, she was looking down at her hands. “I just really missed you.” She added in a soft voice but the sadness was still there.

Kara’s head was in shambles. She was guilty of making Lena sad. She missed Lena too. She promised that even if she can’t be with Lena, she would be the friend that she always needed and Kara was so focused on keeping her feelings at bay that she forgot about this.

Screw her feelings. Lena missed her. She missed Kara’s friendship and she was now determined to make sure that she won’t hurt Lena in the process of ignoring her. “I’m really sorry for being MIA lately. I really missed you too.” And with that the smile on the brunette’s face was so bright Kara would do anything to keep it that way.

Even if it means to swallow her own feelings.

They went ahead with lunch and as promised, it was Kara’s treat. Lots of things were missed between the two. Over the course of 2 weeks, Kara filled Lena into what she has been doing and Lena did as well. Lena was able to completely launch BioMax and she had investors lining up to help her with the cause. She even said that Palmer Tech was interested in helping specially with reaching out to the communities that couldn’t afford it. It was a great cross from National City to Star City. Even STAR Labs from Central City showed their support with the project and it was a whirlwind from there.

Kara could have not been prouder of Lena. She was in her element.

The tension Kara feels when Lena was around seemed to go away. She was just happy to be around Lena’s presence and the brunette was sure to reciprocate how happy she is with Kara being around. It’s like nothing changed in the past 2 weeks.

_How did I miss this? How come I ignored all this._

After their lunch, Kara opted to walk Lena to her car. It was a good kind of silence.

Until it wasn’t.

“I thought you were ignoring me.” She stopped on her tracks when she heard Lena’s words. Her voice was soft and small, almost whisper like. “I felt like you didn’t want to be around me.”

She turned around and saw Lena standing a few meters away from her. “Lena…”

“Did I do something wrong, Kara?” Kara almost jumped at the question. How can she say that Lena didn’t do anything wrong? It was all her. It was her fault. She sighed and went to the raven-haired woman’s spot.

“No, you didn’t. I’m sorry that you felt that way.”

“Was it because of what happened last time? Did I cross a line?” Lena’s voice was a bit shaky. _Was she about to cry? Great job, Kara. Now you made her super sad._

“Lena. Believe me, you didn’t do anything wrong.” She said while she stopped in front of the young CEO. “There’s just a lot of things in my mind and I don’t want you to worry about me. But I promise, we’re good.”

She touched Lena’s hand and ran her thumb over it. “I wasn’t ignoring you. Not on purpose, if that helps.” She just continues to look at their hands. “I just have things that I need to do. I promise, I won’t do it again. I’m sorry, Lena.”

“I just really missed you. You’re one of my few friends, Kara. I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable last time. I didn’t mean to do it. I want us to move past things and forget about what happened. Move forward. I was being stupid and I’m really sorry.”

_There._

Kara was taken back to the reality. Of course, Lena wouldn’t mean it. It may have been just a spur of the moment. Kara was her friend and there may be tension between them during that time, but that’s the thing, Lena would never do that to Kara because they’re just friend and with Lena not meaning to do it just brings Kara to think that Lena would never want her back.

She actually wasn’t sure if she’s hurt with the fact that Lena didn’t mean to do it or relieved that they can just go back to being friends. As much as she wants to forget it ever happened, she can’t.

But as a friend, she didn’t want to be a burden to Lena anymore so she nods and smiles at the brunette.

“It’s okay. No harm done.”

“We’re good?” Lena asked and Kara smiled at how soft Lena is right now. She felt that Lena was just scared that Kara would be mad at her. She can be upset some other time but she was here as a friend.

“Always. So, don’t worry.”

Lena leapt and gave her a hug. She needed to make it up to the younger woman in her arms. “We have a game next Saturday and I hope you can come watch? Cheer Ruby?”

“Of course, darling. For my favorite team.” Lena grinned and Kara was sure that they were off to a great start again.

She may have gone home a bit upset, but she was sure that she will do anything in her power to make sure that Lena was happy. Her happiness be damned. After all, as long as Lena was happy, she would be too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tension continues...


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed writing this chapter so much.  
> Again, apologies for any error. I'll fix it some time <3

“I should go.”

That was the last thing she heard when she saw Kara went out of the door. What just happened?

_You almost kissed her!_ Or rather, she had almost allowed herself to be kissed. How that happened? She had no idea, but if you ask her why? Lena can give you an answer. It had dawned her that Kara was a force that she can’t resist.

Let it be known that her 2PM meeting did not go the way she wanted it to. Her mind was floating elsewhere, although it ended better than what she expected given her lack of attention because her mind was swept away by the thought of Kara’s lips oh so close to her a few moments ago. And all she could think about was how it made her heart skip. She longed for that feeling. Ever since Andrea, she longed for that connection with someone. Somebody that can make her knees weak just by saying the right words that she longed to hear.

_You’re amazing Lena._

_You’re so cool Lena._

_You deserve to happy._

_I’ll always be there for you._

Lena knew all of these, but ever since Andrea was gone, she had forgotten what it feels like being told these things in a way that doesn’t sound transactional. With Kara, it all felt like she was seen the way she wants to be.

After that night at her penthouse, she was certain that something in her heart had shifted and it was a shift that made it easier for her to acknowledge her growing feelings for Kara. The blonde telling her about her past was a something she wouldn’t dare to take advantage of. Deep down, during the moment that she was revealing her feelings to Kara, she felt as if she was unfair to her. Kara had celebrated the day with her and was very respectful of her. Every moment that they were talking and sharing stories, the blonde never failed to assure her that she was there for Lena. 

But all Lena did was compare Kara to Andrea in her head. It wasn’t intentional on her part but she can’t help but do it. It was a perfect night and before it all happened, she was rather confused of what to feel for the blonde. The way Kara had treated her that night was friendly to say but was also the way Andrea had treated her.

It was soft, calming and peaceful. It was a perfect night especially when she talked about Andrea and how it still hurts her. She had opened up herself to the reporter faster that anyone in her life because it was just so easy to talk to her.

What Kara told her gave her time to think about what she wants right now. The new ones wouldn’t replace the ones that were lost. Kara was right, but was that true about her feelings as well? Lena loved Andrea to the point that all of her was about Andrea.

She doesn’t want to replace Andrea in her heart she was sure of it, but does Kara’s presence in her life mean that she can actually do it again? Can she be with someone else? She needed to sort her feelings out and find out what she truly wants to happen between her and Kara.

But sorting her feelings didn’t mean she had to put Kara in the position to make a decision to kiss her right there and then. It wasn’t fair for Kara and she knows that now because here she is currently lacking her doze of sunshine because Kara is busy _again._

It was her mess so she needed to fix this. She knew that they crossed a line after that fateful incident on her office but there was no turning back. Maybe the saying was true that absence makes the heart frow fonder. Because a week after Kara was not answering her calls and not seeing the blonde, Lena can now say that from acknowledging her feelings for Kara, she had crossed the threshold of accepting the fact that she was falling for the blonde.

She longed to see those adorable eyes that crinkled when deep in thought and wanted to see that lovely smile that seems to take away all her worries. The assurances that everything will be fine coming from Kara was something that she was always looking forward too after a long dreadful meeting.

She missed the long strings of emojis of every text message that was sent to her. She was always a workaholic and it was Kara who pulls her away and reminds her to take care of herself. She missed the warmth of Kara’s hands around her when they hug when Kara arrives and before she leaves. Those words that always make sure to cheer her up and assure her that she was doing just fine.

She still gives Kara the benefit of the doubt. Kara won’t ignore her, right? Right. That’s what her heart was saying but her traitorous brain begs to differ. She was not happy about what happened and it was entirely Lena’s fault. But now, she believes that Kara was busy because she is still the boss at CatCo and she sees the reports happening there.

So, she waits another week.

Kara still gives her the same excuse and it was getting old. Lena is many things but stupid was not one of them. She doesn’t have it in her heart to be mad at how Kara was acting but she was sad. She wanted to sort this out and make sure that she didn’t ruin a great friendship that she was able to create in a few months. She thinks of ways on how to approach this, but all she can think about was to go to Kara herself and ask her for lunch. That easy.

But it wasn’t easy.

One minute she was ready to walk out her office door and then the other she was sitting back down in the couch. Why can’t she just go over there like a normal friend would do and ask what the hell happened to them. She misses Kara every day and she just want her friend back so she slumps herself back into the couch.

That’s how Lex sees her.

“What’s got you all gloomy?” He asked not bothering to knock. Jess might have told him that she was free. She sat back up and fixed herself to not look anymore stupid than she is feeling right now.

“Nothing, just a stupid board meeting.”

Lex crossed his arms and eyed her. “Lena, I’m part of the board. I wasn’t informed of a meeting.”

She smiles fondly at her brother to hide the busted look on her face and Lex sighs. “Okay, come on. Spill it out. What’s got you brooding on a lovely day?”

“I am not brooding!” She counters defensively.

“Lena, I’ve seen you grow. I literally know when you’re brooding.” He rolls his eyes. “And don’t tell me that board meeting crap.”

“It’s nothing Lex.” She sighs in defeat. Truth is, she doesn’t know what to tell her brother. Doesn’t know how to tell him, but a part of her was reeling to tell someone. Lex was her first best friend before Sam and after all that has happened to her, Lex was there along the way.

“You know you can tell me everything, you know.” Lex says walking closer to her and plants a hand on her shoulder. “I know you’re a grown up but I’d still like to know what’s up with you.”

“I’ll tell you when I’m ready.”

“Sure. I understand.” She feels herself pressed in a familiar warm hug and she sinks into it. She lets the hug linger a moment more before Lex gives her a sweet smile and pulls away.

“Why are you here exactly?” Lena asks.

“I’d love to say that I just wanted to check on you to show the best big brother in me.” He said chuckling and Lena rolls her eyes. “But I need to get some papers for the upcoming acquisition that we’re doing so I can review them with the lawyers.”

She smiles and hovers over to the side of her table that has the documents that Lex would be needing. “You go get ‘em Lex. I know you can make this happen.” Lena encourages her brother. She can see the bright smile on the elder Luthor’s face. It was really great to have Lex around, _healthy._

“Of course. That’s my job.” He teases. “If this doesn’t work, I’m sure that there are other opportunities for us. If there is one thing that I have learned during all the times that I failed or did something not worth fixing is that I can always go back and try again. Find a way to make it happen even if it terrifies me to fail and fail again.” Lena can feel the sincerity in her brother’s voice. He has come a long way.

“Chances won’t become possibilities if we don’t take the big step of making it happen. That’s why we get to take all the chances we can and make it work.” He adds as he scans the paper that was on his hands.

Lena ponders at the thought. Lex was right. She has to take chances.

She goes to CatCo and asks Kara for lunch.

\---

“I felt like you didn’t want to be around me.” Lena was so vulnerable at this point. The moment she saw Kara walk towards the parking lot; fear had crept into her saying that the blonde would disappear again. She needed to know if the reason for the absence was her stupid actions.

She takes the chance like Lex said. “Did I do something wrong, Kara?” She saw the way Kara had tensed at the sentence. Of course, Kara would say that she didn’t. She always assured Lena that she was always good with her. But she needed to know and she needed to do something about it.

“Was it because of what happened last time? Did I cross a line?” Her voice was shaky. She wanted to cry and pour out what she really was feeling. She had been terrified at the idea that Kara would run because of what happened. She didn’t want that. Not when Kara was the reason that she became happy again these days. Not when she finally admitted that she wanted Kara in her life and wanted to be with her. _Chance._ That’s what her head was working on.

She could have a chance with Kara but she needed to know what happened to them. She saw Kara walk towards her and touched her hand. It was their first intimate contact in weeks and it made Lena miss Kara even more. The hug at Kara’s office earlier had caught her off guard. It was quick and it was awkward, but she didn’t want to tell that to the reporter. She tried to hide the pained expression and she was thankful that Kara didn’t seem to notice, but feeling Kara’s hands into hers was something Lena had missed so dearly.

“Lena. Believe me, you didn’t do anything wrong. There’s just a lot of things in my mind and I don’t want you to worry about me. But I promise, we’re good.” Kara rubs her thumb across her hands. “I wasn’t ignoring you. Not on purpose, if that helps. I just have things that I need to do. I promise, I won’t do it again. I’m sorry, Lena.”

And Lena forgives her right then and there. She can say that there was more to what Kara was saying, but she wasn’t going to push it. A sliver of hope ebbed into her heart and she took all the _chances_ she needs to try and be brave. “I just really missed you. You’re one of my few friends, Kara. I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable last time. I didn’t mean to do it. I want us to move past things and forget about what happened. Move forward. I was being stupid and I’m really sorry.”

She saw the look on Kara’s face changed but she couldn’t point out what that expression is. Did she say something wrong again? But it was gone even before she can say anything about it.

“It’s okay. No harm done.” Kara says smiling at her. That smile that she misses the most. It didn’t reach her eyes like the usually do but maybe Kara was just deep in her thoughts.

She asked again just to make sure. “We’re good?”

“Always. So, don’t worry.” She couldn’t help but hug Kara with the happiness that she feels.

They had a soccer game on Saturday. Great way to make it up to the blonde.

\---

It was Friday night and she was currently sleeping over at Sam’s house at her friend’s insistence so they can go to Ruby’s match tomorrow afternoon and have lunch before leaving. Ruby to her credit was so excited that she gave them a look on her soccer uniform that night which was really cute in her.

“I’ll make sure that I’ll play a good game tomorrow.” She was sure that she saw a little bit of Sam in there. Determined and competitive.

“I know sweetie. Go ahead and sleep, you have an early head start tomorrow.” Sam says and she kisses Ruby in the forehead. “Good night, darling!” Lena shouts as Ruby ascends to the stairs.

“She’s really hyped this time. She wanted to make sure that she’ll do whatever it is that Kara had taught the team.”

“I bet she’ll be wonderful. She has a great coach.” Lena smiles at the thought of Kara. True to her word, Kara tried harder to prove Lena that she wasn’t ignoring her. She calls her and sends Lena lunch in replacement of her presence. Lena found it sweet that even though Kara wasn’t there to share a meal with her, she made sure that Lena was still eating.

“What’s got you smiling there?” Sam teases. “Is it a certain hot blondie?”

She shakes her head at Sam and darts towards the kitchen to get something to drink. “Nothing. I just remembered Kara and something that happened a few days ago.”

“Hey, what happened? Why was I not informed?” Sam whines like a child. “I have best friends rights! First line of gossip goes to me!”

“There is nothing to gossip about, you weirdo.” Lena chuckles. “I’m just really happy right now.”

“Can you tell me more?” Sam says sitting at the bar stool this time opposite Lena pouring herself a good amount of red wine. She thinks whether she should tell Sam what happened. “Please? Best friend rights?”

She relents. She sighs and takes a moment to collect herself. It was the first time that she was going to say it out loud.

“I almost kissed Kara.” She hears a choke sound with liquid. Sam was coughing so hard.

“Excuse me, you what?” Lena went over to Sam’s side and patted her back. “Are you alright?” She asks her friend.

“I think I will be after that revelation.” Sam says rubbing her chest. “When did this happen? And why did I not know about this sooner?” She says a bit louder and Lena slaps her hand into Sam’s mouth.

“Can you lower your voice. Ruby is supposed to be sleeping right now.” Sam nods and gives Lena a _go on with the story_ look. So Lena tells her.

She starts from the beginning. Their frequent lunches and constant communications. The launch and the celebratory dinner that Kara insisted. The moment between them that talking about their losses and Kara’s words of affirmation had Sam _She said that to you? Now I want me a Kara Danvers too!_ that had earned her a glare from Lena.

And now the kiss.

Or _almost kiss._

Whatever.

“So, you’re saying that it was you who kind of gave Kara the green light to kiss you?” Sam confirmed sipping up her wine.

“Yes. I was quite disappointed that it didn’t happened though but now that I think about it, I’m also quite thankful that she didn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because I would have panicked at that time since I was not sure of how I feel.” She said truthfully.

“And are you sure right now?” Sam questioned her with worry. If you’ll ask Lena that question a few weeks ago, without a doubt that she was confused about how she felt about the blonde. It was not everyday that your world gets knocked up by one Kara Danvers.

She had a lot of processing to do, that was for sure.

But now, she was sure that yes. She was certain about how she feels about Kara.

“Yes. I am definitely sure about how I feel about her.” Lena smiled. “I’m falling for her. I want to give it a chance in my heart to want or like someone again.”

“Lena! That’s great to hear! I’m so happy for you!” Sam said giving her friend a tight happy hug that knocked off all the air in her lungs. “I know it has been hard for you lately but I’m glad you took my advice and give it a try. See, I give great advice.” Her friend said smugly.

“Actually, it was Lex’s advice that made me realize that.” Was her response.

“He knew before me? That’s not fair!” Sam said in mock indignation.

“No, he didn’t. We were talking about the acquisition and something he said really made sense to me.”

“And that is?”

“Turning our chances into possibilities.”

“He said that? Who knew your brother could be so poetic?” Lena laughed at Sam’s comment.

“He was referring to the business most of the time but he doesn’t know what I told you. So keep it to yourself.” Sam was reeling of happiness and Lena was happy she told her best friend about it. However, there was one bit of a problem that Sam seemed to have voiced out.

“What’s your plan then?” She didn’t really have the plan. She was aware that she wanted to give it a chance. To be with Kara because Kara was worth it but she had no idea how. It has been years since she had professed her love to somebody, namely Andrea.

Truth was, Andrea as the one who made the move and told her that she liked her. Lena never did that, never took the first step into doing something. She was scared that it would not work out of her and it still has her thinking that it might go the same with Kara. She was used to the attention, not the other way around.

“I actually don’t know.” She sighs. “I just want to do it little by little. Not rush into it.” Sam was just looking at her sympathetically.

“Take your time, okay? What matters is that you found it in yourself to realize that you want to try again. That’s the best thing that you can do for yourself. Everything else will follow from there and I’m sure of that.”

“Thanks, Sam. It really means a lot to me that you understand. I don’t want to spring into it all at once. Right now, I just want to enjoy the moment of being near her.”

“Now you’re turning into a sap.” Sam teased.

“Oh, shut up!”

\----

Let it be known that Lena loved spending her Saturdays with Sam and Ruby. They would usually go out and eat, if Ruby has a game or practice, they would come with her if the child insists. But there was something about this Saturday that makes Lena excited. If you’re going to ask her, she would deny it a few weeks back. But there are no reasons for denial right now. She was just happy with the fact that she’ll be seeing Kara in a few hours later.

Which Ruby was mirroring as well. She can’t be really annoyed at her niece for liking Kara. She was a very likable person and besides, Ruby was a kid. She can’t be jealous of a Kid but after she learned that Sam would drop Ruby earlier to do a warm up prior to the game, she did allow herself to sulk for a moment because Ruby would get a head start and see Kara right away and she still needs to wait for 3 hours to do so.

Lena never really felt this way. Well not before Andrea at least and not after she was gone. Sure, boarding school sexual awakening may have shaped her to the lesbian that she was right now, but no amount of crushes or flings had made her feel giddy like a school girl.

She may have taken her precious time to do a little research on the sport that Ruby was playing. Sure, she knew the basics but knowing it a little deeper would help her cause. She wanted to understand how the rules work so she can cheer on Ruby correctly.

It doesn’t have anything to do with Kara.

After 3 painstakingly hours, they were currently in the field and there she saw Ruby and her team doing warm up sessions. They sure do look determined and excited about what was about to happen and Sam was being such a soccer mom, waving at Ruby from time to time.

She scans over the area and there she sees Kara alongside the other coach that was handling Ruby’s team. They were discussing probably the strategy to pull this game off and Lena was then again amazed by Kara’s focus on the game. She was so focused on the discussion and Lena can see the small crinkle forming on the reporter’s head.

_Cute._

The game has started and if Sam was just waving earlier, she had now gone to full time soccer mom mode and was yelling her cheer to Ruby’s team. It was pretty intense and before Lena knew it, she was also focused on the game was well.

Her eyes were currently on the ball and she followed the movement and was happy when the ball was passed on to Ruby. Lots of running were happening for about a total of 15 minutes already when she heard a blow of a whistle from the referee.

To Lena’s surprise, she saw Kara run into the field. The referee approached Kara and said that she needed to go back to the sides. She really didn’t know what happened because her eyes were on Ruby and the ball and when she scanned the area, she found one of Ruby’s team mates slumped in the ground.

Obviously, it meant that something bad had happened and by the looks of Kara, she was not happy. It was beginning to be rowdy because the next thing she hears is Kara screaming at the referee.

_“Did you not see that? She was charged from the behind. You’re not calling a foul and my player is wounded.”_

_“I need you to get back to the sides, coach Danvers. If not, I may give a penalty.”_ The referee countered.

_“To hell with your penalty, call a foul and I’ll take that penalty.”_

She saw Kara eye the referee who was not relenting but after a moment, he just slumped and called out a foul on the opposing team. Kara then went and picked up her student and assisted her into their side and called out a replacement.

“Hey, look. Hottie alert.” Sam tipped her head over to where Kara was and Lena slapped her arm. “I swear Lena that if you didn’t tell me that you had the hots for Kara, I’d like to try and snog Hottie Kara for you.”

“Sam! Let your voice down!” She dragged Sam into the benches allowing her to sit down. “No snogging and stop eye-fucking her.” She remembers Kara during the party that CatCo hosted a few months ago. Kara really knew how to make a brave face. _Hot._

“Are you really jealous right now, Lena?” Sam grinned at her.

“No, I am not. You’re just being inappropriate.” She said through gritted teeth. She received a chuckle in response.

“You better make your move fast Lena or I swear to god someone else will do it for you.”

That got Lena’s attention. She shouldn’t have been threatened with what Sam had said but that definitely got her attention. It isn’t rocket science. Kara was attractive. Well, attractive was definitely a weak way to describe her, she was totally a package.

She was beautiful, smart, funny, witty, maybe a little clumsy and can reduce into a pile of nervous wreck if her rambling was a giveaway, but these are the things that make Kara so… well, Kara.

But.

She was also insanely hot even without trying. Lena blushes at the thought of the restroom incident before. If she was being honest, she knew that Kara was fit given that she was an athlete but to see her ripped like that? Lena was sure she had a mild heat stroke at the thought of those glorious abs. She definitely felt like a creep but nobody needed to know that. And don’t get her started on the arms. Muscle for days is all that she can think about and Kara was not helping her case.

Right now, she has her sweater’s sleeves rolled up to have of her arm and still it exposed those arms that was formed through years of practice. She knew how those strong arms had felt around her and she gets hot flashes when she thinks about it.

But she didn’t want to seem like a creep.

Bottom line is that Sam may have a point. And she just shrugged her shoulders.

It was almost dark when the game ended and still Ruby’s team won which made Kara smile all over. Sam and Lena went over to congratulate Ruby and Kara for the win.

“That was an intense game.” Sam said kissing her daughter’s head. “And you, my soccer star is so good! I’m so proud of you honey!”

Lena just looked at the exchange in front of her it made her heart swell. Sam was really good with being a mother and it made her prouder for the efforts that her friend was doing.

“Hey, how was your team mate?” Lena asked this time.

“She’s doing better. Good thing coach was there to fix it.” Ruby said tipping her head towards Kara.

“What you did there was so brave, Kara. You’re a really great coach.” Lena said affectionately. She saw the blonde blush at the praise.

“I’m not just in the job for the coaching. I want to make sure that we protect them too. Athletes need to stand up with one another.” She said smiling. If Lena was not convinced that Kara was the most caring person in the world, she is now. There was just something about Kara being so protective that makes her heart flutter.

“I agree. I’m glad Ruby and her team mates get to learn from the best.” Sam said. “And because of that, let’s go. I know you’re tired. Let’s just eat out?” She said to her daughter who was nodding her approval. Ruby did seem beat and hungry. “You want to join us, Kara?” Sam offered.

“Thanks Sam, but I might have to say no for now. Mike had an emergency back at home so I need to fix the stuff here first.” The blonde had politely declined and gave her an apologetic smile.

“Hey, that’s okay. Next time then?” Kara gave her a quick nod and smiled.

“I’ll go and start with the fixing. I’ll see you both on Monday?” The reporter asked.

“Sure. Take care, Kara.” With a last lingering smile to Sam and to Lena, Kara jogged her way back to their equipment.

They were walking towards the parking lot when Lena paused. Sam, being the ever-attentive friend that she is just smiled at Lena and gave her a small nod. “Go ahead, I’ll just see you on Monday.” And with that, Lena was running back to the field and spotted Kara piling the cones that they used earlier for the early practice.

“Hey, you.” She greeted and she swears that she saw Kara jump about 2 feet from the ground.

“Jesus, Lena. You scared me half to death.” Kara said clutching at her chest and this brought Lena to the realization that she might have given Kara a mild heart attack.

“Oh my god, Kara. I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean too. Is your chest hurting?” She said hurriedly.

To her relief Kara just gave her smile and shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I just thought that you left already.”

She was about to but to her surprise, or lack thereof, her feet had dragged her back here even before she can think of a reason why. Good thing she was always quick to think on her feet. She was a business woman after all and countless years of training on impromptu alibis made it easy for her.

“I just thought that maybe you needed a little help?”

“Thank you, Lena. Actually, I’m almost done here. I just need to bring these all over to the car and then I’m good to go. Do you maybe want to give me a hand?” Lena gave her a nod and walked over to where Kara was picking up the equipment that they had used as they walked towards where Kara’s car was.

“You did really good today, Kara. To be honest, I didn’t know what was happening until I saw you jump over to the field. If I’m correct, you almost had a penalty for not asking permission to enter the field, right?” She asked as Kara was placing their things at the compartment.

“Wow, someone’s been doing their research?” Kara teased her.

“I mean, I’m no expert but I wanted to learn the sport.” She schooled her features. She didn’t want to spill that one of the reasons was because of Kara’s love for the sport. “You know, for Ruby.” Kara gave her a bright smile.

“That’s good to hear Lena. I can actually teach you some moves if you like?” The blonde offered.

“And how do you suppose we do that?”

“The balls are still left, let’s go grab then and let me teach you the basics.” Kara held her hand and practically dragged her to the field again. She wasn’t sure if the fast beating of her heart was from running or from Kara’s hand in hers. As they reached the spot, Kara took one ball form the bag and went back to Lena.

“Here, so let’s do some basics and you’ll get the hang of it.” Lena nodded. She was nothing if not determined and she will make sure she aces this basic soccer skill tutorial.

“Let’s do some basic kicking towards the goal.” The reporter kicked the ball towards Lena. “Now, you have to kick the ball towards me. I’ll try to block it.” And she did what she was told. To make a good impression, she made sure to put an extra amount of determination with her kick. But like any other kind of sport that uses balls…

She misses. fell butt first to the ground. _God, I hate balls._ The good side was Kara was running towards her and offered her a hand, which she gladly took by the way.

“Sorry about that.” She grimaced. Kara being Kara scanned her if she had any bruises and asked if she was fine. “I’m okay, Kara. Let me do it again.”

_See? determined._

She kicks the ball again and actually hits it, but it didn’t even reach Kara’s foot. This earned a small snort from Kara and Lena raised her eye brows at her. “You’re good at this, give me a show then.” Lena challenged. She knew that it was a wrong move. Because Kara knew how to do this and…

She was now showing Lena not only how to score a goal, but some cool soccer tricks.

Kara was currently passing the ball using her feet and making sure that the ball doesn’t touch the ground. She tosses the ball and lands on her head and tries to balance it and it falls back into her feet. She balances the ball on her right foot and tosses it to form a circle. Kara gave her a smug smile and just like that, they were back to being just silly with each other.

The blonde continued with what she was doing and Lena was tuning in not because Kara was insanely hot with the tricks that she was doing, but because she was just actually having fun.

This was Kara with the ball. Her soccer loving self and not with the laptop and recorders. This was her world before everything came crashing on her. Lena can see that Kara was in her element and it made her fall a tad bit more for the reporter. Her musing was cut when Kara’s glasses accidentally falls on the ground because the ball tipped it over.

Kara laughs at her silliness and places the ball on her arm to look for her glasses but Lena beat her to it.

“You sure you’re a soccer player? You seem a bit clumsy?” Lena said picking up the glasses and cleaning it with her shirt.

Kara feigns mock offence. “I’ll have you know that I am one of the best players of my time.” When Lena glances over, she didn’t know when it happened but they were already close to each other. Kara was looking at her intently. Their height difference evident, she couldn’t help but drown on the blue eyes that were looking at her.

At this peaceful moment, she places the glasses into Kara’s face oh so slowly and brushes a few stray hairs falling from Kara’s face without breaking eye contact. Her hands however have betrayed her once again because from brushing the hair from Kara’s face, they once again travelled oh so slowly to her neck.

This was a familiar moment. Eyes locked on her; she can feel Kara’s heavy breath proving that she was just as affected like she is. Her eyes darted over to Kara’s lips and she was drawn from there.

_Take a chance._

_You better make a move._

So, she dives in.

She crashes their lips in a swift move. _To hell with taking it slow!_ And kissing Kara was better than what she had thought however the blonde was frozen to her spot. _Oh my god, did I cross a line again?_ Her fears came crashing back and as she was about to pull away, Kara grabbed her waist and crashed their lips together.

It wasn’t chaste but it wasn’t wild as well. It was a mixture of both. And Lena made sure to push Kara into her for emphasis that she was loving this kiss. They pulled away from each other but their foreheads were connected. She just closed her eyes and she knew that Kara has hers closed too. It was a silent moment of understanding.

She wasn’t sure if she can get past this.

She wanted this.

She wanted Kara.

“Apparently, your good at kissing too.” She whispered as she opened her eyes and cupped Kara’s cheeks so she can look at those beautiful eyes again giving her a quick peck. Kara just laughs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all love this one!  
> What did you like about this chapter?
> 
> PS. 
> 
> I discovered tumblr just today and decided that I need to go out of my rock. Lol. 
> 
> Hit me there too as I learn how to use it. Hahaha. 
> 
> https://songstoponder.tumblr.com


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They go on a date because, why not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back. Here's another update for all of you.   
> Again, I haven't had the time to reread so excuse me for the errors. I'll fix them all I promise.   
> Enjoy this chapter!

It may sound exaggerated but kissing Kara was like a new level of living for Lena. All the thoughts about the confusion seemed to fade away once she was able to take the leap of faith and move towards Kara. Now she knows that the blonde was something that she can no longer take away from her system.

Kissing Kara was like basking in the goodness of the sun.

It was freeing, refreshing, calm and it was _worth it._

“You have no idea how long I wanted to do that.” She whispers, their foreheads pressed together. She heard Kara hum in response. “Was it okay?” She asked. She wanted to make sure that Kara was in good terms with it too. Kara kissed her back, right? It’s supposed to be a good sign but Lena was a scientist and she always needed answers to prove her point.

But as much as she wanted to just keep kissing Kara, she knew that they needed to talk and it seems that Kara was thinking about the same thing.

“It was more than okay.” Kara sighed. “How are you feeling?”

“Why would you ask me how to feel?” Lena pulled back but her hands still rested on Kara’s neck. Kara smiled at her and took her hand. She gestured to the bench for them to sit. Kara was quiet for a while and Lena can’t help but be nervous. She was used to Kara being able to calm her down with her words but the blonde seemed to enjoy the silence as they sat down. She was still nervous though.

She heard Kara take a deep breath but held her hand firmly.

“You know why, Lena.” Kara said. “Tell me, how are you feeling right now?”

“I really don’t know why you’re asking me that, Kara. But I’m feeling okay. I’m a bit nervous but I’m… good.” Kara was looking at the ground but her hands still firm on Lena’s. She can’t help but think if she was wrong and it was making her anxious. She was used to the other woman being a rambling mess, but this side of Kara who was focused and silent made her rethink about her actions.

“I want you to know that I have been dreaming about this moment. Not only the kissing part but the part where I can tell you how much you mean to me.” The blonde started. “I—you mean so much to me Lena and I don’t know when it started, but I know that I care about you a lot more than I should be.”

She stayed silent knowing that Kara has more things to say to her. “I just want to know how you feel because I care so much about you. And a lot has happened to your life before I came and I wanted to make sure that you’re fine with everything right now that I’m _here._ ”

“Kara—”

“Let me finish first. Is that okay?” She nods and lets Kara proceed and she receives a smile from the blonde.

“It’s been a long time and if I’m being honest, I’m really nervous right now.” Kara chuckles with a hint of a sigh. “I want you to know that there is a selfish part of me that… that just wants you. But I don’t want to rush you. I can be everything you need. This doesn’t have to change things between the two of us. I just want you to know that I can accept anything that you can offer me because I care so much about you.”

At first, Lena felt like Kara was pushing her away but with how Kara said it with sadness in her eyes, she couldn’t help but feel her heart grow even more for her. “I just want you to know that I’m always here for you, Lena. I’m ready when you will be.”

Kara was now looking at Lena and there was a look of longing in her eyes. Kara was done, it was her turn now.

_Take a chance._

“Kara, I’ll be honest with you.” _Here goes nothing. “_ At first, I was not sure about how I felt for you or how I felt about us. It was terrifying for me and as you know, I have been hurt badly before you came.” She paused because she needed not only air for this conversation but she also needed to compose herself. If she was doing this now, she needed to do it fine.

“I was confused and I was a bit in denial about all of this. I didn’t want to acknowledge my feelings because I was happy to have you as a friend. But Kara…” She took Kara’s hand and placed it in her cheeks. Kara’s hands felt so good on her face. She needed to draw courage from this particular touch.

“…you make me want to try again.” She finally said it. “I don’t want to think of the what if’s or anything. I just want you to know that you mean so much to me too. And you’re right, this doesn’t have to be rushed because things like these take time. But I want you to know that this means something to me. That kiss and this moment… it means so much to me.”

There was a shift in Kara’s face as she faced the ground again. She couldn’t point if it was relief or sadness in the other woman’s eyes but she wasn’t going to let it go just yet.

“Kara.” And the blonde’s eyes were on her once more. “What are you thinking about, darling? Please talk to me.” Her hands automatically went to the reporter’s face. To her shock, there were tears in Kara’s face.

“Oh, Kara— I’m sorry I didn’t mean to upset you… I…” But she felt Kara’s fingers brush on her lips that caused her to be silent. It was a soft and loving touch.”

“No, I’m not upset… I’m just, I don’t know. I want to be with you, Lena. So much that it’s really freaking me out.” The blonde suddenly gave her an answer.

“Why are you freaking out? Tell me. So we can try to get past this.” She said almost pleadingly. _Was it supposed to be this hard?_

“It’s… it’s just because you’re so amazing.” Kara answered her. For the past months that she has known Kara, she had been aware of the small things that the blonde seemed to do and her traits. One of them was to know when she was lying or when she was not telling something completely. But she let it go for now because she had other things that needs to be resolved.

“Kara… I’m just me.”

“And I’m me. Look at me, Lena.” She ran her hands on her hair. “I’m not selling myself short here, but you’re way too out of my league. I’m – I just – Andrea was not just a cub reporter. She was powerful like you. I can’t even compete with that.” The other woman finished in an almost whisper kind of way.

Oh.

_Oh._

“Kara…” She inhaled all the air that she needed. It pained her to see Kara feeling so small about herself. “I want you to listen to me and remember what I’m going to say.” She gained a nod from her sole audience who was just staring at her eyes.

“You don’t have to be anything else because you are exactly what I need, want, and more. You’re not just a reporter. You are an amazing person. You love people, you are passionate and driven. You are a fighter and a survivor.” She said the last word with more conviction. “I understand that you don’t want me to rush on things, but I really want to try again with you. I’m drawn to you and I don’t want to fight it anymore.”

She saw Kara’s expression change from longing to surprise. A small smile forming on her lips as Lena removed the remnants of tears on the blonde’s face and kissed her once more like it’s a seal on this whole ordeal.

“I want you too and I want to give this a chance.” And Kara gave her a crashing hug in return.

“Are you sure?”

“I am.” She hugged Kara back. “I don’t know how we’ll do this, but I want to.”

“Small steps?” Kara asked in a hushed tone as if she was afraid that the spell would break and Lena kissed her again. _Yes._

“In that case, I want to do this right.” Kara said pulling herself away from the kiss. “I want to take you out for dinner. If that’s alright with you?” The blonde asked nervously. ­Gosh, can this woman be more adorable?

_We were literally kissing and now she’s shy._

“Sure, darling. Tell me when and I’ll make time for you.”

Lena went home that night with a face aching smile on her face. Laying down at her bed, she took a hold of Andrea’s picture that was beside her bed and touched the frame.

“I did it, love.” She whispered. “You know I still love you, right?” She should feel crazy about this. Talking to Andrea in thin air. She had been doing it ever since and it became a habit.

_Right._

And she was out.

\---

Up or down?

_Why is this so hard now?_

They kissed already, right? Surely Kara couldn’t care less about what she wears or how she wears her hair. It was stupid. She was being paranoid. This wasn’t a hard decision but she has been pacing her bedroom for almost an hour looking at what she needs to wear and how her hair should look like.

_Ugh. I can’t do this._

“Sam, thank god! Do you think I should let my hair up or down?” She heard groaning from the other line.

_Shit._

“What the hell, Lena?” Another one. “It’s…” she hears shuffling. “It’s literally 2:13 in the morning!” She took a quick glance at her clock and realized that yes, it was late for her evening and early for Sam’s morning. “You called me just to ask that?”

“Oh god, I’m so sorry! I didn’t notice the time!” She panicked. Feeling shameful for disturbing her friend.

“Lena, honey. It’s okay. I know you’re nervous.” Sam chuckled sleepily. After she had gone home last Saturday with her emotional conversation with Kara, they have opted to have dinner on a Friday evening.

And apparently, it was already Friday that is why she was freaking out.

She had her reasons of course but mostly was because, she hasn’t been in a date since ages. It was so long ago since her last date with Andrea, and even then, she didn’t mind because for the long time that they had been together and literally lived together, she knew what Andrea wanted when it comes to her appearance. She knew how to get her attention.

But this was Kara.

Which was a different person.

And they only ate together once.

And it was a friendly dinner.

Ugh.

Yes.

She was nervous.

“I’m really sorry, Sam.”

“No worries. As your best friend, it is my duty to make sure that you would be ready for that ridiculously exciting date later with Kara.” Sam laughed, still a little bit groggy. “I’d say you need to let your hair down. You look lovely with them down.”

“Thanks, Sam. You’re a life saver. I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah, and get some sleep Lena. It’s late and you need a good kind of beauty rest. I don’t want to see you at the office until lunch time. You need beauty rest.”

“You know I’m literally your boss, right?”

“Yeah. But I don’t care. Just let me handle the first part of the day tomorrow. Come on over at lunch. Just rest.” She smiled with how her friend is taking care of her. She really feels all the love around her lately.

“Thank you, Sam. I owe you one.”

“Yeah. Repay me with some juicy gossip in a while, okay? I’ll go back to my _beauty_ sleep. Surely the board needs my looking pretty. Goodnight. Love yah!”

And the line goes down.

_Oh, Sam._

She slept until 10 AM in the morning.

\---

Surprisingly for Lena, it had been absolutely a lovely dinner that night. Kara picked her up dressed in a fine grey suit that hugged her body perfectly. All night, she couldn’t help but steal a glance at Kara’s wonderfully toned legs and arms. She knew that she wasn’t being subtle about it but a girl can peek, right?

It was hard not to look at Kara that way specially when Kara was paying so much attention to her as well. Kara, ever the good person that she is complimented Lena every time that she had the chance too. The CEO was confident of herself and was used to compliments that were thrown to her left and right but something about the way Kara points out how amazing and wonderful Lena is makes her heart flutter.

_“I knew that you were brilliant even before I met you. As I said before, I usually find you wonderful and beautiful when I get to see you do your TED Talks or your conferences on live stream. I had always been a fan. I love your work, Lena.”_

_“Is there anything you couldn’t do?”_

_“Pretty feisty, aren’t you Ms. Luthor? You are really amazing.”_

And the list goes on and on and at the end of the night, she was floating thanks to the kind words of Kara and specially how Kara had treated her that night.

She had her hair down by the way and it was a great decision because Kara said it really looked nice on her.

They were currently seated in a bench at a park near the restaurant that Kara had brought them. And of course, Kara would notice the way Lena was shivering because she was so perfect and attentive like that.

“Here. You can take my coat.” Kara took her coat off and Lena _almost_ choked on her spit with how Kara swiftly took it out from her that made her muscles flex. She was thankful that it wasn’t really bright where they were seated.

“Oh no, Kara I couldn’t.” She protested. It was for her own sanity more than her need of warmth. She can’t afford to die because she was choking on her own thanks to Kara’s wonderfully formed arms.

_Athletes. Golly._

Yeah. It was safe for Kara to keep the coat.

“Please. I insist. I can practically feel you shivering.” She said and draped the coat over Lena’s shoulder. _Who ever said that chivalry was dead?_

“And besides. I don’t get too cold. For some odd reason, I am always warm as Alex would say it. I just think I’m hot like that.” The reported ended with a wink. _God she was really thankful it was dim here._

She rolls her eyes out of fondness and really, _really_ just to hide her blushing face. There was silence as they stayed seated and looking over to the vast greens that the park was covering. The faint sound of the fountain waters was helping Lena with her fast beating heart.

“Thank you for tonight.” She then said to break the silence. “I had fun and I really loved tonight.”

“You don’t have to thank me if it will benefit me too, right?” Kara answered back and the blonde fidgeted over her glasses and held her breath suddenly aware of how her statement might have sounded. “I mean—I was saying that benefit in a way because I really wanted to spend time with you. Uhm over—like this dinner. Right. Dinner. Date. Right. Shutting up now.”

Can Kara get any cuter? Even in the faint lights, she can see how Kara was turning red due to embarrassment. She kissed Kara in the cheek and placed her head on the reporter’s shoulder to save her from even more embarrassing herself any further and this seemed to calm the blonde beside her.

Kara just held her until it was time to go.

“Thank you for bringing me home, Kara. Would you like to come inside for a while?” She asked as they walked inside, Kara just walking behind her.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Can I offer you a drink?”

“Water would be fine.” She nodded and proceeded to get water for the blonde. When she came back to the living room, Kara was standing in front of her large sans the coat window adoring the late city lights hands in her pockets. It was really a wonderful view. She looked handsome from where Lena was standing from.

_How can she be so beautiful and handsome at the same time?_

The way Kara was standing in her living room eyes lost to the world drawn Lena more to her. If there is something that she enjoys the most, it will be these quiet moments that she can have with Kara. To just stare at her and admire how great of a person Kara Danvers is despite all the things that had happened to her. Kara was physically strong; she can see that perfectly but there was something about her character that makes her stronger.

These things are the things that pulls her into Kara. Quiet literally because a moment ago she was just standing in her kitchen bar, but now she was clinging from Kara’s behind hugging her torsos.

She will always be drawn to Kara.

If Kara had been shocked with how Lena was clinging onto her, she was polite not to make it show and just have Lena take her fill of Kara just for the night.

“Everything good?” The blonde asked softly rubbing Lena’s hands.

“Yes. Perfect.” She answered inhaling the sweet and citrusy scent that is just so Kara.

The blonde shifted into a proper hugging position that made it possible for her to place an arm over Lena’s body. The CEO couldn’t help but just lean forward more and bask in the warmth that Kara has to offer. It was a lovely and peaceful moment and she buried her face into Kara’s chest while the blonde placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Thank you for giving me a chance.” Kara whispered. Lena just glanced over the blue eyes that she had learned to adore so much. It was not an intense gaze that she saw, but it was soft and safe. She didn’t know how to answer Kara so she did the next best thing that she could to show her that she was _also_ thankful for the chance that she had given Kara.

_That she had given them._

So she kissed her. It was a soft kiss, long, and sweet kiss. And she likes it like that. But with Kara’s arms looped over her and her whole body pressed into the athlete, she can’t help but lean in another time and kiss Kara in a not _so_ sweet way.

Soft kisses became urgent and Lena can’t help but run her hands through Kara’s nape and through her hair. She was definitely doing this right because the way Kara was holding her was giving her the go signal to do so. Open mouthed kisses that were warm and their breaths became heavier by the moment. Gasping for air, Lena took the chance to examine Kara’s face who was also panting with the kiss they did. Her eyes were blown and had a darker shade of blue in them. Before she knew it, she was being kissed again but this time, the blonde bit and licked her lower lip asking for entrance.

Like clockwork, she opened her mouth and allowed the entrance that Kara was asking for. She pulled Kara into her motioning her to just do it and of course, Kara obliged. Lips crashing and teeth clashing, it was definitely a messy kiss.

The next thing she knew she was practically dragging Kara into her couch and pushed the blonde down causing a small squeak from the blonde. Taken over by how hot Kara looks in her suit and swollen lips, Lena can’t help herself but straddle the woman in front of her and not giving Kara a chance to speak by pressing their lips once more.

She felt Kara’s lips leave hers and made her miss the contact, but before she can protest, she can feel Kara’s lips on her jaws and on her neck and her hands were placed firmly on her hips, holding Lena. She was still on top of Kara and she can’t help but arch her back when she felt Kara lick and suck a spot on her collar bone all the while releasing a series of soft moans from her. It was needy and she wasn’t going to deny that she envisioned the night to end this way much to her surprise.

All she can feel was Kara’s hands touching the back of her thighs and slowly took her hand up to her back and pulled her into her chest. Lena was sure she was going to combust if she wasn’t getting any skin out of Kara.

So she searches for skin.

She unbuttoned Kara’s shirt and kissed her fiercely which earned a moan from Kara. But before she can finish the unbuttoning of the shirt, she felt soft hands on her wrist urging her to stop. This caused her to stop and gave Kara a glance who was currently panting with her head placed on Lena’s chest.

“Lena…”

And to her horror, she almost bolted out of Kara’s lap but the blonde had beaten her into it pulling her back. “Oh my god, Kara. I’m so sorry. I—I didn’t—I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I… you were not ready and I just – God I’m so stupid.” She was saved by Kara’s fingers on her mouth once again and giving her a soft smile.

“No, no need to be sorry. I—I want to, believe me I do.” She sighed and held Lena’s face. “God, Lena. Do you know how you make me feel? You’re so beautiful that you just take my breath away.” She says brushing a few strands of hair out of Lena’s face.

“I always found you so beautiful and I can’t help myself but I have too because I want to do this right with you. I want to take this slow because I want you to be sure and I want you to be ready. We’re taking this at your pace and we don’t have to rush.” She said in a loving way. “I’m not going anywhere Lena.”

“We’ll take this slow and steady. I’m yours for the taking, Lena. Never forget that.”

She found herself crying with how Kara said those words. If you asked earlier how she would feel with Kara stopping them, she would say she was so frustrated that she can murder someone but after what Kara said, she was relieved that nothing came out of them making out.

She was right.

Kara was right.

She was not ready, but she wanted to do it. But not now. Not when she was still wrapping herself around the fact that she allowed herself to be drawn to the blonde. She felt strong hands placed on her face softly wiping her tears away.

“Shh. Don’t cry Lena. Believe me, I am having a hard time controlling myself right now. But I’m just here for you, okay?”

“Thank you, Kara. That really means a lot to me.” The only thing she can bring herself to do was kissing Kara’s palm in the process. She was thankful for Kara grounding her back, but she was more thankful for the moment of understanding between the two of them.

“I’m right here. Always.”

“I really like you, Kara.”

There was a small nod of understanding from Kara and a small smile from that one statement.

“And I to you, Lena. So much.”

“So what’s our next step, Danvers?”

Kara just kissed her on her forehead and she drifts away into sleep.

\---

She woke up that morning in her bed. She woke up late again. Glancing over to her clock she saw that it was almost 10AM once more. She was slightly confused because the last thing she remembered was Kara on her couch and the conversation that they had last night. As time goes by, she can’t help but let her heart flutter even more at the amount of affection she has for Kara.

But Kara wasn’t here. She must have left and brought Lena to bed. That explains how she got here. To be quite honest, she had a good night sleep. One of a few that she has for a while now and maybe if has something to do with Kara taking care of her.

_So what’s our next step, Danvers?_

She remembered that question that night. What was the next step for her and Kara? She wanted to know and she was eager to take that step if it means that she can express how much the blonde means to her.

She took off from bed and headed straight into the kitchen after her bathroom routine. To her surprise, what she found on her kitchen counter was a bouquet of fresh flowers with a note in it. Coffee was brewed already and it seems that Kara took the liberty of cooking Lena breakfast.

She smiled to herself and took the note on the flowers.

_I made you breakfast and coffee. I’m sorry I couldn’t stay longer because I didn’t want to impose._

_Enjoy your day and the flowers!_

_PS!_

_You asked me for the next step._

_Please be my girl?_

_I’ll see you soon._

_‘K. xx_

Kara sure knew how to make a girl swoon.

And Lena will enjoy every bit of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... 
> 
> Thanks for tuning in guys. So far, I am happy with how the story is progressing.   
> Fair warning though, there will be angst in the following chapters. What chapter? I don't know yet but, really. I appreciate y'all. Keep safe peeps! 
> 
> PS:   
> Shout at me on tumblr @songstoponder   
> hahaha. Still learning how to work on that app. 
> 
> Tell me what you liked about this chapter and what you feel. 
> 
> <3


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's take a look with what's going on in Kara's head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter for y'all lovely people!

Kara was screwed.

She knew that. Ever since the time she had admitted her feelings to Lena, she had been screwed. She was in trouble because Lena Luthor had just kissed her. In fact, she was kissing her again! In her years of existence and dating, nothing can ever compare to this kiss that they were sharing. It has been always different with Lena. Everything was always different when it comes to Lena. But is this actually real? She had thought of this scene a couple of times so you can’t blame her if she thinks that this was all in her head. Or worst, what if she was dead? Was she dead?

_Am I dead? Is this what dying feels?_

Does dying feel like soft lips and steady hands? Does it feel like floating? Does it smell like Lena’s expensive perfume? But she wasn’t dead. Because she can feel her breath leaving out her lungs when Lena pulled away looking into her eyes after a brief moment of haze.

_“I want you too and I want to give this a chance.”_

These words from Lena made Kara believe that no, this wasn’t a dream and she’s perfectly alive _thank you very much_ , because those words made her heart beat extra fast than the way that she was used to. Hearing Lena actually say that she wants a chance with Kara was way beyond her imagination.

At first, she was certain that she can be whatever Lena needs. She was good with being friends even if it makes her heart ache and long for Lena. But it’s like the world has stopped because all she can think about is how Lena poured her emotions out that night even though there was a part of her that was still in love with Andrea.

Kara doesn’t dwell on that though. As long as Lena wants to give them a chance, she’ll take it. Whatever it takes because she wanted to treat Lena right. She deserved that and she deserved to be taken care of.

And that Kara can do.

Even if it means to take things slow.

\---

This night had been perfect for Kara. It was everything that she had ever wanted and more. To spend a great time with Lena, showing her that she was the most beautiful woman in the world for her, and to just know Lena more on a deeper level.

But not this deep. Repeat, not this level of deep, _yet._ She didn’t know when _it_ happened and she was pretty sure that she didn’t planned the night to turn around this way, with her body trapped in Lena’s space using her thighs and sitting on her lap with hot kisses.

She really wanted to take this slow but Lena was pressed to her and the idea of taking it slow was thrown out of the window, replaced by Kara slowly touching every inch of skin on Lena’s body that she can touch. She knew that she was doing a pretty good job because she was hearing moans from the younger woman.

She didn’t want to stop because she wasn’t ready or she didn’t want it. What actually made her stop was exactly Lena’s fingers.

Because Lena was wearing a ring.

On her left ring finger, and she was pretty sure it was the engagement ring that Andrea had given her because she had seen that in the pictures. Lena was still wearing it, and it made her heart ache just a bit. She didn’t want to point it out because she wasn’t petty like that.

Of course, Lena still wears it because that’s her last memory of Andrea’s love for her and she wasn’t a heartless person (she did gain Andrea’s heart after all) who would take that away from Lena. Her ego be damned. So, she stopped what was happening before it escalated quickly.

She was glad they talked about it, but not entirely the reason that Kara has in her mind. It was just obvious that Lena wasn’t that ready for her. But deep down, she was still thankful that she was given a shot at this. And not a single ring can take her down.

“So what’s our next step, Danvers?” Lena had asked her when all was calm. She just kissed the top of her forehead and she felt that the younger Luthor was breathing evenly on her chest.

_I can get used to this. The next step is up to you._

She waited for a few more time before she got up and carried Lena into her own bedroom. She placed the younger woman on her bed and placed a blanket over her. She chuckled at the sight of the woman in bed who suddenly got the blanket all over her like she was a burrito. Kara was sure that she never saw anything so adorable in her life.

She kissed Lena’s forehead and exited the room.

Lena’s place was expensive that was for sure and Kara was insecure again all of a sudden. Not because of Lena’s wealth but she remembered that this was where Andrea used to stay too. It was true that she didn’t knew how to compete with a dead person, and the said person being the reason that she was alive. She shouldn’t be feeling these things, but at the back of her mind she was actually admitting that a part of her was jealous with what Andrea had with Lena.

Hell, Lena was still wearing the engagement ring for goodness sake.

But again, Kara wasn’t a petty person. She wouldn’t be jealous of something that was not there anymore. So she focused on the good things and remembered that if it wasn’t because of Andrea, she would never have met Lena. She would never have the chance to meet the young woman and have the chance that she has right now.

She found a picture of Andrea and Lena on one of the tables in the living room and approached it. _Yeah It was the engagement ring._ This picture confirmed it. She smiled at the photo and admired how good they looked together. They really are a power couple and she chuckled to herself.

“Hey, boss.” She said to Andrea’s picture. “I hope you don’t mind but I just wanted to say thank you for giving me your heart.” She said softly. She had said thank you to Lena a couple of times already but never really to Andrea. “I hope you it’s okay that I like Lena. Maybe a lot more than I’m allowed too.”

She felt tears build up in her eyes and she immediately wiped them. “I’m not taking your place, I would never, but I—I promise to take care of Lena and make her happy. I will protect her and take care of her like you did. I know I can never be you…” she laughed at the thought. “I can never be you, but I hope your okay with me just being me for Lena. I’ll be good to her, I promise.” She smiled and placed the picture down.

Inhaling, she looked at the time and saw that she had stayed later than she was allowed too. But she couldn’t just leave yet. She wanted to take care of Lena but she didn’t want to seem like someone eager, so she did the next best thing that she can think about.

“Hey, I uhm, I know it’s late but can you bring me flowers on this address?” Pause. “Yes, that will be fine, Leslie. Sure! I really love it that your flower shop delivery service is 24 hours.” She smiled over the phone.” Pause. “Thank you, Leslie. I owe you one.”

And then she hangs up.

She waited for an hour before the delivery came in and it was a beautiful set of plumerias and lavender that smelled so nice. She was so pleased that she gave the delivery guy a rather large tip than what was necessary and placed the flowers on the counter. Afterwards, she proceeded with breakfast duty.

She knew it was a little bit early for breakfast but she wanted to do something nice for Lena before she goes and she really hopes that Lena won’t mind her snooping all over her kitchen. She was no cook, but breakfast she can do. Oh, and brew coffee too.

When she finished everything, it was almost 5AM but the sun hasn’t come out yet. Glancing over at the counter she sees the flowers and knows that she has to put a note or something.

“What’s the next step? She asked me what the next step is, right?” She really thought about it. After contemplating, she wrote a note about the breakfast and the flowers.

And a little something what the next step would be for the both of them.

_It’s your turn, Lena._ She thought smiling before leaving the apartment with the young CEO still lost to the world.

\---

“Well hello to you too, Kara.”

She almost jumped in surprise with her sister seated on her couch, smirking at her.

“Jesus, Alex. Weak heart, remember?” She rolled her eyes. “What are you doing here so early?”

“Maggie dropped me off because I was in need of a bathroom. I decided that your place was near compared to mine, so I figured that I’ll crash.” She said missing a beat. “And besides, I haven’t seen you in a while. How did your date go?”

Kara’s cheeks started to redden at the thought of what had happened last night, and what _didn’t_ happen last night.

“That good?”

“No! I mean, yes. It was good, but no with what you were thinking.” She said taking her coat off and placing it on one of her stools. “It was a great night. Take your head out of the gutter.” A snort was heard from across her room and she plopped herself on the floor.

“I bet it was. I’m happy your trying it Kara. I haven’t met Lena yet, but I think she’s really good for you. I just hope that she doesn’t make it hard for you.”

Her thoughts came back to the ring, the house and the picture with Andrea, but she didn’t linger there anymore. “Don’t worry. We want to take things slow. I want to be there for her when she’s totally ready, because I hell am.”

“Good thing, kiddo.” Alex tapped her head. “By the way, Gayle wanted me to give you this.” She handed an envelope to Kara that was sealed and had elegant strokes of letters on it.

“What this?”

“Open it up so you’ll find out. I can’t answer everything for you, Kara.” Alex rolled her eyes and that gained her a pillow thrown at her face.

“Oh. It’s a wedding invitation?” It came out as a question instead of a statement. “Yeah! I remembered that she was engaged! Cool! We definitely have to come!” Over the course of her whole heart ordeal, Gayle had been her friend alongside her interns Nia and Querl. She was honored to be invited to one of her most important dates of her life.

“Yeah, we’re coming. I have Maggie as a plus one. You can RSVP too, and she said you can bring another person.”

“But I think they had the date wrong. This is like…” She glanced at her calendar. “…3 months from now.”

“No, it’s really dated that way. I don’t know but of course, they have a lot of preparation to do and a lot of decisions to make. So, I think it’s just alright.” Her sister answered who was currently hovering over her fridge. A thought came into her mind as she was looking at Alex. Her sister was the best person in the world.

“Are you going to propose to Maggie anytime soon?” She heard a squeak from her fridge.

“Well…” Alex straightened her back and stared at the ceiling. “I will. I’m just waiting for the right timing. I really love her, Kara.”

And Alex really did. She remembered when Alex came running to her the first time that she had met Maggie. It was confusing for her sister at first. She met Maggie one night at the emergency room with a bruised face and a gunshot on her shoulder. From there, it was history. Alex being enamored by the woman, crying herself to sleep because she was scared of her new found feelings, until they became a couple, the fights about the future, and many more. But despite all that, Kara always knew that Alex would do anything for Maggie, and the same goes for the other woman towards her sister.

“I know. You better do it soon. She’s really a keeper. She’s like a walking vegan wise man.” And they shared a laugh at the thought.

“I’m really sleepy. Can I sleep here just for a while before going home? I don’t think I can move.” She heard Alex yawn. _Wow, being a doctor is really hard._

“Sure, Al. Go to the room. I’ll just wash up a bit and take a nap too.”

“Was sleeping together not an option last night?” And her sister got another pillow hit her face. Harder this time.

\---

It was almost 2PM when she opened her eyes. Scanning over to the other side of the bed, it seems like Alex gone home already. This was confirmed by a note on the bedside table.

_Got home and didn’t want to wake you up._

_Thanks for letting me crash. Love you!_

_-Al <3_

She smiled at the note and placed it inside her drawer where notes that she received are compiled. She has a lot of them. Fishing for her phone, she saw a text coming from Lena and this made her hold her breath. She was widely awake now.

What if she was too forward? Did her note make it weird? Was it better if she asked personally? _Of course it was better that way!_ She thought to herself. Lena might think that she’s a coward now for not asking that question personally. And to her horror, a thought crossed her mind and that made her sit up straight from where she was lying down.

_What if she hates me now? She might think that I couldn’t treat her right because I do all of the important questions with notes!_ She had screwed this up. She was sure of it and with that, she let out a loud sigh.

_Better face the inevitable._ She opened the message with her eyes closed. Slowly, she took a peek. The message read:

_Call me._

“That was it? Just call me?” She said baffled. What does that mean? Is it a bad sign? It can be right? There are no emojis on this message. “Oh god! I think she’ll reject me now.” She groaned. She was startled by the sound of her phone ringing. It was Lena calling. She knew that she needed to answer. Swallowing her nerves, she hit the answer button.

“Lena. Hey.”

“Hey, Kara. I called because you didn’t answer my message. I saw you read it already.” There was a pause and sounds of shuffling was heard on the other line. _Was Lena fidgeting?_

“Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. I must have zoned out again for a while.” She lied. She didn’t zone out. She was freaking out that was it. Here goes nothing. “I guess you read my note?”

“Yes. I did.”

“I’m sorry if I asked that question through a piece of paper. I’m just so nervous and I just – I wanted to...” She was cut off by Lena’s giggles on the other line.

“Why are you laughing?” She asked. Nervousness being the last thing on her mind.

“You’re a dork.” Was the short answer. There was a knock on her door. To her luck, her moment seemed to be cut short. She walked to her door and took a quick look at the peep hole. All air left her lungs when she opened the door. The brunette spoke again. “Can you be my dork?”

_I’m still dreaming, right?_ Her mouth was just hanging open at the sight in front of her and she just brought her phone down from her ears.

“Lena.” She breathed.

“Yes, Kara. I want to be your girl.”

Kara was sure that nothing else exists aside from the two of them.

“Really?” Her mouth was still open and quiet not believing what was happening. “Uhm… are you sure?”

Lena walked towards Kara; her phone also forgotten. “Well you asked the question, are you not sure?” She smirked. Lena really knew how to play her. It was inevitable. She can never win against this green-eyed lady. She’s willing to lose. Always.

“Just checking.” She smiled widely and grabbed Lena in the waist to crash their lips together. Truth be told, this is the first time that Kara has been bold with her actions towards someone that she likes. She always finds it hard to believe that people will actually like her or choose her. But with Lena, she will be brave and she wants to be brave. If it means she can get to kiss her like this whenever she wants, and if Lena will kiss her the same way that she does.

“Thank you, Lena.”

“You’ve been thanking me an awful lot, Kara. None of that anymore.” The brunette assured her.

“Uhm, how did you know where I lived?” Lena had never been to Kara’s so it was surprising to see Lena in her front door on a Saturday noon.

“Darling, I’m your boss, remember?” The CEO answered her with an easy face.

“Oh my god. I’m dating my boss! Lena, I can’t date my boss! What if you show favoritism? Well I—uhm, I know you wouldn’t, you’re not like that—I was just saying that, what it you know? But some people at work are assholes! I don’t want my colleagues to hate you because of me!” She was literally panicking but the other woman was just chuckling and staring at her. She was a rambling mess right now.

“Kara, darling. Can we sit down? As much as I like to hug you all day, I don’t think it’s okay to do it at your front door.”

“Oh. Right.” She cleared her throat. “Sit. Perfect.”

“Can you be more eloquent than that?” Lena was obviously teasing her.

“Lena.” She whined as they seated on her couch. “Stop being a smart mouth.” This earned her a hearty chuckle that made her smile too. She can’t believe that she can actually draw this side of Lena right now. She had known her for months, and she knew the brunette’s emotions and her thoughts, but she rarely saw her like this. Young, free, and apparently, a bully.

“Sorry, I can’t help but just tease.” The brunette then stopped chuckling and turned her smiling gaze at Kara. “Well, technically speaking, I am not your boss. Sam is the interim-CEO of the company. I just own a lot of shares and…” She fixed Kara’s glasses that were currently skewed “…Sam also owns most shares in the company. I’ll be sending her to a conference, right? The reason I chose her to go there was because, first, I trust Sam with literally anything, second is because…” The brunette bit her lip as if she’s collecting all the courage that she can get. “…I’ll be focusing on L-Corp so Sam will be the actual CEO of CatCo.” She finished.

Kara just blinked at the information. Her lips were opening and closing like fish out of the water. She didn’t know how to process the information. “Uhm, when did this happen?”

“We’ve been planning on it for a couple of weeks now. Everything has been hectic at L-Corp and while I love to drop by at CatCo from time to time, I’d rather focus my energy on the things that I certainly know how to handle.”

“Lena, that’s amazing. I mean, of course. I’m happy that you can do something that you actually love to do. That’s really great. Although I’m sad to not see you as often than I want to, I’m also happy because I can now breath. I really don’t want to be the girl who’s dating their boss.” She chuckled.

“I know, darling. I know.” Lena hugged her. “So, don’t panic, okay? As much as I adore you being a rambling mess, I’d rather us just celebrate the good things that are happening lately.”

“Yeah. We can do that. How about a late lunch?”

“You going to cook for me again?”

“No. I can’t do anything edible aside from breakfast. I’m literally a kitchen hazard.” She said shyly.

“That’s fine. Let’s just eat outside then?” The brunette smiled at her fondly.

“Sure. Let me just fix myself.” She got up and kissed Lena tenderly.

_I can’t believe I can get to do that now. Wow._

\---

“Yeah. I’ll grab dinner with Alex and Maggie.”

_“Okay, keep safe.”_ Came from the other line.

“Of course. Text me when you get home?”

_“Yes. I’m just wrapping up this email I have with me and head out. Jess is literally kicking me out of my office. Maybe she can be the boss.”_

“No, Jess is right. I’m with Jess here. You need to rest.” She rolled her eyes at her girlfriend. Lena can really be stubborn when she wants to.

_“Ugh. You two are no fun.”_

“Don’t be a baby Lena.”

_“But I’m your baby.”_ Lena said with a hint of teasing. She smiled to herself but she was sure that Lena was smiling at the other line as well. She can never really believe even in her wildest dreams that she would be able to hear Lena say things like this.

“That you are. Go home, okay? Keep safe. Bye, Lena.”

_“Bye, darling.”_ And the line went out.

She sat at the stool where Maggie and Alex were seated.

“Wow little Danvers. I can’t believe that you really got the girl! Look at you, being all brave and all.” Maggie said while scanning over at the menu.

“Yeah, Kara. I’m really happy for you. Who knew, right?” Her sister added.

Right. Who would have known? Kara was still in a daze about the recent events. It’s been 2 weeks since they made everything official between the two of them. It wasn’t easy to say the least. Every time she sees the ring on Lena’s finger, a small tug of hurt still stings her heart. But she couldn’t bring that up. Again, she was not petty, but it did hurt a bit. What’s important is that Lena is the one with her now and that they’re together.

“Yeah. Who knew.” She smiled.

“You better bring her to Gayle’s wedding then. You know, as your plus one.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” She answered.

“Uhm, I don’t know. I’m just being sensitive to what she may feel?”

“What do you mean?” Alex asked in confusion. She didn’t know how to point it out or how to answer the question. She was being cautions and sensitive, that was all. They’re still new into the relationship.

“Well, we only started dating. I don’t want to place her in an uncomfortable situation yet, you know. A lot of people would be there.” She shrugged trying to cover up the reason that was brewing on her head.

“How would she be uncomfortable? You’re there and I’m sure you’ll keep her company.” Her sister argued.

“And besides, she hasn’t met Gayle yet.” She countered.

“But…” Alex was interrupted by Maggie’s fingers on her mouth forcing her to shut up. She saw Alex glare at Maggie.

“Babe, really?” The small brunette said. “I think what Kara’s trying to say is that this is a wedding. Kara and her only started dating recently and by not wanting to put Lena in an uncomfortable position, Kara doesn’t only refer on the fact that Lena never met Gayle.” Maggie continued. “She’s actually being sensitive with how Lena would feel because Lena was supposed to be married. It may bring back hurtful memories to her if she goes to a wedding when hers didn’t even start to begin with.”

Alex was gaping at her girlfriend’s words and Kara was seriously wondering how on earth Maggie got that idea. That was actually what she was feeling.

_I’m starting to believe Maggie’s a psychic._

“Oh. That actually makes sense.” Alex said nodding like she was just absorbing all the information just now.

“I’m gonna treat Maggie lunch.” Kara declared causing her sister to glare at her.

“And why does she get a treat?” Still shooting a death glare at her.

“Because she actually understood how I felt.” She shrugged and Maggie just laughed.

“Up and high, Little Danvers!” The detective said and Kara reciprocated the high-five. Gosh, she really loves Maggie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. Thank you for all the kudos and comments that are coming in. I really appreciate that.   
> I'm pretty happy with how the story is progressing and I hope that you guys are too. There's still a couple of fluff chapters before we go to the angst part but I hope you liked this one. 
> 
> Tell me what you think! 
> 
> And hit me up on tumblr @songstoponder with a prompt that you'd like for me to write about SuperCorp or anything else because I really want to create great fics for them.They deserve it and we all deserve a SuperCorp Endgame even if it's just with the fics we can make. Thanks guys!   
> Ciao! <3


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is just pure fluff.   
> Family times because Lena deserves it.

Two months.

It had been two months since they started dating and it had been the best 2 months of Kara’s life. Every time she remembers the day that Lena came into her apartment to be _hers_ brought Kara to cloud nine. Ever since that day, she always wished and hoped that Lena would always be with her. To her delight, Lena also opted to stay more in her apartment than hers. Kara doesn’t question why and she wasn’t one to complain. Lena in her apartment is a sight that she would gladly welcome any time and any part of the day.

However.

As of now?

That wasn’t the case.

“Kara, you have to wake up!” Lena was shaking her now. After a month of dating, she gave Lena a spare key to her apartment so she can drop by anytime she wants. She wanted to give Lena a piece of her and what better way than to give her a spare key to use when she needs it for emergency or whatever?

But again, not like this. Apparently, today deems as an emergency.

“Darling. Please. Get up or I swear to the gods! This is an emergency.” Lena said firmer this time.

“5 minutes.” She mumbled.

“Kara Danvers, you already had three, let me repeat three requests for a quick 5-minute nap. That’s a total of 15 already. I need you to get up because we’re getting groceries!” The brunette hissed and Kara knew that she needed to get up. Lena used her full name. _Sheesh_.

“But it’s barely even breakfast time.” She mumbled. Golly, she lo— _adored_ Lena a lot but there is a 7AM rule. But damn, all her rules be damned, she sat up. “Okay, okay. I’m up.” She chanced a glance at the brunette who was pacing in her bedroom with all the look of panic in her eyes. She found this very endearing though. Lena Luthor pacing on her bedroom with the look of pure panic in her face. Who would have thought that the great Lena Kieran Luthor had this side? She was always cool, calm and collected. That’s one of reasons why she was enamored by the younger woman. She couldn’t help but chuckle and this earned her a glare _._

“Lena, babe. Please stop pacing. I swear you’ll wear a hole on my floor and I won’t get my deposit back.” She said trying to make the brunette laugh but instead, she heard a groan.

“Kara.” A whine now.

“What’s got you all panicky at…” she glanced at the clock, “…7:09 in the morning?”

“Please tell me you didn’t forget.” She can hear the begging in Lena’s tone. No. She definitely did not.

“No. I didn’t.” She said placing her feet on the floor as she tied her hair in a messy bun. “Come here, please?” The younger woman obliged and crawled to Kara’s side of the bed and Kara hugged her and perched her on her lap so Lena could cuddle in her arms. She was the epitome of a koala. _Cute._

“I’m just really nervous.” Lena whispers. Of course. Even Kara would be nervous if she was in Lena’s position. But nope. She wasn’t and Lena needs her to comfort and assure her in this mild moment of panic.

“Lena. You don’t have to be nervous. You’ve met Alex already.” Yes. Lena and Alex had met in passing when Alex needed to drop something at Kara’s apartment. It was a quick moment but since then, it had been a good thing because Alex seemed to have liked Lena even though her face doesn’t show it. Alex really needed to work on her face. _Sorry, sis._

“I know. But that was like one time. We always planned to meet and we can’t even get to make it happen because either I’m busy or she is or you’re not around or there’s something that needs to be done. And now that I’ll officially meet her, to my extreme luck, your mom would be there too!”

Oh.

_Oh._

So, this was where the panic was coming from. She was scared of meeting Kara’s mom. She can really understand Lena’s reaction to this. The thought of meeting _The_ Lillian Luthor was already making her faint, what more if she meets the woman in person? Would she make a complete idiot of herself? Embarrass herself? What if Lillian doesn’t like her? This must be Lena’s thoughts too. If there was one thing that she is sure of, it’s Lena’s constant need to make everything perfect. From her boardroom meetings, to their simple get togethers, Lena wanted them all spot clean and on the schedule. But this was something bigger than that and she can feel it with the way Lena was behaving.

“Babe. Do you think Eliza’s not going to like you?” There was a small nod from where Lena was placed in between her shoulder and neck. She kissed Lena’s temple as a gesture to calm her down. “Mom’s going to like you. She’ll definitely love you! How can she not?” She tried to assure her but clearly the other woman was having none of it.

“Darling. This is your mom we’re talking about. She raised you after you were adopted. Of course, I’ll think about the worst. I just want her to like me so badly. I don’t want to disappoint you or make her mad at you for being with me.” She said in a very small voice. “I want her to like me so she’ll have a good reason to not take you away from me.”

This information broke Kara’s heart to hear Lena say these things. She was sure that Eliza would love Lena. She would gush about her through the journals that she read that Lena’s made or the small accomplishments she did to make the world a better place and Eliza would gladly agree with her. It was sad to see Lena like this, but this had to come from something deeper. There was fear and it was making Lena sad.

“May I know why you’re thinking these things?” She asked gently and Lena hugged her tighter than she was doing before.

“I don’t want to come off as insensitive, Kara. I’m just really nervous.”

“I won’t force you if you don’t want to talk about it. I’m all ears if you want to, but I want to assure you that Eliza is a fan of yours. You don’t need to impress her. She’ll love you in a heartbeat.” And with that Lena smiles and kisses her jaw. “Let me just fix myself and then we’ll get groceries for your meticulously prepared list for tonight’s dinner!” She teased and placed Lena at the bed, giving the CEO a kiss on the forehead.

\---

“I took a quick scan at your cabinet and you don’t really have a lot of food stocked besides cereals and a lot of sweet things.” Lena said as they were scanning the grocery isle.

“I barely have time to cook, I can barely even make you a decent breakfast or even do grocery. Besides, that’s what fast food is for. I can live out on delivery.”

“But you know that you have to eat healthy, Kara.” Lena chastised her like a scolding mother. Wow, she would definitely get along with Eliza and Alex if the scolding is anything to get by. “We’re getting you fruits and some vegetables. I’ll add that for tonight’s menu.”

“But Lena…” she whines, “French fries are vegetables. Burger has lettuce and tomato. I eat healthy.”

“Don’t play smart on me now, Danvers.” She can literally hear her girlfriends eye rolling at the words as she moved ahead of Kara scanning at the pasta selection. _Golly_ , she was really smitten. “On top of that, we’ll stock you with healthy snacks. No arguments on that one.”

“Sure, mom.”

“Did you just really call me mom?” Lena turned around and eyed her in a way Kara can’t read but it was not a safe look.

_Gulp._

Lena walked towards her in a way that’s too sexy for her to even comprehend and her brain melts in an instant. “Didn’t knew that you had in in you, darling.” The younger CEO said with a smirk. And she was sure that her face was fifty shades of red.

“Lena! I wasn’t—I didn’t – it’s not like that. You know I would not—” and she hears the brunette laughing in front of her and her hands were clutched in her stomach as if trying to prove that she really found this hilarious. “Now you’re just being mean.” She pouted and she received a quick peck on her lips with a few fading giggles from the woman in front of her.

“You really look cute when you ramble.” She was still giggling but was slowly gaining her composure like the elegant woman that she always is. “I just needed to tease you. I’m sorry, darling.”

Kara just continued to pout and huffed as a show of mock annoyance. Lena relented and gave her a quick hug and a peck on the lips once more. Who would have known that Lena had no issues with PDA? “How about we eat Pizza and pot stickers for lunch because you need to eat vegetables in the evening?”

Well that was a good bargain.

“Fine. You win.” It was just easy. She doesn’t know if she can ever say no to Lena. She’ll never say no to Lena.

“I always do.” Lena whispered and Kara was a goner. “And no, we are not buying 8 boxes of Fruit Loops, Kara Danvers. Put them back.”

“But Lena!” This time, no amount of pout can change Lena’s mind.

\---

“Do you think your mom and sister would like what we prepared? It looks simple! I should have prepared more.” Lena asked nervously.

Glancing at the table, Kara can’t help but release a soft chuckle and shake her head. This definitely wasn’t _simple._ Lena prepared a whole lot of options for them. Lasagna, because she learned that Eliza loved them and good thing Lena was really good with cooking. She made baked chicken breasts with a side of buttered potatoes in exchange of fries because _I really want fries Lena_ and this was the closest that Kara would get. For dessert, the brunette made a simple chocolate fudge cake. They also had ice cream in the fridge just in case of emergency because _what if you’re sister doesn’t like the cake I made? It’s good to have a spare dessert._

And the wine.

Of course.

There is wine because Lena wanted to make sure that this would be a good dinner for them so what better way to do it than put wine in the picture? But because she learned that Alex was more of a scotch kind of girl, she went all the way and brought not one bottle, but 5 bottles because she really doesn’t know what Alex would like.

And she can really understand Lena’s nervousness but she can’t help but pull the poor woman into her arms and comfort her.

“Lena. You don’t have to be nervous. Babe, you did well. Even I am impressed. I knew you could cook but wow. I wish we can eat right now.”

“Easy for you to say because you’re not nervous.” She groaned. “And you can’t eat yet. We have to wait for them.” Lena said as she buries her face to Kara’s neck. This was one of Kara’s favorite moments. Ever since they started dating, Kara had learned a lot about Lena. One of them is that she loves to be hugged like this. In a way that she is being shielded from everything that seems to be overwhelming her. It was a pure delight to see and she was happy to give into Lena’s needs. Even if it’s just a hug.

“Fine. Go ahead. I know that you want to fix yourself even though you’re so fine already.” Kara said as she detached herself from Lena and gave the girls some space to kiss her quickly and head towards her bedroom where her clothes for tonight were.

Contrary to what Lena thinks, Kara is actually nervous about this whole situation.

Why?

Because she never really introduced someone so formally to Eliza. Sure, Alex had known a few and by extension her mom but there was never a chance to meet Eliza. She was too far away and some of her relationships ended faster even before they wanted to start.

So, yeah. She was nervous too. Because clearly, Eliza and Alex would be embarrassing her in front of her very confident, smart, amazing and gorgeous girlfriend.

_Good luck to me._

She needed to busy herself while waiting for Lena because she can really take a while. Lena was not a vain person, that she learned. She was already beautiful without trying, but Lena always wanted to look presentable even in the simplest of ways. Lena can wear trashy shirts and yoga pants all day and Kara would still think that she can destroy an entire run way.

Was she biased?

No. Absolutely not. She wasn’t. Lena was just really freaking gorgeous. Thinking about Lena being so beautiful sometimes makes Kara’s heart ache. Not in a bad way but in a very _different_ way. However, she had a task to do and that was to set the table and make sure that everything was prepared before Lena gets out of the room.

What she sees next doesn’t really made her prepared.

Lena walked in wearing a not so expensive dress because Kara had warned her that she just needed to go casual. They wouldn’t want Eliza to think that Lena came straight from work with her signature office attire that are not always _office_ safe in Kara’s eyes. But that dress still does something to Kara. She can’t help but stare at her. Green eyes were definitely on hers.

Lena was wearing a deep green dress that stopped just above Lena’s thighs with long sleeves that hugged her arms nicely. Her hair was down and Kara was certain air had stopped coming into her system because she always loved how Lena’s hair looks so beautiful especially when they’re relaxed and free. The cut was not too low so it doesn’t expose much of Lena’s cleavage which Kara is _thankful_ for, but there was a good amount of collarbone showing and it made Kara’s head reeling.

She felt fingers under her chin that made a motion to close her mouth. _Was her mouth hanging open all this time? When did that happen?_

“I think that answers my question.” Lena chuckles _. What question?_

“Sorry, what was your question?” She asked fiddling with her glasses. She didn’t even notice that Lena was talking. _Good game, Kara._ This earned her one of her favorite sounds in the world which was the soft laugh that Lena gives her when she sees Kara flustered.

“I was asking if I look presentable.”

_Darn. You look more than presentable._

“Thank you, darling.” There was strange lilt in Lena’s voice with how she said the word darling added with a bit if a sly smirk. But wait _, did I just say that out loud?_ Lena was looking bashful now.

There was the distinct knock at her door and she already knew who was behind it and just like that, Lena’s confident demeanor was replaced by nervousness again. Kara saw the shift and squeezed Lena’s hand.

“Hey. Stop overthinking, okay? You’ve got this. Just be yourself.” She said to Lena softly.

“Thank you, Kara. I really appreciate you comforting me.” Lena said bringing her hands to Kara’s neck and connecting their foreheads together. This was always their gesture of calmness. It always helps. But right now, it doesn’t really help Kara.

“I really want to kiss you right now but I guess they’re here.” She said.

“Open the door. I don’t want your mother to think that we’re doing something NSFW before they arrive.” Lena smirked and that got Kara to shift and her cheeks are definitely colored pink. Clearly as of the moment, it wasn’t her mother thinking that. Nope. She doesn’t want to think about anything like that.

She needs to survive this dinner.

NSFW thoughts be damned.

She opened the door and she was pushed by the force of her mother hugging her. “Sweet heart, I missed you. It’s been a long time.” Eliza said.

“I missed you too, mom.” It was not weird for her. She couldn’t bring herself to not call Eliza her mom especially after what she had done for her. Her mom wouldn’t really mind she was sure of that. She hugged her as tight as how Eliza was hugging her. Alex gave her a quick pat at her head and headed inside.

“And you must be Lena.” Eliza said as she saw the raven-haired woman behind her. Kara glanced at her girlfriend and saw that she was still fidgeting but was less nervous than earlier.

“Yes. It’s lovely to meet you Mrs. Danvers.” Lena greeted with a smile on her face, her arms stretched for a hand shake.

“Oh dear.” Eliza chuckled and she saw Lena’s hand froze. “We don’t do handshakes in this family. Get in here.” And with that, Lena was squeezed into a tight hug courtesy of her adoptive mother. “It’s really lovely to meet you too. Please call me Eliza.” She saw Lena hugged Eliza back albeit a bit hesitant. “I heard so much about you from Kara.”

“All good things I hope.” Lena said as she extracted herself slowly from Eliza.

“Well, she really can’t say anything bad about you, you know.” Alex said from behind. “Alex Danvers. Finally, glad to meet the woman whom my sister can never really shut up about.” Alex stretched out a hand. She appreciated how Alex gestured the hand shake in a polite way. Alex was definitely not a hugger like her and her parents. She thinks sometimes that maybe Alex was the one adopted. She was way more Danvers’ than she is.

Kara can’t help but gulp as she saw the way Lena was eyeing here from where she was standing. She was very open about how she felt for Lena even to Lena herself but this was still a different level of embarrassment. She wished she can fast forward to dinner already.

“Lena Luthor. Glad to meet you too. Last time we saw each other was a bit of a rush, but I have to say that I looked forward to meeting you all.” She said in a regal but very genuine way.

“And I’m starving!” She interrupted the moment just so they can all move on. Dinner always makes everything easier. “Lena cooked a lot and she is great cook I can prove it.” She gestured towards the table and she heard Alex chuckle.

“You must be really good. Kara eats a lot.” Alex says as she puts her coat at the rack and took her mother’s.

“I love cooking and yes, I can agree that Kara eats a lot.” Lena answers easily as she sat down beside Kara. Eliza was seated across her and Alex was in front of Lena. “But I won’t complain.” The young CEO adds.

“This is definitely a feast.” Eliza beamed and gave Lena a soft smile that made Kara’s heart melt. She knew that Eliza meant every word of it. Surely her mother noticed how the younger Luthor is nervous because of the amount of food that they have but she didn’t say a word. Just appreciated it and thank their host for the night.

“I didn’t know what you liked but I hope this helps.” Lena says shyly.

“She wanted to make a good impression.” Kara added in a teasing way and she can feel Lena’s eyes on her but she wasn’t mad. The young woman’s eyes translate to _traitor_ and she couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Well dear, you don’t have to impress me. I am already impressed before I met you.” Eliza said easily and she could have sworn that Lena was glowing with those words. “I have heard a lot about you and the good that you do. I can say that I admire all your work, business or science related.”

“See, I told you she’ll love you.” She whispered into Lena’s ears and Lena just rolled her eyes fondly.

“Thank you, Eliza. That means a lot to me.” Lena says in a shy manner that made her beautiful all the more but Kara was just beaming with pride. Not in a gay way but yes, she is still a gay mess around Lena.

They have started trading stories about Eliza’s travel. She came from Midvale, Kara and Alex’s hometown and only a had a few days to visit. Apparently, Eliza was around to attend a conference related to her field of science and both her and Lena fell into an easy conversation tagging Alex along with them too. They were all cute science nerds but Kara never felt out of place. She was just fascinated in the fact that her favorite person and two of the most important women in her life were actually getting along.

“I’m glad to have met Kara. I wouldn’t be able to be better without her.” She heard Lena say from beside her and the younger woman was looking at her with clear adoration in her eyes.

“That’s all I can ask. I’m really happy for the both of you.” Eliza said and Alex just hummed in response. Her sister was busy sipping her scotch that made her roll her eyes. She swears that sometimes Alex can have problems with her drinking but she’ll survive.

They shifted to more comfortable topics like Kara’s childhood together with Alex as they transferred from the dining table to the living room. And Kara knew this was not a good idea.

“I swear. I was laughing when she went home one day carrying a cat who clearly belonged to somebody else. She was covered in mud, twigs and leaves and I wasn’t able to recognize her. When I asked her what happened, she told me that she found the cat by the stream and she needed to make sure that he won’t drown.” Eliza told Lena animatedly.

“How would I have known that he had an owner? He was clearly homeless!” She whined.

“He did. He had a collar. You’re just lucky that the owner actually gave the cat to you because they can’t bring the cat to where they were going.”

“Streaky was a good cat.” She huffed and Lena looked at her fondly.

“I’m sure he was darling.” Lena kissed Kara’s cheeks and that made Kara soften a bit. She wasn’t annoyed really. She just liked it when Lena kissed her cheeks and all that. Eliza got up and went to the dining room to help herself some tea and Lena joined her. She was happy to see that Lena had eased up to Eliza and she was easy around her. All signs of nervousness gone and replaced by confidence, happiness and fondness. They were really having a great time talking and Lena wasn’t even doing it to impress Kara that she’s good with her mother. Her girlfriend actually wanted to be close to her mom even without Kara in the picture which made her happier. She just watched as the two of them talked while waiting for the water to boil.

“You look good.” Alex said as she took the seat beside her.

“Well, don’t I look good before?” She asked with a smug look. She knew she was good looking, she just needed to rub in in Alex’s face.

“Stop being a smart ass. You know what I mean.” Her sister rolled her eyes. “Happiness looks good on you.”

“Yeah, and happiness is good looking too. Very good looking.” She said as she glanced at Lena and her wonderful dress that hugged her in all the right places.

“Kara, gross. I did not need to hear that.”

“What?” She asked.

“Do not look at her as if you want to jump her here. There are still people here Kara, keep it to your pants a bit more. Maybe after we leave.” Alex said while making a fake gag noise.

“What? No—I didn’t – Not like that! Alex! We never even did the deed yet!” Kara said in a low voice but hissed at her sister at the same time.

“What do you mean you never did the _deed?_ ” Alex asked her as if she really didn’t understand what Kara was trying to say. She eyed Kara and she just looked back at her sister with equal look on her eye. She was mortified. She didn’t want to have this conversation with her sister but she needed Alex to know that they haven’t crossed that bridge yet. To her relief, her sister seemed to understand the message.

“Oh.”

“Yes, oh.” She said back.

“You mean you haven’t?” Alex gestured her palms in a weird way that made Kara choke on her own saliva.

“Stop that! You’re making it weird.” Kara said as she hid her face on one of the pillows of her couch.

“No wonder you look at her like that. You haven’t gotten any yet.”

“Please don’t say it like that.” She groaned.

“But why? I mean, not that I want to know why you want to do it in the first place but you’ve been together for a time now. I was just curious.”

Kara glanced at Lena who was still happily talking to Eliza as she leaned over the bar and listened eagerly to what Eliza was saying. Why? It wasn’t like they were in a rush. There were times that they almost did it. They would make out a lot and there was heavy petting but it never goes far from that. Did she think about it? Absolutely. How can she not when Lena was being so, _Lena?_

She was sexy and she is allure personified. And sometimes, Kara was only human and she would definitely tell Alex that she relieves herself on her own sometimes just thinking about Lena but then again, she was only human.

Why? Maybe because a part of her is still worried that Lena wasn’t wholly hers. She still remembers the photos of Andrea in Lena’s apartment. She still hasn’t brought it up until now because she wasn’t that petty. Andrea was a big part of Lena’s life and she wants Lena to keep it until she wants too. We keep the ones we love with us no matter how long they have been gone.

And there was still the ring. But she couldn’t care less. Because as of the moment, Lena was still with her. And she chose her.

“I just want to her set the pace.” She says softly. “Up to now, I still can’t believe that she’s with me. She’s been through a lot since Andrea and I can never come close, but I don’t want to rush her. We’ll get there when we get there but I just want to make her feel that I’m alright with everything. Even it means to not do anything on a different level so I can get to be with her.”

“Wow. You really have it bad.”

“I do. I really do.” She chuckled.

“Just know that you can always be honest with her. I can tell that she really cares a lot about you. But you have to tell her the things that you feel.” Alex said as she touched Kara’s shoulder.

“I will.”

\---

Much later, Alex and Eliza said their goodbyes and thanks to both Kara and Lena.

“Thank you for the lovely evening. I wish we can do this some other time soon.” Eliza said as she hugged them both. “We should bring Maggie!”

“Sure mom, when she’s not busy.” Alex answered.

“Tell me when you get home, okay? Thanks for tonight both of you.” Kara said hugging her sister and mother in return.

“I’m really happy you’ve met Lena. I like her a lot.”

“What a relief.” Kara joked and her mother just giggled. Not soon enough, it was just her and Lena left in her apartment.

“That went well?” She said looking at Lena with a wide smile on her face. The brunette was mirroring her own smile.

“That was a success yes!” Lena said happily. She almost jumped in pure joy and Kara found it cute the way Lena had seemed to stop herself from doing so.

“I told you they’d love you.”

“I was nervous when they came but Eliza was such an angel. I loved talking to her.”

“And she likes you too. She told me before she left, so you can breathe and live as a normal person already.”

“Thank you, darling. I wouldn’t have done all this without you.” Lena said as she wrapped her arms around Kara’s neck kissing her with a soft kiss. “Anything for you, M’lady.” And Lena just giggled. They both transferred into the couch and cuddled over a movie that was playing on the TV when Lena suddenly stared at Kara.

“Anything wrong?” She asked. Lena was looking at her with complete awe and it made her heart melt. Lena touched her face and she looked like she wanted to say something and was just gathering all the courage she needed. Lena powered through.

“Andrea’s parents, they never liked me.” Lena said softly as she hugged Kara and laid her face on the crook of her neck. “I never actually got their approval for Andrea but we still managed. I wasn’t exactly in good terms with them but we were civil. That’s why I was really trying to impress your mom and Alex. I wanted them to like me so they wouldn’t give you reasons to leave me.” She said and Kara can feel tears wetting her neck.

That was why. Lena was scared that it will happen again. It pained her to think that somebody wouldn’t want Lena in their life. She was an amazing person and it pained her more that it was the parents of her dead lover that didn’t like her to be part of their family. She hugged Lena and comforted her to the best that she can.

“Lena.” She whispered. “I will always want you too, even if my family won’t approve. I want you to know that I am all in. Remember? But of course, my family sees how much of a great person you are and I’m glad that they share the same views as much as I do.” She heard Lena sniffle from her neck.

“I’m sorry to hear about that though. It wasn’t fair. I’m glad that despite the circumstances, your relationship pushed through. Andrea is brave and I believe she loved you very much.” She said. There was no pain in her words. Just pure respect to Andrea because she treated Lena the way that she deserves to be treated. She said a silent thank you to the heavens and hope that Andrea would hear her.

“Thank you, darling. And now I have you. I’m just really happy that your mom and sister likes me.”

“Wait till you meet my friends.” She chuckled and Lena groaned. “I’m a package deal, you want me, you’ll have them too.

“Fine.” Lena said and she lifted herself from where she was positioned and focused on Kara’s eyes. “Now, enough talking and just kiss me.”

And just like that, Kara can never say no to Lena.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you liked about it and maybe a little suggestion on what you want to see next?   
> Let's try to put them on the next chapters if it works. 
> 
> Hit me on tumblr @songstoponder. Thanks for all the support guys!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The talk has arrived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being so patient guys! Sorry for bringing in the updates so late I was really trying to fix some things personally. But thanks for the wonderful comments from last time. 
> 
> Sorry in advance for any errors. I had no time to reread. hahaha.
> 
> Here's another chapter for y'all.

“What do you mean that Kara doesn’t want to have sex with you?”

“Samantha! Lower your voice!” She chastised her friend. It wouldn’t have been an embarrassing conversation, but as of now they were currently having lunch in a very good restaurant surrounded by a huge number of people.

“Okay, sorry.” Sam said lowering her voice. “Okay, so say that again, dear.”

“I said it already, I don’t think she wants to that do that with me.” She said thinking about it. After their dinner last time with her sister and mother, Lena had all the plans of making sure that somehow, she would be able to make Kara break her resolve and just take her. She had been patient and the tension has been there a lot of times.

There were moments that they were so close to doing the deed but every time that they were almost there, Kara seems to stops and slow things down. It wasn’t like she was not patient about it, it’s just comes odd to her. They had a lot of heated moments and it always get thrown out when it all goes a bit steamier for them and it got her confused.

“I don’t think so, Lena. I think she has a reason. I see the way she looks at you.” Her friend assures her.

“Then why would that be the case?”

“Maybe she’s more of a get married first kind of girl?” Sam shrugged.

Well, that was an option but it just comes off weird for her because technically, Kara isn’t innocent. She remembered their first date and how Kara said that she wanted her too, and she was having a hard time controlling herself. But as of now, it seems that Kara has a lot of restraint that she keeps. Not that she doesn’t think that Kara was not entitled to her own pace but she just wanted to understand. She knew that she can just ask but she doesn’t want to come off as someone who is not respectful and impatient.

“I don’t think that’s the case.”

“Well, I know that you know this already, but I’ll still say it just in case.” Sam pauses and drops her fork on her plate. “Just ask her Lena.”

“I can’t just really ask her that. I can really wait for her. If that’s what she wants.”

“I know, honey but you said it yourself that it’s confusing. You’re both adults and you have to talk.” Sam told her calmly. However, what she heard next got her to actually thinking. “Have you ever thought that maybe she was waiting for you too?”

She opted to be quiet for a while because that really got her to thinking. Her silence had brought Sam talking again, taking her silence as a que to keep talking. “I mean, remember that between the two of you, you were the one who was in a relationship before you met her and you were engaged. Maybe she’s just waiting for you to take the next step.”

“But I am taking the next step!” She defended.

“I know, but that’s not what I meant.” She looked at her best friend a confusing look saying _what do you mean then?_ that had the other woman continuing. “I mean in a way that you need to talk about your past and how it wouldn’t really be a burden about what you both have right now. I think that’s what she’s waiting for.”

She was not expecting that.

“Remember when you told me the day that you went back to help her? She was literally comparing herself with Andrea and I don’t think she’s truly over that. Knowing her, she’s always respectful and very sensitive of other people’s emotions like it’s hers to begin with. She has a big heart and I think that she just wanted to make sure that you’re all good about it given your past hurts.”

“When you put it that way, that actually makes sense.” She said more to herself than the woman in front of her. “Kara is so sweet and very patient with me, that she’d do anything just to make me feel comfortable and taken care off.”

“Exactly. So, you better treat her right and talk to her before she really gets tired of you.”

That brought her to a halt. She was deep in thoughts and she knew that more than the issue of their intimacy, there was something deeper that needs to be addressed. She needed to convince Kara that she was all in into their relationship.

So, she left lunch early.

Sam wasn’t one to protest. She was Lena and Kara’s biggest shipper.

\---

Lena paced around her office when she went back.

She was sure that her secretary was ready to burst into the office and ask her what was happening because she was laser focused on pacing, not on her current meeting. She was just glad that Jess was ever so efficient and took notes and stirred the conversation away from her mind.

All of her thoughts began to drift back to Kara. Lena prided herself as a woman of excellence, professionalism and brilliance, but right now, not even a board meeting can take her thoughts back to the blonde reporter.

_Have you ever thought that maybe she was waiting for you too?_

This was what consumed her thought. How could she have been so stupid about it. Of course, thinking about it, Kara was always the one waiting for her. From the beginning and up until now, it was Kara giving her the ball of setting the pace. She wanted Lena to take things to the next level because she wanted her to be ready about everything even in the small details of their relationship.

How could she have not seen it. She blamed it to her inability to communicate properly. After Andrea, she was closed off and it was just that way. She assumed that Kara would just leap on with her because she wasn’t one to really talk too much about her feelings, but of course Kara took it as a sign that she wasn’t ready for them to take the next level, while clearly, the blonde was.

_She gave me a fucking key to her apartment!_ And that should have been a hint already.

She didn’t want to screw this up and she knew that Sam was right. She needed to talk to Kara and bring this confusion to a resolution. After a few more moments, she regains herself and zones back into the agenda of the board meeting. She needed to do this because she still had a company to run.

She’ll talk to Kara.

She has to.

\---

Three knocks after there was a loud thud from the other side of the door. “Coming!” Lena chuckled at the muffled sound that Kara was giving from the inside of her apartment. She had messaged Kara a while ago that she wanted to have dinner with her at the blonde’s apartment and it was a perfect moment to speak to Kara.

She was a business woman and she knew that time is always of the essence. She needed to address this now or she’ll just chicken out in the future. That’s what she does right now and she straightens herself as the door opens to show a slightly limping Kara Danvers on the door. Worry started to creep its way into her.

“Kara, what happened to you?” She said reaching out to her girlfriend’s shoulders.

“Nothing serious. I just tripped from the room.” So that explains the loud thud.

“Just be more careful, okay?” She says affectionately as Kara steps away a few from the door and let’s Lena come in.

“You know I gave you a key already, right? I don’t think the knocking was necessary.” Kara said as she grabbed Lena’s coat and hung it on the coat stand near her door.

“I like to make my entrances, I thought we established that already?”

“Yes, we did. Yes.” And Kara just chuckled at the idea of her being so extra. But Lena had a mission and she needed to do it soon.

“Darling, I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” Kara looked at her like she was getting ready to whatever Lena wanted to talk about. However, she heard Kara’s stomach grumble and decided that their talk can wait, because Kara was hungry, and apparently, a hungry girlfriend was not one she wanted to wait. Especially if it was Kara who inhales food lovingly more than anything else. “But we can talk about it after we eat. It’s nothings serious really.” She assured the blonde who was looking a bit nervous already.

“Okay, if you say so. I’ll just order in?” Kara asked still a little apprehensive about the whole talk ordeal so Lena knew she needed to do something.

“Darling.” She said as she hugged Kara and kissed her deep. “I swear it’s not something bad.” She chuckles.

“You’re not breaking up with me, are you?” Kara asked after she pulled out from the kiss.

“Of course not! Why did you think that?” Lena asked in disbelief. A part of her wanted to be mad because it seemed like Kara doesn’t trust her feelings for her, but part of her understands that this is something that she needs to address with Kara too. Definitely something to clear because Kara is scared and it’s making their relationship confusing for quite a while.

“I don’t know. It’s just you said you wanted to talk and nothing good ever comes from that line.” Kara brought her head down and connected her forehead with Lena’s. “I’m sorry if I made you feel that I don’t trust your feelings for me. I do, it’s just I have this fear sometimes. But I’m good now.”

“Don’t think about that, okay?” Lena said as she looked Kara in the eye and dragged her into the couch. “Now go and order food because I know that you’re hungry. I want to make sure you don’t get hungry so _you_ won’t break up with me.”

Kara laughed and it’s like the tension from earlier was gone. “Not going to happen.”

They ended up eating Thai food because Lena was complaining of all the times Kara orders Chinese. Kara tries to argue because _they’re both Asian cuisine, Lena so it really doesn’t make a difference._ But of course, she wins the argument and makes sure that they eat Thai tonight.

With potstickers. See? She let’s Kara win from time to time.

She wanted to do the talk in a way that Kara can be comfortable with her so she just made sure to start their night with the usual conversations they have about their day, her rants about old business man, how Lex is being so annoying because he wasn’t given a mash potato last time he ordered food service in one hotel he was staying at in the next state. They talked about Kara’s day and how Snapper, as usual, was under her skin.

Lena was nervous when Kara got up and took their take-out boxes to the trash can. Now she knew that they really are about to talk about the things that are putting a wall in their relationship. She knew the outcome she wanted; she just didn’t know how to start getting there. When Kara came back, she sat beside Lena, hugging her and dragging her down with her so she was now on top of Kara and now they were just cuddling. There was a moment of silence and Kara was the first one to break it.

“What’s going on in that brilliant mind of yours?” The blonde asked as she tuck a stray hair from Lena’s face. “What is it that you wanted to talk about?” It was so gentle and Lena knew that it was safe to talk about it, because at the end of the day, Kara was always one to understand and hear her out. That was one of the things that she loved about Kara. She opted to hug the blonde to gather all the courage that she needs before she asks the million-dollar question.

There was silence for a while and Kara just hugged her back.

Then she dove in.

“Why won’t you have sex with me?” She asks, her face still buried in Kara’s neck that made the question come out as muffled, but she knew that Kara heard her if the sudden stiffness was something to go by. Kara cleared her throat and Lena felt Kara’s hug become tighter and she buried her face in Lena’s hair kissing her temple.

“What makes you think that?”

“I don’t know.” Lena was embarrassed with this conversation but she needed to power through because aside from this, she wanted to assure Kara of her feelings for her. “I just feel like we’ve been together for a while but still we’re stuck in here. I’m not really saying that we should because I want to respect your pace too, but I just wanted to know because sometimes you’re just so hard to resist and I…” she cleared her throat, “…I think about doing it with you.” She continued to bury her face in Kara’s neck, she was certain that her face was so red out of embarrassment.

She felt Kara smile at her temple. But she didn’t say anything, she just waited for Lena to continue.

“And I know that you want to set the pace for me, but I think it’s something that we need to talk about, not only because I want to have sex with you…” She paused because she heard that Kara was chuckling so she opted to rise a bit so she can see the reporter’s face, who was actually chuckling a bit louder this time. “…what’s so funny?” She asked her eye brows raised but she isn’t really annoyed, this made her relax instead. That Kara was laughing at her.

“Nothing, it’s just you’re cute. Sorry, I won’t interrupt. Please continue, I want to know what you’re actually thinking about.” The blonde said in a calmer voice.

“As I was saying, I just wanted to know why, because clearly, there is a reason behind it. Although I have a slight hint at what that would be, I want it to come from you, because I want us to get past this, Kara. I really want to.” The reporter shifted and touched Lena’s chin tipping her to make eye contact with her.

“What do you want to know then?” Kara asked her gently. Making sure that their eyes are locked. She can feel the intensity in Kara’s eyes and it was making her forget all about this talk and just dive in through those pink lips that she enjoyed kissing.

“Earlier, you thought that I was breaking up with you. I know you didn’t mean it but you’re right, you made me feel like my feelings for you were not so deep. Do you really think that I’ll leave you, Kara? Do you not trust me enough?”

“No, I trust you too much actually.”

“I know you do, but you don’t actually want me to believe that when clearly something is going on in between us, something that I—we can’t seem to break. I want you to tell me things, even if you think that I can’t understand it, because I can. I will always try to be there for you, like how you are with me throughout this whole thing.”

Kara took her eyes away from her and stared at the ceiling, like what she needs to say was actually written up there. Lena to her credit just waited patiently. She wanted to make sure that Kara will take her time, it seems that they were on the same page now. That they wanted to talk about it and they are ready to talk about the heavy things.

“Okay. I’ll tell you.” Kara said as she closed her eyes. “But I want you to understand that even though I am saying this, I don’t want you to think that you owe me any explanation or that you are insensitive or anything.”

“Okay.” She whispered and Kara let out a soft sigh. There was a deep pause before Kara started to talk again.

“You still have your ring.”

_What?_

Then Lena took a quick glance at her finger and there she saw it. Her ring. Engagement ring. And this was what’s stopping her and Kara into taking the next step.

_Oh my god._

_How can I be so stupid!_

“Darling.” She pushed herself up and now she was just hovering over at Kara who was still closing her eyes. Her fingers touched the tip of Kara’s face that made the blonde open her eyes. Her eyes were so soft and Lena could feel that it was a big deal for Kara to let out that information out there.

“Why didn’t you tell me that sooner? I wish you did.” Her voice was so low because she didn’t want to break the silence that was bringing calmness to her nerves right now. Of course, Kara saw the ring and she was stupid to not think about it that way.

“Because I didn’t want you to think that I was pushing you to rush things with me.” Kara got up and that made them both sit up, Lena ended up straddling Kara. “And I don’t want you to think that you owe me any explanation for that matter. I know what you had for Andrea was special and I can never compare to her or to what you both had. That’s why I don’t want to rush things with you. Because you still have the ring and I just feel it’s unfair if I start making a move when clearly, you still have a part of her with you.”

Kara got up and Lena was left sitting in the chair dumbfounded. There was silence and it was not a good kind. She didn’t like the stillness of the moment.

“And I’m not saying that you need to disregard that small part that belongs to her just so we can move past things. Like I said before we even started, I’m content to be anything that you need Lena. I want to protect you and I will always be willing to wait for you.” Kara wasn’t really looking at her now but she knew that there were tears in the blonde’s face. “I want you so bad, Lena. I can’t control myself around you and I hope you don’t think that I don’t want to have sex because I do. Have you seen you? You literally take my breath away, but again. I don’t want you to think that you owe me this. You can take all the time that you need until you’re ready for me.”

“But I have to be honest, that it is hurting me a bit, Lena. That you’re with me but that ring is still with you.” Kara faced her this time and true enough there were tears staining her face. “It’s just confusing for me. And I don’t want to be petty about it, I know it’s not a big deal but that ring really throws away my confidence, knowing that I’ll never be the first person in your heart. I don’t want you to think that I’m being unfair. I just really wanted to let you know where all of this is coming from.”

Lena got up and hugged Kara. She was literally not expecting that revelation from her. “Oh, darling.” She just wanted to convey how sorry she was for bringing this up and making Kara feel this way. All this time, she thought that Kara was the one confusing her about her actions on their intimacy, when in fact, it was her. This ring that she loved so much was bringing this wonderful person to tears and was crying because she thought that she wasn’t enough for Lena. It broke her heart to see Kara like this.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” She said softly. Kara just hugged her back.

“I know you didn’t and you don’t need to be sorry. I understand I truly do. I’m just, really not good with this whole thing. I want you to know that I will be ready whenever you are. I’m not going anywhere, Lena.”

“It’s not that, darling. I—I feel awful because I clearly hurt you. To be honest, I haven’t remembered that I was wearing the ring all this time ever since we started dating.” It was true. Ever since she admitted that she liked the blonde, her ring was out of her mind in an instant. It just felt like an accessory to her like her other jewelry. At first, she wears it because she misses Andrea a lot, but it wasn’t the case right now. She just really wasn’t aware that she was wearing it this whole time.

“I swear that it felt like any other kind of accessory that I have. I would never really intentionally make you feel confused, Kara. I want you so much too.” Kara was just looking at her with teary eyes. “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I didn’t really know. I’m willing to let go of the ring just to make things easy for you. You’ve done a lot for me and I don’t want you to feel unwanted and that I am still hung up. I know that you’re right.” She sighed and touched Kara’s face wiping out the tear stain in her eyes.

“Andrea would always have a place in my heart, but you’re the one with me now. And I want to prove you that I don’t intend on changing that anytime soon. Even if it means letting go of this ring.” She says as she slowly takes the ring of her fingers. Kara tries to stop her but Lena just places her finger on Kara’s lips to stop her from talking. “I want you to be confident in us. Like how I’m confident about us.”

She places the ring on the coffee table and Kara just looks at her this entire time. Clearly, the blonde was still trying to be the bigger person of not pushing Lena to do this but she was having none of it. She made Kara cry and she wanted to correct that by making this small gesture. This was not exactly a small gesture for Kara, it was huge. A big step for the both of them.

“I don’t ever want you to think that I am not in this with you.” Her hands were back to Kara’s body this time and she was just stroking Kara’s strong arms. “I’m with you, Kara.” She brings her hands to Kara’s neck and leans closer. She kisses the side of Kara’s jaws and her nose and her cheeks. She settles lastly close to the reporter’s lips. Close enough that she can feel Kara’s breath in hers, her fingernails scratching the blonde’s nape that drew out a slight whimper from the other woman. “I’m yours.”

“Mine.” Kara whispered.

“Yes, darling. Yours.” She assured her and her lips were moving above Kara’s.

“Are you sure?” Kara asks her so damn gentle that it made Lena’s insides melt. It was all too much. How heavy the moment was earlier and shifted to something lighter but charged at the moment. She nodded to give the other woman an answer but it seems that Kara needed words because her hands were hesitating to touch or to hug Lena back. So, Lena said what the blonde was waiting for to all this time.

“Take me, Kara.”

And Kara takes her.

One minute they were standing and the other moment she was lifted so easy like she weighed nothing and her legs were wrapped around a very strong torso. Kara was kissing her so deep that all Lena could do was just savor the moment and enjoy the feeling of Kara needing and wanting her. It was a messy kiss, hot tongue inside her mouth and hands that gripped her ass just enough to elevate her. Lena knew that Kara was strong but this was a whole lot different level. Kara started kissing her jaws and her neck while easily lifting her and placing her against a wall. All she can do was moan and she wasn’t going to stop because it clearly was encouraging the reporter to go with it and not stop. She was hitting all the right places. This was the farthest that they have gone compared to the last months and Lena wasn’t going to let this stop. She had waited for this and she knew that deep down, they had waited long enough for this. Both of them, so she wasted no time and started to grind herself against Kara’s abs.

Kara seemed to get this as a cue and started to rub herself against Lena too and the CEO was certain that if she was to die tonight, she would have any regrets. It had been to long but she didn’t care. She wanted this and she was not going to stop. Kara to her credit felt this too and had carried Lena straight into the bed where she placed Lena softly into her bed and started to kiss her once more, discarding Lena’s top and her pants faster than Lena can ever remember.

She was now just in her lacy underwear.

“You came in prepared.” Kara teased her as the reporter started to stare at her body lying on the bed. “You planned this?”

Lena rolled her eyes and was beginning to be impatient with how Kara was stalling. “No more stalling, Kara.” She said as she grabbed Kara by the collar of her shirt and dragged her on top of her. “I did not plan this but I was damn sure that I would kill you if you don’t make your move now.” Kara’s eyes were wide all of a sudden and it changed from soft to something akin to predatory.

“Gosh, you’re so sexy.” Kara whispered and she began to kiss Lena hard once more.

“Just take me, darling. We’ve waited long enough.”

Kara delivers.

And Lena was so happy they had the heavy conversation earlier, because the next conversation they had was consisted of moans and grunts, pants, thrusts that brought her to another dimension.

All she can see was stars.

\---

She woke up to bright lights and a very, very naked body who was hugging her from behind. She knew that they needed to process and still talk about a lot of things but she was sure that they would be able to get past anything because it feels so right to be with Kara. She shifted in bed and saw that the blonde was still sleeping. Extracting herself from Kara was a great effort on her end. Firstly, because Kara had a solid grip and always brings her back to bed, however what makes it more difficult for her was the fact that she enjoyed looking at the sleeping Kara beside her.

It had been long since she last woke up with somebody next to her. It was Andrea obviously, but waking up next to Kara was so different from waking up from Andrea. It was not rushed; she just wanted to take her time and forget about the world from outside. She was happy that they were able to clear things right now and she wants things to stay that way.

The kitchen was her next destination after successfully getting out of Kara’s death grip. Not that she was complaining but she needed coffee and Kara would be hungry when she wakes up. She cooks regular breakfast for Kara. Pancakes, bacon, eggs, and a toast. Kara had a big appetite that makes her think how come she can still look so good despite eating a lot. She laughed at herself because she was literally ogling at Kara in her thoughts but was surprised when a set of hands was hugging her petite form from behind and started planting kisses on her neck.

“You’re up early.” Kara murmured. Clearly still sleepy.

“Its almost lunch, Kara.”

“We stayed up late.”

“I know, and whose fault is that?” Lena asked in amusement but the only answer she received was a soft grunt from Kara who was still fighting the sleep of her system. “I made you breakfast. Sit down so you can eat.” When she turned around, she just saw Kara staring at her with her mouth slightly ajar.

“What’s the problem?” She asked scanning around the kitchen to see if there was something bothering the blonde, who was clearly having a moment.

“You’re wearing my shirt.”

Oh.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to. I couldn’t find my—”

“No, it’s okay. You just look good with it.” Kara said with her face all red. She just shook her head and smiled at the blonde and gave her the plate of what she cooked. Kara started munching on the toast first.

“I like you in my shirt.” She heard Kara say in between bites. Lena smirked and quirked her eyebrow up.

“I like you on me.” She heard a choke that clearly was from Kara who seemed to have a hard time swallowing her bread. Being the nice girlfriend that she is, she handed orange juice to the other woman.

“You can’t just say things like that while I’m eating.” Kara eyed her playfully. “You’ll choke me to death.

“I’m into choking too.” Lena said easily and this earned another sound from Kara who had spat her drink out of her mouth. This made Lena laugh so hard.

“You’re not playing fair.” Kara whined and Lena was sure that she would do anything in her power to make sure that Kara would always remember that she was so happy that they were together.

“Sorry, darling.” She chuckled and stepped into Kara’s space in between her thighs to give her a quick kiss. She was happy that Kara had a high stool. It was easier for her to kiss Kara. “I don’t really play fair always.”

“Yeah I figured.” Kara rolls her eyes. “But I really like you in my shirt. You look so gorgeous.” Kara kissed her softly and Lena was happy to reciprocate.

“Thank you, darling.” She said as she kissed Kara deep and hard. “By the way…”

Kara looked at her waiting for what she has to say.

“I’m also not wearing underwear.”

“Lena!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think it'll just be a few more chapters before the story would end. I'm not really sure but we're almost to where some of the drama would happen. 
> 
> Tell me what you think and you can give me some prompts too!   
> Hit me at tumblr @songstoponder. 
> 
> 'Ciao!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I upped the rating on this one because there is a slight change. Thanks guys!   
> .  
> .  
> .  
> Let's continue...

“Are you looking at my scar again?” Kara asked while she was rubbing Lena’s head. Lena can say that this is her favorite place right now: in Kara’s chest. Naked.

“Yeah.” She said running her fingers on the edges. “I just… I feel good about seeing it.”

She saw Kara’s face blushed and it was cute. When she came here last night, she was ready to jump into the endless pit of being in Kara’s arms, and Lena knew that it was the easiest decision that she ever made. It wasn’t rocket science. She wanted to be in this very position.

“You don’t think it looks bad?” Kara asked her and Lena knew that Kara was either thinking about it not looking good or maybe that it was a reminder of some of her insecurities.

“It’s not.” She shuffles and looks at Kara in the eyes. “It makes you look more alive.” And she kisses her.

\---

“You look… you look like you just got laid?” Sam whispers as she squinted her eyes at a part of Lena’s neck that was completely covered by her long hair. Lena for her part just rolls her eyes at her friend and continued to listen to the person who was presenting at their meeting. However, the taller brunette wasn’t really having any of it because she just continued to stare at Lena until the CEO was able to give in.

“Shut up, Sam. I need you to focus on this meeting because in a few more days, you’re taking over my title.” She hissed quietly but not really in a mad way. She was always fond of her best friend and she doesn’t even have any idea why.

“Spill me the details later, okay?” And they go on. 

After a few more hours and a lot of altering on the way CatCo would be running and also the announcement of the transition to Sam, they were able to cover most of the meeting and Lena was just ready to get out of the office and jump into Kara’s office to see her before she needs to go to L-Corp. To her dismay, the blonde wasn’t in her seat but she did take a quick look at her phone to see that there was one quick message from Kara and her whereabouts.

“Lover girl isn’t here. I asked her if she can run a quick interview on Bruce Wayne.” Sam says as she sees Lena walk out of Kara’s office.

“Why must you always send her to the far places?”

“So you have time to actually miss her. You’re always mostly together. It’s too cute it’s sickening.” Sam gives her a fake gag.

“We’re supposed to see each other. She’s my girlfriend.”

“Yeah, right. Anyways…” Sam says as they walk straight to her office dragging Lena along with her. “…how was it?” Her best friend asks with her eyebrows wagging up and down and Lena knew that she needed to spill some details because she won’t be able to get away with it even if she tries hard to do so.

It wasn’t like she was embarrassed about it to talk to Sam, but she just wanted to keep it to herself if she was being honest. But she knew that she needed to say something at some point not because it was to gossip but because she wanted to share how happy she was with how things have progressed between her and Kara. After that time that they spent together, they can’t seem to take their hands off each other and if you’d ask her a year ago if she would ever feel this way again with another person, she would have said that it was a crazy question and would never happen.

Look at her now.

“That good?” She saw Sam grinning at her.

“I won’t go into the details, but she is pretty amazing.” The smile in her face gave away how deeply she feel for the blonde, not only intimately but to Kara as a person. “She’s really something.”

“I just want you to know that I am absolutely happy for you and I’m here for you all the way, okay?”

“I know and thank you for that. But enough of my personal life. I want to talk about the budget. Earlier in the presentation, I find it a bit odd. I know I’m not usually here but we seem to have been missing a few dollars for the last 3 years. I want this to be checked on.” She says as she flips over papers that she was reviewing.

“Yeah. It did come a little bit odd to me. I’ll dig in and tell you what needs to be done.”

“Can you take Lucy in this? I want her input specially she’s the lawyer and I guess if there are legal documents that involve this, she needs to be in the loop. I want this done as soon as possible.”

“Right at it, boss.” Sam gave her a dumb salute and proceeded to dial her phone to call their lawyer for the matter. As she was scrolling over laptop, she didn’t notice the blonde locks that were walking straight to Sam’s office, making her jump from her seat when a voice came into her line of hearing.

“Kara!”

“Hi. Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just came in.” The blonde has given her that cute dumb smile that she does whenever she’s feeling anxious about something.

“No worries, darling. I’m glad you’re here.” She said pulling the blonde into her space and kissing her cheeks. She heard a cough from behind her and almost forgot that Sam was still there.

“Not that I mind, but please keep it PG in here. We’re still in the office.” Her best friend says.

“Hi Sam!” Kara beams to Sam who was currently grinning at her, Kara on the other hand was blushing deep red. “I actually was able to get an interview with Mr. Wayne, but I wasn’t able to do it today. I have a scheduled meeting with him by next week.”

“That’s great, Kara. I knew I can count on you.” Sam said with confidence and Lena can’t help but feel pride for how efficient Kara really is, being her girlfriend or not, the blonde reporter was always on top of her game and ready to do anything that needs to be done and that’s one of the things that she loves about Kara.

“Thanks, boss. But what’s got you two all worked up?” She asked the both of them but her eyes were trained on Lena and it shows the worry in Kara’s eyes. She can’t help but feel grateful at how good Kara is at reading her even in a few months only of dating, and it’s made her heart full that Kara always wants to make sure that she’s all good. At this point, she needed to make sure that everything was fine and she promised to always tell Kara if something is wrong, so she proceeds to answer the question.

“We found something and we’re figuring out what the problem is. Nothing at this point yet, but that’s what we’re actually figuring out, but no need to worry. We have it under control.” She can feel Kara’s arm squeeze on her hips and she can tell that Kara was trying to understand that there are some lines that she can’t cross because she isn’t part of that department but it still feels good to have Kara as a support at times.

“Okay, but tell me if you two need anything.” She said looking at both Lena and Sam. “By the way, I needed to talk to you about something. Can I borrow Lena for a moment, Sam?” She looked at Sam eagerly and Lena wasn’t sure what Kara was going to talk to her about.

“Okay, but don’t make out in the office.” Sam teases and walks out, earning an eye roll from Kara. Lena knew that from the very beginning, Kara and Sam will always work well and get along. It wasn’t the fact that they both knew each other even before Lena came into the picture but it was more on the fact that Sam and Kara like each other and respect each other a lot. Lena knew that even if she wasn’t with Kara, Sam would still end up being one of Kara’s closest friends. But it’s still a relief that Sam approves of Kara. Hell, she literally gave Andrea a hard time before being willing to work with her. And by work, like literally work and not friendship at all. It took Andrea a long time to gain Sam’s affection but, in the end, they still got along very well, but with Kara, it was just really natural. Like their friendship was fate, and Lena wouldn’t want in any other way.

“What is it about, darling?” Lena asked as she dragged Kara over at the couch.

“Well, I’m pretty anxious about asking this and I don’t know if you’ll say yes, but I was really hoping that you will—but its totally fine if you won’t you know that I won’t force you to do something that you don’t want to do, because I respect you a lot and… I just want to know if you’re on board with it, but…” And Kara goes on full time rambling.

Lena can’t stop smiling at this point. “Kara, honey. Breath.” She said as she touched Kara’s arm to calm the blonde and Kara seemed to have relaxed at the touch. “There you go. Go straight to the question.” She received an enthusiastic nod but a bit dumb because it was too fast and Kara was being too cute for her own good.

“Erm…” Kara was fidgeting over her glasses. “I wanted to ask you to be my date on a wedding that I’ll be attending a few weeks from now.”

“Was that so hard?” Lena teased and Kara just huffed her nerves out and Lena can’t help but lean in and give a quick peck. She really doesn’t care if there is a full transparent glass separating them from the people outside. She just needed to kiss Kara.

“I mean, it wasn’t but I know you’re busy and all and I don’t want to assume that just because you’re my girlfriend means that you want to spend time with me especially on a wedding. I don’t want to impose, I guess.”

“Of course, I’d love to be your date.” Lena smiles at her and she can see Kara’s face light up. “Who’s wedding if you don’t mind me asking?”

“It’s actually my surgeons.”

“Oh.” She says a bit surprised. Surprised about what? She has no idea. Really.

“Is that okay?”

“Yes.” She smiles and thoughts came into her head. “Is it the surgeon who placed Andrea’s heart in you?”

Kara shuffles and fixes her glasses which were perfectly in good place, by the way. “Yeah. I hope that’s okay with you. I don’t know but sometimes, I don’t want you to think that I’m being insensitive especially if Andrea is the one involved.”

They have truly come a long way. Ever since that talk last time with Kara about what she feels, Lena had always been extra careful around the reporter but Kara was having none of it. There were walls that were brought down and Lena was happy to break them all if it means Kara would feel secure in their relationship too. But Kara was Kara, and she wanted to make sure that Lena was alright with everything, especially if her ex was involved.

“Darling. I want to be there with you. And I also want to take them for taking good care of you. If it wasn’t for her, we couldn’t have met.” She said placing her head in Kara’s shoulder and hugging her from the side. “Tell me the details and we’ll get ready. It’s her wedding but I’d like to be good looking too.” She teased.

“You don’t even have to try.” Kara tilted her head and she was looking at Lena in the eye. “You’re already good looking. And I’m sure that whatever happens or wherever we may be…” Kara places her fingers in Lena’s chin to level their eyes, their faces a few inches apart. “…you’re the most beautiful person for me.”

“You are so whipped, Lena.” They both pushed away from each other upon Sam’s arrival. And Kara just full on laughs.

“I’ll see you in a few, I just have to finish something.” Kara says standing up and giving Lena a quick peck and walked out, waving at Sam too.

“See? Totally whipped.” Lena just rolled her eyes at her best friend. Yeah, she totally is.

\---

A mess.

That’s what Lena is right now. And she’s not sure how she’s going to get out of it, but she knew that she needed too. Because this is Kara. And she wants to be with Kara but she didn’t know what the hell happened and why she forgot about it. It wasn’t fair and she didn’t really mean to. She’s not sure what she’s feeling guilty about.

The fact that she forgot about it, or the fact that she wasn’t even aware of it anymore.

And it wasn’t fair for Kara.

She knew that Kara wouldn’t make a big deal out of it, because Kara always understands. She’ll definitely understand. But this was different for Lena. They are both important to her. So, she really didn’t know what to do.

If you’d ask her what the hell was happening.

Well, this is how it all started.

\---

Kara met her the Saturday of the week before the wedding so they can do something about their dress and spend time a bit more. It had been a busy week and to Lena’s shock, she and Kara had been dating for 4 months already. It isn’t fairly long but Lena knew that before, she wouldn’t even entertain the idea to be with somebody.

It had not been just fun and all. There was drama, a lot of insecurities that needed to be broken, tears, but Lena won’t have it any other way. She wouldn’t have it any other way. Being with Kara was just so easy. It’s like breathing. You don’t think about it. You just do it. And right now, she was definitely breathing Kara in.

In that suit.

Tailor fit in her body.

“Does it look good?” Kara asks her as she spins around on the full body mirror in front of her.

“Does it look good? Are you kidding me?” Lena asked in disbelief. Sometimes, she doesn’t get why Kara can’t believe that she’s hot. Like look at that. Arms. For. Days.

“Hey, I want to know. Don’t scoff at me. Not all of us looks like they came out straight from a run way even with just a baggy shirt.” Kara rolls her eyes.

“You say that even if I’m not wearing anything.” Lena smirks and she knew she hit something when she heard Kara choke on air from where she was standing. She wasn’t sure but she thinks she heard Kara mutter something like _definitely when you’re naked_ that just made her smirk a little bit more.

“Just answer the question, Lena.” Kara rolls her eyes.

“Yes. It does look good on you. I’m afraid I have to tie you up to me at the wedding, make sure that no one actually tries to steal you away.” She teases and she sees Kara turn to her and look her straight into the eyes with much sincere fondness in her eyes.

“I wouldn’t let them steal me.” The blonde says while making her way to Lena and touching her arm. “I told you this and I will tell you again. I’m yours.”

And with that her heart just burst and she knew that deep in her heart, she wanted to say something that would definitely change their dynamics. Three words at the bottom of her stomach and that she wanted to say so much out loud specially when Kara was being just so sweet and assuring about how patient she is and about how sure she was about being Lena’s. And Lena can’t help but let her heart melt a little every time Kara looks at her with _love_ in her eyes.

She wasn’t stupid. She knew that Kara was loving.

But she didn’t know if Kara was feeling the same, and she was still playing with the thought of just saying the words out loud. Not that she didn’t want to, but she was not sure she was just having a hard time saying. But she knows. Deep down.

That what she feels is love.

For Kara.

So, she just kisses her. To say it. In her own way.

“And I’m yours too.”

And she thinks that she can settle with that for now. That they belong to each other. They belong.

“And you really look good in that suit. I suggest you take it so we can go ahead and find my dress. I want to make sure that I matches yours.” Lena grins. “And maybe we can do something about that dress after we’re done for the day. You know, within the lines of not really having a dress.” She says suggestively and gives Kara a sly smirk.

“Woman. Don’t try to be funny right now.” Kara scoffs but it was just to hide her red face. And she just laughs. Again, she hears a mutter from Kara that sounds like _tease._ Oh, there is definitely no teasing involved later. She knows it.

However, Kara was not convinced that she wasn’t a tease.

She was now fitting on her own dress that matches Kara’s. Kara had a dark blue navy suit, and her dress was a black one that stopped right before her knees, with a slit on the right side just about mid-thigh. Showing a bit of her cleavage and her collar on full display with sleeves that were just over her shoulders.

Nope.

She was a tease and she was doing it on purpose especially if Kara was looking at her like that. She was doing a pretty good job at it really.

“Now you look really good in that.” Her girlfriend says in awe. Lena can’t help but blush at the compliment and it certainly boosted her ego. Kara never failed to compliment her when she had the chance to do so. Given any moment, Lena was sure that Kara would grab every opportunity to compliment her. And she was going to bask in it.

“Thank you, darling. I like it too. It matches your suit.” Lena said twirling innocently. “I think I’ll take this. Do you mind helping me? I don’t think I can unzip it.” She saw Kara stand up abruptly from the mirror and she was laughing internally at how eager the blonde seemed to be. “Sure.” And Kara followed her from inside the fitting room.

Kara was at her back in a few moments and started to unzip her dress slowly. The blonde was definitely taking her time and Lena was certain that this time, she wasn’t even teasing Kara. When the zipper was down, she felt Kara’s fingers run over her spine and suddenly, lips were glued at her nape.

“Lena.” Kara whispered and Lena almost felt like her legs turned into jelly with how Kara said her name in a breathy way. Kara started kissing her neck from behind and her lips were now at the back of her ears, nibbling and sucking a delicate part that makes Lena moan.

Suddenly, Kara’s hands were pulling the dress down from Lena’s body slowly and she didn’t stop kissing her shoulders and her spine. She felt soft fingers run over her skin in small touches and Kara’s lips were now on her neck, sucking slowly and biting her in the right places. Her hands shot up and pulled Kara closer into her, her hands came to Kara’s head and the blonde’s arms were now around her waist pulling her closer until their hips were touching, and all Lena can feel was a certain fire in her belly that she wasn’t sure she can be able to control right now. Not when Kara was doing things to her.

The blonde’s hands were now on her breasts, massaging and caressing her from behind and Lena found this extremely hot. Who knew that Kara had it in her? To do this at a public place. She was so turned on that she shifted so she was face to face with Kara, the dress pooling on her ankle and she was now only on her lacy red underwear, kissing Kara hard. Kara kissed her back with equal pressure and intensity and the blonde’s hands were grabbing her from the behind. A moan escaped from her mouth as Kara pressed their hips together and started rubbing herself on Lena. All thoughts of shopping are now right out of the window and she just wanted to continue what they were doing. So, she pressed herself more to Kara’s and the reporter just obliged. Just as Kara was sliding her hands to Lena’s navel, her phone rang and immediately Kara was kissing Lena slower this time, getting her phone from her pockets.

But Lena was having none of it. “Kara Danvers, you get back here this instant.” She whispered as she tried to drag Kara’s face back to hers. Kara just giggled and placed a small kiss to her lips. “Sorry, babe. It’s Snapper, he might be asking about how I’m going about my story.”

Lena groaned. “But it’s Saturday!”

“Yes, and he’s Snapper.” She smiled and gave Lena one last peck before turning around, but also giving Lena one last glance before answering the phone. “That’s what you get for being such a tease. And hurry up, I’m starving and it’s not even a euphemism.” And then she’s out of the room.

_Ugh. And she says I’m the tease._

“I heard that.” Kara said from behind the door. She just rolls her eyes.

\----

They were back in Lena’s apartment after the long day and after dinner. Lena was grumpy and she knew that Kara noticed it. She really doesn’t care if Kara would find it childish if Lena was grumpy about something, but she was just so turned on that she was pissed at Kara even though the blonde was not at fault. It was her fault for being a tease, but she was being petty about it.

“Lena. What’s wrong?” Kara said as she placed everything that they brought from today’s activities son the kitchen counter.

“Nothing.” Lena huffed. She wasn’t mad. But she was just petty at the moment and Kara didn’t deserve to be snapped at so it’s better to just keep it to herself.

“I know that something’s bothering you. You can’t tell me otherwise because I know it when your pissed or something.”

“It’s nothing. It’s petty. Don’t mind me.”

“Lena.” Kara asked looping her arms around Lena’s waist. “Tell me. Have I done something that made you feel bad today?” Lena just shook her head and buried her face on Kara’s neck. Now Kara was just being plain sweet and she’s embarrassed to say what got her so riled up, when clearly Kara didn’t have any clue.

“Tell me, baby.” _Whoops. There it goes._

“You turned me on today, and you’re not doing anything about it. And you’re calling me a tease when clearly, you’re the one who left me dry today.” She said with her face still buried in Kara’s neck. She can feel Kara’s chuckle through the vibration of her throat. “What’s so funny?”

“Oh, Lena.” Kara said hugging her tighter this time. “You have no idea how lame I am at keeping my cool around you.” Lena took a glance at the blonde and right there, all she can see is Kara’s intense stare at her own eyes that was burning with desire. The way Kara was letting her hands roam right now was in indication that…

Oh.

“Oh.”

“Yep. So…” Kara said as she took a step and now, she had Lena locked between her and the counter. “…you better be ready because you were such a tease all day.” And with that, Kara started kissing Lena hot and it took the young Luthor by surprise. It was a total turn on when Kara was the one taking control. Lena had no problem with who was top or bottom and all that dynamics but she was not one to complain especially when shy, timid and goofy Kara Danvers was the one in charge.

Like right now.

As Kara was kissing her, she started to take Lena’s top off and tossed it somewhere they both know would be a spot near the dining table and suddenly Lena was wrapping her legs around Kara as the blonde placed her on top of the counter. Usually, Kara would take her time with Lena, but right now that wasn’t the case. Kara suddenly got rid of her lacy bra and tossed it and she doesn’t care if it lands somewhere as long as she has Kara’s hot mouth on her right away.

And of course, Kara delivers.

Her mouth went straight right to her hard nipples and all Lena can do was to push Kara into her and let her have her fill of her breasts. The blonde’s other hand was massaging the other nipple so it would have equal attention and Lena just wrapped her legs tighter against Kara’s hips for leverage. She heard her belt was being detached from her pants and all of a sudden Kara pulled her pants away from her body in one swift move that left her in her panty’s. If Lena wasn’t turned on then, she _definitely_ is turned on now. Kara lifts her up but doesn’t stop on kissing her until she was placed on her bed.

Softly, but with urgency.

As she was laid on her bed, she can literally feel Kara’s eyes all over her body. And she can’t help but tease the reporter about it.

“Like what you see, darling?” She said in a very deep voice. But to her surprise, Kara didn’t give her an answer but was suddenly placing her hand over her shoulder and taking her top off swiftly like it was burning her skin and all Lena can see was Kara.

Abs.

Muscles.

Strong arms.

That bad ass scar.

And Kara. Just plain Kara looking at her with hungry stares.

“Like what you see?” Kara was the one teasing this time and Lena can’t help but groan.

“I swear if you don’t get down here in three, I will kick you—oomph.” She was stopped by Kara’s lips who was kissing her hard again and laying on top of her. She wasn’t sure when it happened but after a few more moments into their heated kiss, Kara’s bra was off and her pants are nowhere to be found.

And Lena?

Lena was now fully naked. Somewhere between Kara seemed to have ripped the garment and tossed it somewhere. Lena flipped them over so that Kara was laid down and she was now on top of Kara, her hands now on Kara’s shoulders and her center was now in Kara’s abs. The blonde held her waist and started to guide Lena to rock her hips against her and all Lena can do was bite her lip and moan and she was sure that she was about to come just by the hardness of these abs that she was now grinding on.

“Go, baby. You feel so good.” Kara encourages her and so she does because she’s just turned on and Kara was moaning too. She felt her hips thrust more into Kara and now the blonde had her fingers between her abs and Lena and the CEO almost jumped when she felt Kara’s fingers brush over her clit, and it felt so good that she almost cried.

“Kara.” She said in a shaky breath.

“Shhh. Just go baby, you’re so beautiful like that.” And she did until her legs started to give out on her and she came with just grinding at Kara like that. “Good girl.” She heard Kara say. But it seems that Kara wasn’t done yet, at least not now because even before she can recover from her high courtesy for the blonde reporter, she was being flipped over and now she was the one lying on bed and Kara on top of her in between her legs.

“You’re so gorgeous, Lena.” Kara said into her ear as she started to kiss Lena from her neck down to her chest. Again, she gave equal attention to Lena’s mounds as she sucked and licked them both with equal precision and kissed down to Lena’s navel before she stopped and took a glance at Lena one last time as she started to kiss Lena’s thighs from the inside. It was so slow and Lena was about to combust and protest when suddenly she felt a wet swipe that happened from where she wanted it to be.

“Oh, Kara. Ghaaa—That’s so good.” She moaned and she fisted a handful of her mattress with one hand and the other in Kara’s hair pushing her harder to where she wants Kara to be, urging her to go on.

“You look so nice, baby. Go. Just let me take care of you.” Kara says as she uses her tongue to play with Lena’s center and sucks hard at her swollen mound. Lena started to rock her hips to Kara’s because if was starting to get too much and she was almost about to come again.

Fingers.

Now aside from Kara’s tongue, fingers were buried inside her in a pace that was used to make her come and it was so good that Lena arched her back in a way she was sure was not possible for a human being to have done. Kara’s tongue still licking and sucking her in and her fingers were pumping in and out in a very delicious way was making Lena shut her eyes and she was not seeing stars.

“Kara, I’m gonna—Please.”

“Go baby, let go for me.”

And she was sure that if the ceilings had ears, they would have been deaf with the way Lena let out a pleasurable scream from her high.

And she was going to make sure her apartment is sound proof from now on. Kara started to kiss her way up and she kissed Lena harder that made Lena moan further more. She was still sensitive but Kara started to rub her center to Lena’s and the CEO just brought her legs to Kara’s waist to urge her to continue grinding and Kara was moaning so hard that it made Lena want to come again with Kara. She heard a final groan and Kara was just panting hard and before Lena knew it, she was coming hard too.

They were both covered in sweat, and tired and exhausted but they were happy. It was a great night and a great day. And Lena just hugged Kara who was on top of her still panting but laughing at her with her eyes half closed.

“I want to take care of you too, darling.” She said.

“No, I’m good. I promise. We can do me next time. I just want to cuddle with you right now.” Kara said as she laid down beside Lena and started to hug her.

“Okay, darling.” She kissed Kara one last time. “Sleep well, okay?” By the time that Lena turned around, Kara’s eyes were fully shut and Lena was smitten. She kissed Kara one last time and greeted her goodnight. “Sweet dreams, darling.” She said as she got up to get herself some water.

She heard Kara murmur and it made stop on her tracks.

She wasn’t sure if she heard it right, but she was certain that it was it but she didn’t want to assume that it is what Kara said. It was something like.

.

.

I love you.

Lena turned around trying to shake the thoughts away. She was still not sure if she heard it right but she can ask Kara that tomorrow. However.

What she didn’t know was that she won’t be able to ask Kara that anymore. Because when Kara’s phone notifies that a message was received, she didn’t mean to peak, but she saw what the message from Alex was.

_HAPPY SECOND LIFE ANNIVERSARY KARA! I know you enjoyed your day with Lena, but I just want to say that I’m really happy to still spend time with you. I’ll always be thankful that you’re alive. I love you! Maggie says hi too!_

She almost drops the phone and turns to look at Kara who was now sleeping soundly in the bed.

She forgot about this day.

Andrea died today.

And she didn’t even have a clue or she totally forgot about it and also, she wasn’t aware that Kara spent the day with her because she was celebrating her surgery today.

So yes.

Right now, Lena is a mess because she doesn’t know what to feel. She feels bad to forget about Andrea. How can she ever do that to her? She deserved better! Not like this! She didn’t want to forget Andrea and guilt was suddenly creeping into her.

And now she feels like she’s back to square one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first time to write something this detailed so I hope I was able to deliver. Sorry if some of you would be disappointed but still, it was hard and yeah I had fun. Hahaha.   
> Anyways, Thanks for all your great comments from last time.   
> Tell me what you think!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She wasn’t sure what how she got home, but that night, she realized that this was much worst than her chest pains because there it makes her think that her heart had a problem as a whole, but right now, her heart was so broken to pieces she didn’t know where to start looking for where to pain came from.
> 
> She doesn’t sleep that night.

“Lena Luthor, I swear to god if you do not open this door, I will rip this apart and you won’t even like it!”

She got up from her couch and opened the door revealing a slightly angry Lex on her door step.

“What do you want?” She snaps at her brother who was clearly not willing to talk some of her shit for today.

“What do I want?” He scoffs. “Are you kidding me? Lena, you haven’t been answering my calls for the last 2 days and you’re not in CatCo or in L-Corp. I don’t know what happened, but I want is to know what’s gotten into you?” He says irritated.

“Nothing. I’m alright.” She answers lamely.

“I’m not stupid Lena. I’ve seen you like this before.” Lex demands an answer and she knows that she needed to say something or at least come clean. After all, Lex was a good brother and Lena knows that Lex will always understand her too. “I called Sam and to my surprise, she told me that you were out on a business trip and won’t be back until the end of the week. What’s happening?”

“I told Sam that I was out of the country on official L-Corp business.”

“You better thank me that I’m a good actor, Lena. I was able to convince Sam that I just forgot about it because I was busy. But you don’t get to lie about it when something is happening to you.” She can hear the worry in her brother’s words.

“I know, and I’m sorry.” She says as she settles back down at the couch.

“Did you and Kara have a fight? Does she even know that you’re here? You’re clearly moping about something.” Lex says calmly as he settles himself on the edge of the couch that Lena was laying at. The mention of Kara’s name makes Lena’s heart squeeze a bit tighter. Because the truth of the matter is, she gave the same excuse to Kara. That she was out of the country and would meet her back a day before the wedding that they need to attend.

She wasn’t hiding from Kara. But she can’t just bring herself to look at her at this moment because all she can feel was guilt. Guilt about what she is feeling because after that last night that they spent together, the night when Kara was celebrating her surgery, all she can remember is the fact that she had forgotten about Andrea, and it broke her heart.

All she can think about how she forgot about Andrea because she was too smitten by Kara. And how unfair it was for Kara that she feels this way. It wasn’t either women’s fault. It was her and her stupid confused mind and heart that makes it hard for her.

She feels so torn about the idea of Andrea leaving her memories. It still had been fresh. After that night, all the things that came back to her was the pain of not having her in her life anymore and she knew that she couldn’t look at Kara because Kara would know that something was bothering her. So she decided to lie.

“No. We didn’t have a fight. I just really wanted to spend the time alone. Sometime away, from them and… from her too.”

“Okay. I understand if you don’t want to tell me. But you don’t have to lie about you being here. If you want space from the people around you, they have the right to know. Specially Kara. She doesn’t deserve this. Whatever is happening, you have to tell her so she can help you and so you both would know what to do.” Lex reminds her.

“I know. It’s just… I don’t know, Lex.” She starts to cry and her brother shuffles over to her side and hugs her. And now she’s full on crying. “I know that I want to be with Kara, but I feel so guilty right now.”

“What are you guilty about?”

“I forgot about Andrea’s death anniversary.” She said truthfully. She had nothing to hide with Lex. He was the one who was with her ever since. “I feel like I’m starting to forget her, and I don’t want that to happen. But I know that it’s not fair for Kara because she just told me she loves me.” She knew what she heard that night was correct. Even if it was a sleepy confession, Lena was certain that Kara meant it.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Lex just comforts her. “It’s not your fault.” He said as he rubbed his hands over her arms. “I really don’t know what you are feeling right now and I don’t what to say. But I think it’s much more unfair for Kara if you keep hiding from her. You need to talk to her and tell her what’s happening and what’s been bothering you.”

She knows that her brother was right. She needed to come clean and talk to Kara about this. She still doesn’t know what to do but she had to.

“Okay. I’ll talk to her.”

“Promise?” Lex asks. She just nods and Lex kisses her forehead.

This was enough for now.

\---

“I’m almost there, darling.” She heard Lena chuckle on the other line. She hadn’t seen Lena in a while because Lena had some business to do outside the country. She really missed her and she was excited to see her after a few days of not being able to spend some lunch with her.

“Okay. I’ll be waiting outside the venue.” They were currently at a hotel where Gayle and Imra were supposed to be married. It was a garden wedding and it had a beautiful theme.

There were white flowers all around and the design was a bit rustic. The lights glowed perfectly in a wonderful sunset that would happen a few moments later. She was happy to be here. She suddenly remembers some of her personal ideas about what she wants when she gets married. Kara was a fan of seas and the mountains so she always wished to be married somewhere nice that had a cliff. Even a forest wedding would work for her as long as the nature is involved because she loved the feeling of the grass on her feet and the smell of earth that was fresh for her always.

And all throughout these moments that she thinks, all she can think about spending these ideas was Lena.

Lena.

How can she be so sure about it? They have only known each other for a while and had barely started dating. But a part of her heart knows that she was certain that she wanted to spend her life with the brunette by her side. She knows that she can do anything as long as Lena was there for her. It wasn’t fast for her, just the thought of marrying Lena gave her heart a slight rushed beat that was all too familiar for her.

But right now, it wasn’t her day.

It was Gayle’s and she wanted to congratulate her friend for her day.

She just waits for Lena patiently.

“Hi, darling. Traffic was bad and my driver was having a hard time looking for an alternative route so it took us a while.” She heard Lena from behind her. As usual, Lena looked so good in her dress. Kara remembers that day that they bought it. How can she? Well aside from what happened that night, she was sure that she said something dumb and something that might have creeped Lena out.

_I love you._

She was sure she meant it, but she wasn’t sure if she actually said it out loud because she was sent straight to deep slumber. Regardless, she knew how Lena would look on that dress but the real thing and the real moment right now was better that the last time. And as usual, Lena looked elegant.

“Lena.” She said hugging her girlfriend and she felt Lena squeeze her in and place a quick kiss on her lips.

“Hi.” Lena said with sparkling eyes. There was something in her eyes but all Kara can see was Lena and how her heart was reacting to her presence right now.

“Hi yourself.” She whispers. “Shall we? We need to be seated. I think it’ll start in a few.”

“Lead the way.” And Lena loops her arm around Kara.

“How was your trip? Did anything go well for L-Corp?” She asked. She felt Lena stiffen a bit but didn’t pointed it out.

“It was well. All is good and after the trip, it’s up to Lex to do all the job. I did my part already.”

“That’s great to hear. I know that you can do anything perfectly.” She praises Lena and she sees a faint blush slowly make to Lena’s face. They were now seated on the 4th row and as soon as they sat down, an announcement was made that the wedding was about to begin. Alex and Maggie were at the other side and gave them a little wave and a thumbs up.

When Gayle came into view, she can’t help but stare because she was so beautiful in her white flowy dress. She looked so elegant and so beautiful that it made Kara so happy to see this kind of thing. Gayle saw her and gave her a small wave and she can see that Gayle was happy to see her here. She gave Lena a quick glance just to make sure that she was alright because after all, this was a _wedding_ and she wasn’t sure Lena’s position whether it’s still a sore spot. But she was here, so it was a good sign that she was all good with all of this.

Next was the whole entourage and then Imra came into a view. Everybody had stood up to acknowledge the presence of the other bride. She was wearing the same dress but a without the sleeves and it looked perfectly fine on her. Thoughts about seeing Lena in a dress like that one day made Kara’s heart flutter a bit more and she can’t help but hold Lena’s hand and kiss it. This earned an affectionate look from Lena, but the smile was something that didn’t reached her ears.

“Are you alright?” She asked Lena just to check in.

“Yes. I’m fine.” Lena kissed her cheek and they proceeded with the wedding ceremony.

It was a solemn ceremony. Everything started to change when the officiant had declared the highlight of the day.

“I now pronounce you, married. You may now kiss.” And she can see that Gayle was in tears as she takes Imra’s face in her hands and kisses her softly. There were loud cheers around and everybody clapped at the newlyweds. Even Lena was clapping and cheering for them. They went ahead and proceeded with the reception where they met Maggie and Alex on the table that was assigned to them.

“Lena! I’m glad to see you here.” Alex said as she hugged Lena and the small brunette gave her a small hug back.

“Yeah. I’ve been busy for a while.” Lena answered.

“I bet. Kara was moping and talking about how much she misses you. We even needed to kick her out one time to just to get her to go home and mope at her own house.” Maggie chimed in. It had been a while since Lena met Maggie and Kara was surprised that Lena actually liked Maggie a lot. The small woman’s attitude and frankness had caught Lena off guard at first but as time went on, they actually got along. When they had the chance, all four for of them actually ate dinner together and it made Kara so happy that Lena was getting along with her family.

“I bet she is.” Lena kissed her cheek fondly and caressed her face lovingly. It sent Kara into a spin because again, her heart was beating because of the happiness she is feeling at this moment.

“Enough of me, there goes the newlyweds!” Kara says as her peers’ glance over to Gayle and Imra who were walking towards their table.

“Gayle! Imra! Congratulations! I’m so happy for the both of you.” Kara says as she hugs them both.

“Thanks for being here, Kara.” Gayle hugs her back. “I see you brought a guest? Hi, I’m Gayle.” Lena reaches to Gayle’s hand and shakes it sweetly.

“Hi, I’m Lena. I’m Kara’s girlfriend. And congrats on the wedding. It was so lovely.”

“Thank you. I’m happy you can make it, all of you. It means a lot to us.” Imra says as she touches Gayle’s arm. “Please enjoy. The food would be served in a while. We need to check on the other guests, but we’ll be seeing you later. Okay?” Gayle adds on as they gave the group a small wave and left.

“Is it just me, or do they both look good together?” Maggie asked them.

“They are absolutely lovely.” Kara answered. “But I don’t mind. I’ve got the prettiest girl in the room.” Kara says as she glances over to Lena. She can feel Lena stiffen a little more and it had caught her attention again. She didn’t want to point it out right now, but she wants to know what was bothering the brunette.

“Shut up, Kara. We all know you’re whipped. Just keep it to yourself.” Maggie said with a sly grin.

“Anyway, let’s eat. I’m starving.” Lena was the one to break the discussion as the servers placed their food in front of them. Kara would talk to Lena after. But now, she needs food.

\---

“We’ll head out. Lena’s tired and might still be jetlagged.” Kara said as she stood up and gave Alex and Maggie a quick hug. “Thanks for tonight.”

“Here, take the car. We’re going to a bar after and I don’t think if I’ll be driving.” Alex said as she tossed Kara the keys.

“Thanks, Alex.” She smiled and took Lena’s hand to offer help in standing up.

“Good night, Alex, Maggie.” Lena gave them both a quick hug before placing her hand over Kara’s.

“Keep safe, love birds! Use protection!” Maggie shouted and they just both laughed at Maggie’s bluntness.

“She really doesn’t have a filter.” And Kara just shakes her head in agreement. The walk towards the parking lot was silent and it was not a good kind. It gave Kara an unsettling feeling but she didn’t want to push Lena. She just kept her mouth shut.

The ride was worst and they were both not talking at this point but Kara just held Lena’s hand from time to time to offer her support. She knew that Lena will talk when she’s ready. She just needed to be patient about it. They arrived at Lena’s and Kara walked her to her apartment. The silence was killing her and she didn’t want the night to end like this.

“Are you alright, Lena?” She asked as Lena shut the door behind her.

“I’m fine. Sorry. I’m just really tired. Jet lag.” A lie.

That was a lie. Kara knew that.

“You can tell me if somethings bothering you. I’m here for you.” She said softly, however, the answer she got was something that she never expected she would be receiving ever.

“I told I’m fine, Kara! Can you just drop it?” Lena snapped.

Lena actually snapped at her. And this has never happened before. Sure, there were arguments and misunderstandings, but it never came to a point where Lena actually raised her voice at her. She was stunned and she really didn’t know how to react with that kind of answer. She was confused, she wanted to be mad, but mostly., she was just hurt.

“Oh. Uhm, okay.” Kara shifter from her position and remained silent for a while, Lena was not looking at her and Kara was just looking at the floor. “I’ll just let you rest. I know you’re tired.” She said as she gave Lena a faint smile. She wasn’t sure if she was even allowed to touch Lena because the younger woman was clearly not happy but she wasn’t going to push her luck. “Just call me if you need anything, okay?” She said as she headed towards the door.

“Kara, wait.” Lena said. There was a quick shift in Lena’s mood and specially in the atmosphere right now. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lash out like that. I’m just really tired from the trip and I was out of line.” She heard Lena walk towards her in small steps.

That was a lie.

“Please stay.” Lena said in a small voice. Kara knew that they needed to talk about this. She mustered up all the courage that she needed because she didn’t want the night to end in a bad state.

“I know you weren’t overseas.” She said and she heard Lena gasped from behind her. She closed her eyes and tried to gain her composure. Of course, she knew. She wasn’t stupid.

“Wha—what are you talking about?”

“I know that you didn’t have a business trip Lena. I knew that the entire time that you were not seeing me and all of us, that you were right here. In your apartment.” She said and this time she faced Lena, with her hands in her pockets.

“Kara—I can—Let me explain.” Lena said talking a small step towards her.

“No. You don’t really have too. I guess you’re thinking how the hell I found out?” She didn’t receive a response so she took it as her cue to continue. To her credit, Lena just looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

“I came here a day after you told me that you we’re going out of the country. I needed to return something to you and I just thought that I’d leave it to the people at the front desk so they can give it to you.” She shifted her weight from one leg to another, a thing that she normally does to ground herself, whether she was speaking or playing soccer. She did it to calm her nerves. “I asked them to give it you, but they actually told me that you were in your place.”

Lena was speechless and her hands were not covering her face.

“I just told them that I’ll come back at a different time to give it to you personally.” She breathed in. _Deep breaths, Kara._ She told herself. “I don’t know why you did it, or maybe I have an idea but I’m not sure. But I just want you to know that I don’t like the fact that you lied to me.”

“Kara—”

“Let me finish. Please.” She interrupted Lena. “I always tell you that you can always talk to me, tell me if something’s bothering you. I don’t want to be mad because I know that you had your reason but you didn’t need to lie. If you wanted some space, I’ll give you space. Why would I not?” She said and this time her hands were shaking. Good thing they were hidden in her pockets. She took a deep breath and Lena took this as a sign to speak.

Good. Here comes the hard part. The part where her theories of Lena’s absence would be explained.

“I didn’t want to lie.” That’s how she started. Kara knew that. But she needed to hear more. “It’s just, I’ve been having a hard time lately and I don’t know how to deal with it and the easy route for me was just to keep people away from me until I figure it out.”

“Did you?” She asked Lena. “Were you able to figure it out?”

Lena just shook her head and brought her hands to her face once more to stop herself from crying. But it was too late. Lena was crying now and Kara wanted to comfort her, but right now, she didn’t. So Lena continued to talk.

“I haven’t. And I don’t think I’ll figure it out anytime soon.” She said in all honesty.

“Is this about Andrea?” There. She said it. Lena’s head suddenly snapped up and Lena gave Kara an anxious look. And that confirmed it all.

“How did you…”

“How did I know?” Kara wanted to ask it in a sarcastic way, but it came out like a wet sound. She was trying so her for her tears to not fall. “I’m not stupid, Lena. I always knew that at some point, this might happen. I hoped that it wouldn’t but I guess there are somethings really beyond our control.”

There was dead silence and Lena was the one who broke it.

“That night, after we went and brought our things for the wedding, you said something.” Lena said pacing slowly. Her hands covering her mouth in an attempt to not let her sob get in the way of her speech. I know I heard it right, but I think you said that you loved me.” She was looking at Kara’s eyes. She didn’t say anything. She just let Lena continue her explanation.

“I wanted to ask you if you meant in when we wake up but, unfortunately, I wasn’t able to ask that anymore because right before I slept, I saw Alex greet you a second life anniversary. That’s when it hit me.” There was a pregnant pause. “I forgot about Andrea.”

Of course. She knew it.

“And I know it sounds unfair but after that I just feel like I’ve betrayed her when clearly, I didn’t but the thought of not remembering her is breaking my heart, but I don’t want to lose you. So I needed a time away to think about it but I still don’t know up until now. I don’t want to hurt you, Kara. I’m sorry.” She was crying fully this time and it was breaking Kara’s heart.

The fact that Lena was crying was one reason, but mainly the reason why her heart was breaking was because she knew that this might have happened. It was agonizing to think about it but to actually have her thoughts come to life felt like dying. But she loved Lena and she didn’t want Lena to think that she owed her anything. She doesn’t know how Lena feels but she was glad to hear that the other woman didn’t want her out of her life.

She walked towards Lena and hugged her tight and Lena just crashed into Kara’s arms and cried so hard that Kara was certain her suit would be a mess. But she couldn’t care less. Lena needed her right now because she was so lost. And even if it hurts, Kara would be there.

“I know, baby. It’s okay.”

“But I don’t want to hurt you. And now I did, because I’m so lost and I don’t know because I feel all this guilt for her and for you and I just miss her so much. I’m so sorry.” Lena said as her tears continued to stain her beautiful face.

“I actually wanted to spend that day with you to make you feel good because I thought that you needed me because it’s Andrea’s death anniversary. Turns out you didn’t have any idea.” She chuckled sadly.

“Oh, Kara. How could I do this to you.”

“No. Enough of this.” Kara said as she separated herself from Lena. “You don’t have to feel bad because I know what I have gotten my self into. You’re not unfair. But I just wished that you just became completely honest with me about how you feel.” She said sadly.

“I want to be the person whose always there for you, and right now, I’m not that person.” Sighed and she got her hands back into her pockets. “I know you’re lost right now and you don’t know what to do. And the last thing that I want to do is to confuse you more and hurt you. You never have to feel guilty about how you feel. I understand how you feel because I’ve been there too. It’s scary for forget the people that you love so much and that’s something that I never want you to feel. So, if you need time…”

“Then that’s what I’ll give you.”

“Kara. No. I want to be with you. Please believe me.” Lena said like she was pleading.

“I know, honey. I believe you.” Kara said kissing Lena’s cheeks. “But this isn’t about me believing you or not. This is about you knowing and finding what you need. I’ll always be here; I’m not going anywhere.”

“Kara—”

She looked at Lena and held something from the inside of her pockets. “I did mean it you know.” She smiled sadly. “I really do love you. But I guess it doesn’t really matter now.”

“What do you mean?” Lena asks her.

“Have I ever told you that from the very first time I laid my eyes on you, I felt a weird feeling at how my heart was beating. I guess this heart recognized you.” She said pointing and looking at her chest. “It was clear from the start that this heart chose you. But you know what’s funny.” She paused and took a deep breath. “I think that even if it happens that I still had my own heart, I’m certain that it will choose you too. Regardless of which heart, I know that I will still love you. So, I think you removing this didn’t really helped my case.”

She placed Lena’s engagement ring in the kitchen counter. “You left this the first time that we slept together. I found it one day and this was what I wanted to return last time I was here. It didn’t matter if you had the ring or not, Lena.” A tear escaped her eyes. She was tired of holding them back.

“Because, although this heart has chosen you…” She sighed heavily and clutched _her_ heart. “… I don’t think that your heart has chosen me. The wholeness of me.”

“It’s not—Kara no…”

“I promise, I’m not mad or something. I am sad. But I want you to be very sure of what you want. If it’s me, then tell me. If it’s not, tell that to me too. I need to know, but I promise that I will never hate you for it.” She was looking at Lena with so much hurt but she was still smiling.

“So this is me, giving you what you need. Take all the time you need, Lena.” She said as she took a step forward the brunette who was crying so hard right now. She didn’t want the night to end like this. Truth was, she was hoping that Lena would fight and make her believe that she loved her too. That even though she was confused, she needed to hear it and let Lena convince her that no, Andrea doesn’t matter because she chooses to love Kara too.

But it doesn’t go that way.

And she can’t be mad at her. But she’s so mad at herself for no apparent reason. She was willing to fight, but right now, all the fight has left her body. She just wanted to rest. She placed a longing kiss to Lena’s forehead before she says the words that would break her heart even more.

“Regardless of your decision…” She smiled and looked the younger woman in the eye. “…you know where to find me. I’ll see you around.”

She wasn’t sure what how she got home, but that night, she realized that this was much worst than her chest pains because there it makes her think that her heart had a problem as a whole, but right now, her heart was so broken to pieces she didn’t know where to start looking for where to pain came from.

She doesn’t sleep that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me guys. This is vital to the story and I hope you understand. I was literally partly in tears while writing this down, but I promise that we're going to fix this.   
> Tell me what you think.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She doesn’t drink. No. She wasn’t allowed to and she knows that she’ll do something stupid if she goes that route. So, she doesn’t do it.
> 
> She doesn’t drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a hectic month and I am so sorry for not updating as much as I really would want too. But I hope y'all like this chapter.   
> Thanks for the kind comments last time. I don't like SuperCorp fighting. We'll fix it. I promise.

She doesn’t drink. No. She wasn’t allowed to and she knows that she’ll do something stupid if she goes that route. So, she doesn’t do it.

She doesn’t drink.

But she wanted to. She wanted to drink so bad, but she doesn’t want to do something that she’ll regret in the morning and besides, hang overs are the worst. She just buries herself in work. Its been a week. A week since she last saw Lena and made the decision to put the distance between the two of them. She doesn’t tell anyone right away. She doesn’t want to because she wanted to handle things on her own for now. Even Alex’s words won’t do her any good because she was hurting. But she needed to be away.

A week ago, she went straight to Sam’s office in the morning after her heart-breaking conversation with Lena. She didn’t sleep that night. It was hard too. It was making her dizzy and it was literally making her heart ache. She decided to not sleep and still went to work in the morning.

“Kara. What happened to you?” Sam said as she stood up and approached Kara who was currently closing her glass window _. Did she really look like shit_?

“Good morning to you too, boss.” She chuckled but Sam gave her a stern look saying that she needs an explanation why she looks like shit and what’s got her into her office this early.

“What brings you here? Did I miss a meeting with you?”

“No, you didn’t.” She chuckles again. She’s doing that a lot this morning. She thought she won’t have it in her to smile because of last night’s drama but Sam was looking at her with a pained expression of worry. “I just needed to tell you that I’d like to volunteer if you have assignments that need travelling. Like, if you need someone to go over to Star City, Gotham, Central City, Korea, China or anywhere, I’d like to be that person.”

Sam eyes her warily. She knew why she was being looked like that. That was because it was a very odd request coming from her. It wasn’t like she wasn’t assigned to travel before for her articles or interviews, but she never volunteered for one because she knew that she was not good with travelling alone. She couldn’t even use a darn map for her own good but she needed this. So she power’s through.

“What brought this up?” Sam’s tone was different. It wasn’t a tone that sounds more of a boss kind of feel but more of _what’s happening to you, I’m your friend talk to me._

“I wanted to try something. Something new that we can actually add to our magazine feature if you may.” She lies. Well not really. She actually pitched the idea last time but it wasn’t revisited again because of their busy schedules and mostly because she was _busy_ with Lena.

Well, that wasn’t an option now so she thinks that this will be the best time to go over with her idea.

“Is this about your food column?”

“Featured food around the city column actually. I think this way, we can not only cater to National City but to other places too. It can open a lot of opportunities for us if we do this. I can give you my proposal for it and see it yourself and you can tell me what you think about it. Fair enough?”

Sam looked like she was thinking for a while about this information. Looks like she was considering it and it made Kara smile. She knew that Sam trusts her given her status as a cub reporter but she has potential… and she just _really_ needs to go away for a while. 

“Sure. Show me your samples and your proposal about this. I think this will actually work.”

“Thanks, Sam! I’ll make sure to make it look perfect for you.” She grinned and gave Sam a sweet smile.

“Of course, not to sound biased but you are my favorite reporter here even before you met Lena, you’ve always known that.” At the mention of Lena’s name, she somehow froze on the spot but was lucky enough to go unnoticed by Sam who was now walking into her chair.

“That really means a lot to me.” It really does. In a world where she had been limited, Sam was one of the people who believed in her _. Hell, she even hired her!_

“But right now. I have a favor to ask, Kara.” Sam said in a serious tone, looking at Kara with a glare in her eye. Why was she looking at her like that? Did she know what happened already? Was she mad at her because of what happened last night? Sam was professional but she was also Lena’s best friend. She was literally hiding her sweaty palms. _This is too early and I don’t even have coffee in my system yet._ She waited for Sam to continue who was still looking at her like she was about to chop her head off.

“Get out of my building and get some sleep. I don’t know what happened to you, but you look like you need it.” Sam softens and Kara let out a breath that she didn’t know that she was even holding. “I don’t want to see your face in here at least until tomorrow at 8AM. Okay? Now, off you go.” Sam shooed her and it made Kara smile. Despite the circumstances last night, she was pretty happy to know that she made great friendships along the way. She gave Sam a small salute of thanks and headed out.

“Champ! There you are!” Winn said running from behind her even before she can go outside of the building.

“Hey.” She smiled at her friend. She still doesn’t get it why Winn calls her champ, but she gets the idea that this was because she was a champion of life having able to beat death. Twice. _Winn’s words. Not hers._ She doesn’t feel like a champion though. Right now, she knew that she was on the losing end.

She lost Lena.

But that thought has got to wait.

“Breakfast game?” He smiles excitedly at her as he shows a new set of deck of cards at her. She laughs and drags Winn out of the building to eat something.

And yes, to play a game.

She was really happy that she has great friends. At least for now she’s happy. She can be broken again later.

\---

_I’m sorry._

She reads. She wasn’t sure how she missed the message but it has been sent about two weeks ago. This was the last message that Lena sent her.

Two weeks.

It’s been two weeks after that day.

Night.

Whatever.

She has no news or no idea what Lena’s been doing right now. Ever since that night, she really decided to take time for herself and give Lena all the space that she needs. It was easier said than done because she misses her. She misses her so bad. There are times when she just wants to walk into Lena’s office and say sorry for being so petty and for being so childish and for bringing those things ups. To tell that it wasn’t a big deal, that she can handle it if it meant that they can still be together. She can swallow her pride and insecurity of competing to a dead person. She can do that and she wants to do it so bad that she just breaks down once in a while.

She never experienced heartache like this before. This was worst than a heart failure.

Because it wasn’t only her heart that was hurting. Every inch of her body was hurting and she doesn’t know what to do or how to make it stop. Her soul was torn and her mind is tired of thinking. All of her ached for Lena.

But she needed to be strong.

She deletes the message.

\---

She gives up on her strong facade the following day.

“Kara! Wake up!” Alex was jumping in her bed causing her to bounce along with her. “Come on! Wake up! We’re going somewhere!”

“Go away, Alex.” She groans and tries to push Alex away from her. It was a Saturday and all she wanted to do was sleep. She had been travelling a lot to different places ever since Sam gave her the go signal to start on her new article about food in the city. It was going great but she was getting exhausted.

“No. Get up before I use my strength and literally carry you over just so you’ll wake up.” When Alex sets her mind on something, there was not stopping her for sure. So, she gets up and pushes Alex one last time before getting out of bed.

“Come on. Let’s eat breakfast and do something fun today.” Alex grins and Kara just rolls her eyes.

Turns out, Alex’s idea of fun was literally fun because she brought Kara to an arcade house that was newly opened and had the luxury to have an early pass. After their breakfast that lasted for 2 hours, thanks to the wonderful menu that they had, Alex dragged her to this awesome place.

“How did you have a free pass to this place?” She asks as her eyes were wandering and her hands were touching the fun game machines that were around. They all looked new and brought a sense of nostalgia for her.

“The owner of this place is the father of one of my patients. He seemed very thankful for me and asked if there was something that they can do to thank me. I wanted to decline but when the mentioned arcades—well, who was I to decline, right?”

“But why did you bring me here and not Maggie?” Not that she was complaining

“I don’t know. I feel like I’ve been missing out a lot on you these past few weeks.” Alex shrugged as they sat at one of the stools that had Tekken 3 on it. It was one their favorite games growing up. “I haven’t been seeing you a lot lately because you’re busy or I’m busy. So, I figured to kidnap you today. I missed you.” Alex smiles at her. This was one of the things that she loves about Alex. Ever since she got adopted, Alex had taken her under her wing saying that she had always wanted a sister but never had the chance to because of Eliza and Jeremiah’s work schedule. And that’s when Alex introduced her to the world of Arcade.

“And besides, this is our thing. I love Maggie, but she’s a sore loser at arcade.” Alex adds. Yes, this was their thing. And she just smiles. It was like they were teenagers again. She loved it.

It was almost afternoon and they didn’t notice that the time had passed. With everything that has happened lately, it was hard for Kara to think about being happy. This was the happiest that she has been for over three weeks already and she was thankful because Alex always knew how to make her happy. But the day needed to end, and they got back to her apartment, Alex dropping her off.

“Home sweet home.” Alex said as she went straight to the fridge and grabbed a beer handing one to Kara.

“You know I don’t really drink much, Alex.” She says to her sister who was still shoving the drink into her hands. “I kept those for you.”

“I know, but it won’t kill you. Trust me, I’m a doctor.” She sighs as she takes the drink and slumps herself into the couch. “And I know you need a drink and you wanted to drink for quiet a while now.”

She looks at her sister warily. _What is she talking about?_

“Don’t give me that look, Kar. Believe me, I don’t know what’s happening to you, but one thing is sure.” She sips a drink and takes her gaze away from Kara. “You’re not fine and you’re just bottling it up inside you.”

Kara was silent for a while and had the urge to just take a sip at the drink. She didn’t care about how awful it tasted in her mouth. Alex was right, she needed it.

“Is it Lena?” Again. At the mention of her name, Kara freezes and that was all that her sister needs for an answer. Alex doesn’t look at her but continues to ask. “What happened?” She just stayed silent. No really having an idea about how to tell her sister what happened between them.

“I don’t know…” She says with a sad smile. “I decided to give her some space. So she can clear her head.”

“Clear her head in what way?”

She wasn’t sure how to tell Alex. Thinking about it makes her want to just crawl into bed and cry. But Kara tells her what happened and how it all started. All throughout, reliving the night and the emotions and the words that were exchanged, Kara just let it all out and no details were spared. She was crying, and at one point, she didn’t realize that she was shaking only until Alex was hugging her just so she has a solid thing to hold on to.

“I didn’t want to do it at first, Alex. It hurts so much. To think that I’m here just waiting for her and she just can’t let go of her. I knew that at first, I can never really take that space in her heart, but I never wanted that to happen. All I ever wanted was to be there for her and be the one she needs, but she can’t. She doesn’t need me.”

“I’m sorry, honey.” Alex just hugged her and it was all that she ever needed. 

“I feel so selfish for wanting to be the person that she needs and making the decision to have space for the both of us. I feel like I want to take it all back because clearly, she didn’t want to feel that way too. I know she doesn’t because I can feel that way that she cares about me. It’s true and there is something there and I feel like an idiot for letting my hurt get on the way and told her those things.”

“I don’t want to make you feel worse than you’re feeling right now, but maybe a part of her wanted to be with you just because a part of you is Andrea.” Alex sighs and Kara can already see the regret in her sister’s eyes upon saying the words out loud. “But I’m not saying that was the only factor.” Alex shuffles and looks Kara in the eye. “You’re an amazing person. You love everyone around you and you have a big heart that can fit all of us into it. And I believe that even Lena knows that. That’s why she wanted to be with you too. But the pissed part of me, being your sister thinks that maybe yeah. Andrea was still a factor between the two of you. I’m sorry for being an ass.”

“It’s okay. At least one of us has the actual guts to say it out loud.” She says wiping the tears from her face. “There are times that she just looks at me like I hang the stars in the sky, and I think the scared part of me doesn’t want to admit but thinks that she just looks at me like that because she sees Andrea in me. After all, we have the same blue eyes.”

“I bet yours are better.” Alex says in a teasing way trying to lighten up the mood, but Kara was not ready for the mood to be lighter.

“Yeah, but my blue eyes being better than hers didn’t actually help, didn’t it?” She says in a pained voice and takes another swig at her beer bottle. “All I’ll ever be is Andrea’s ghost. Or proof of her living heart. It’s sad because I’m the one who lived, but it feels like I’m the one who lost my heart to a person who really isn’t here anymore. That’s why I feel like I’m selfish because, I wanted Lena to myself.”

Alex just rubs her back and Kara appreciates it more than anything in the world. “You know, I thought that me and Maggie won’t make it.” There was a pause and Kara just looked Alex in the eye and it made Alex continue what she was thinking about.

“There were moments that I think about all the pain that our differences have caused us. The idea about having a future together, a family, actual kids and growing old, at first, it really felt like it was out of my reach just because she didn’t want the same things as me.” Alex took a sip at her second bottle of beer.

“You’ve seen me then, Kara. What I have been like when Maggie was not around and it was not a good place for me. I was so lost, because all I wanted was her, and I was willing to give it all up for her. Just to be with her. But I realized that if I push through with it, I would grow to resent her for it. That I gave up a part of me that will make me happy just so we can work out.” She touched Kara’s arm gently offering comfort to her sister. A gesture that makes Kara smile.

“Don’t ever think that you’re selfish for wanting things, Kara. You’re allowed to want things too. And if the time and space will help you, grab it. Because the strongest things take time to be built. Like me and Maggie. Look at us now, we’re much better and we learned to love each other more and love things about each other that made us realize what we both really wanted.”

Kara smiled at Alex and gave her a long hug. “I’m really happy that things worked out between you and Maggie.

“I’m happy too.” She kisses Kara’s temple. “And I know that you and Lena will work out too.”

“I hope so.”

Yeah. She really hopes so.

Alex slept after a few more beers. She was happy she wasn’t alone.

\---

“Hi mom.” Kara says in a whisper kind of way, afraid that it will wake Alex up. For some reason she can’t decipher, Alex has a really good sense of hearing.

“Kara, sweetheart.” Eliza beamed on the other end of the line. “How are you doing right now?”

“I’m fine. I just wanted to hear your voice.” Kara said. She was in the verge of crying again. She was drunk and in pain, and those two don’t go well together. It just makes her more vulnerable hearing Eliza’s voice makes it calmer.

“Are you alright, my dear?” She doesn’t know how Eliza does it. Just the sound of her voice

takes all the hurt away even just for a while. She knows that at the end of the day, even if everything will go, Eliza will always love and care for her. But truth is, she doesn’t know why she even called her. She didn’t want to bring Eliza into her own drama but a part of her just wanted to hear her mother’s voice. Study does say that talking to your mom somehow makes your stress level lesser. Maybe it works with sadness too.

“I’m alright. I just, I really miss you.” She sniffs and pauses. Maybe she does know why she called Eliza. After her talk with Alex earlier, it became more of a reality for Kara that maybe, Lena only liked her because she saw Andrea in her. This moment, that she was alone to herself and no one was giving her assurance in the stillness of her room, she calls her mother. She doesn’t know how to ask the question. But this was Eliza. And maybe she can tell her that yeah, maybe that was the reason why Lena can’t let go of Andrea.

“I just want to know if… did you see somethings change in me ever since I received my new heart? Some new traits that were not there before?”

“Why do you ask that?” She heard shuffling on the other end of the line. It was late and Eliza probably got up from bed to talk to her.

“I’m sorry. I forgot that it was late already. Alex and I had a few drinks and I didn’t know but I just know I needed to hear your voice.” She said crying fully this time. She wasn’t sobbing but her tears just can’t stop flowing.

“Kara. You listen to me.” Eliza said like she was on the verge of crying too. “I don’t know why you have asked this, but believe me when I say this.” There was a pause coming from Eliza like she was gathering all the energy she needed to answer Kara’s question.

“I may not be your real mother, you may have not came from me, and I may have never seen you in the early years of your life, but in my heart, I know that you are mine. You are brilliant, amazing, witty, caring, loving, patient, helpful and many other things that makes you, you. Regardless of your heart, this has always been you and you’re just getting better always, honey. Never ever think that things are changing in you just because a part of you wasn’t yours to begin with. Every part of you is truly you, Kara. Never ever forget who you are. This is how I’ve known you. And I will always remember you this way.”

“Thank you, mom.” She whispers and this actually makes perfect sense right now. She knows that with these words, she can get better in time. That’s what she needs. Time. And all the people around her.

“I don’t know what happened that you came up with this question, but I can really feel that you’re hurting right now. I’m here for you too, okay? For now, whatever is happening, process it and feel it. You’re allowed to be weak sometimes too. Let the other people be strong for you especially during this time. We love you, honey. I love you.”

“I love you too.” And she hung up.

That was enough assurance.

Even just for the night.

She can hurt again tomorrow.

\---

“Kara. Can I talk to you?” Sam said closing the door of her office.

“Sam. Sure. What can I do for you?” She fixed her things and all her papers. Her office was a mess.

“What’s happening between you and Lena?”

Kara shot her head back up, her mouth hanging open. “What do you mean?” She said naturally.

“Don’t act innocent on me, Kara. At first, I really didn’t want to think that route, but when I thought about it for a while. I know that something is wrong.”

“I don’t really know what you’re talking about.” She feigns innocence.

“You asking to be assigned somewhere else? Overworking yourself? You haven’t asked me about Lena for quite a while and lastly, you two don’t even appear at the same place together. I don’t want to overstep here, but Lena is my best friend and you are one of the closest that I have so I just want to know what’s happening between the two of you.” Sam says as she sat down on one of Kara’s chairs.

“What gave your way? I mean, how did you come to a conclusion that something’s wrong with us?” She asked. She wanted to deflect as much as she can just to avoid the subject. She wished that she left early already. Sam just sighed and gave Kara an answer that she wasn’t ready for.

“She hasn’t been answering my calls for over a week now. She bails on our lunch and now I heard that she’s staying at the house that she was supposed to live with Andrea.”

Oh.

Yep, she wasn’t ready for the last part.

“I think that answers your question, Sam.” She says as she gets up fixing her things and the other woman just looks at her with confusion in her eyes. “She’s not really ready to be with me yet.” She gives Sam a pained smile. Because yeah. Lena being in Andrea’s house, _their house_ was not a good sign for her. “And I don’t think that she ever will be. Well, at least that’s what I think.”

“What are you talking about? I can see the way Lena talks about you or how she cares about you.”

“It’s not about what she feels about me. It’s about what she wants. I gave her space and I just wish that maybe someday, even if we don’t end up together…” The thought about not being with Lena makes her want to cry a little bit more. But she doesn’t want to cry anymore. She’s given it time, and she needs to move forward. “…she’ll be able to find someone who she can truly be happy with. That’s all I really wish for her.”

“Kara.” Sam looked at her like she was ready to cry and give her a hug but she stepped away to distance herself.

“I’m okay, Sam. Go to Lena. She needs you.” She smiles and leaves the office. The last information was the final nail to her coffin.

\---

Despite the hurt that has happened, she can never bring herself to hate Lena or be mad at her. But she needed a distraction. After her talk with Sam, she felt like her body was on autopilot. She remained busy for the next coming days juggling her time with traveling, writing her articles, exercising and of course, with coaching the soccer team. She was physically exhausted and she was pretty sure that if Alex can see her, she was going to be so mad at her and might actually kill her too. But she needed all the distraction that she can get and it does help her to forget.

It was a Saturday and she decided to give herself a break by running to the soccer field and play with her ball for a while. Ruby’s team wasn’t due for about another 2 hours so she literally had the place all to herself. Warming up, she started to do a quick run along the oval so she can start with the adrenaline and of course, to get her heart pumping. She knew that she was allowed to work out as long as she can control herself. She was well aware of that but at this moment, all she wanted to do was to run and forget everything. So she ran and ran until she can feel that her lungs were burning and her heart was pumping the blood that she needed.

She slumped forward and was breathing heavily because of the run but she didn’t bring herself to care. She grabs a ball and started to run with the ball and practiced with her goals, just like when she was still playing actively. The last time she did this was when Jeremiah died. He was one of the people that introduced her to the sport and she loved every bit of it. Playing has always brought her a sense of pride that this is one thing that she is good at and that no one can take that away from her. But sadly, it was taken away because of her stupid heart ailment.

At this moment, all Kara can think about was kicking the ball like she was kicking all of her frustrations, problems, heart aches and all the shitty thing that was happening in her life. So, she kicks. And she scores, and she kicks some more and she scores again. Like she was proving that she can win and score in life if she can just kick away all the sad things that happened to her. Everything that she has bottled up growing up. She kicks angrily, all her anger focused on the ball because she wants to forget. And win.

If she can just fucking win. Just one time. Because she never wins. Not in life.

The death of her parents.

Jeremiah’s death.

Her soccer career.

Her, almost dying.

She didn’t notice that the kids were starting to pile up and that she had an audience already. She was so angry and she was sweating so hard. There was nothing that she can see. All she can see was pain and loss. She thought that she can be used to it. That she was used to losing people, because that’s what happens to her. But no. She was wrong. Because the one time that she wanted to win, she didn’t.

And now, she lost her too.

She lost Lena.

So she kicks some more.

But suddenly she stops moving and all she can hear was her name being called by kids, and her heart _literally aching._

.

.

.

She scores the goal. One last time. Then it all went blank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't kill me, but for some reason, I like to see a sick Kara too. I mean not too sick, but a part where she is not really her strong superhero self. So yeah. Tell me what you think about this one.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Dear god, please… not again.” She said with tears rolling down her cheeks, totally ignoring the fact that she was just in her pajamas when she ran out. All her thoughts focused on the blonde that she hasn’t seen in a while.

It was an early Saturday morning when she heard her phone ring. Lena was always known to be a morning person, but the truth is she enjoyed lazy mornings. She always enjoyed staying in bed for a while and just take time to herself. Or sometimes even cuddle with a blonde reporter.

Kara.

No. Cuddles wasn’t an option now. She knew that. Because she was the one who fucked up.

Sweet, loving, caring, and beautifully patient Kara whom she hurt just because she couldn’t help but be haunted by her feelings for her dead fiancé. It had been a few weeks since she last saw her. It had been hard because for the past months that she had been with Kara, she felt more alive than ever. Andrea was dead, so what was stopping her?

She knew that whatever happens, Andrea would have a special place in her heart. But right now, she just knows that she had spent enough time to mourn over Andrea. Loving Kara doesn’t mean that she doesn’t love Andrea. It just means that she is ready to love again after the heartache that losing Andrea had caused. She knew that loving Kara was different. It brought a sense of life in her. A new understanding that there is life in love.

She took some time off to herself just like what Kara asked her to do. To find out what she really wants, and she knew in her heart that she wanted Kara. That’s why she was in this place. Stayed in this place for quiet a while to fix her own mistakes and finally move on. It was hard, but it needed to be done.

Because finally. Finally, she was ready.

She knew that she was.

And her phone rings again.

She groans and looks at the screen seeing that Sam was calling her for about 4 times already. Was she really that tired that she missed that call? Yes. Apparently, thinking a lot will make you tired physically and mentally. All the emotional things that happened the past weeks was taking its toll on her so she ignored Sam’s call one last time. Sam will message her if it’s something important. It was Saturday and she was certain that Sam will just invite her over for Ruby’s game.

She wanted to, but unfortunately; she was not around them. She was currently hauled up in the house that she and Andrea bought because she had business to do with it, and the place is an hour away from where Sam and Ruby were at.

Another factor is that, as much as she misses Kara, she wasn’t sure if she was ready to see her. She wanted too, but she was being careful because she wasn’t sure if Kara wanted to see her. The past weeks that happened, Kara was hellbent on avoiding her like the plague. She drops by at CatCo but she doesn’t see Kara there and to her dismay, the blonde even volunteered to be shipped if necessary. Sure, she wanted to give Kara the space she needed, but she was still hoping to catch a glimpse. But since there was no hope in seeing her, that’s why she was in this place, making sure that she finishes what she came for.

Her phone notifies her that a message was received and she picks it up to see that it was Sam.

_911._

The message read and Lena got up from her bed and called Sam in a rush. The mere thought of her best friend being in trouble would definitely wake her up.

“Sam! What happened?” She says getting up as Sam answered the phone.

“Lena—thank god! I—I’m alright. It’s—we’re headed to the hospital.” Sam was obviously panting and she can hear Ruby’s faint voice from the background. “It’s Kara.” Was the last thing that she heard before she ran outside of her room and darted towards her car.

“Dear god, please… not _again_.” She said with tears rolling down her cheeks, totally ignoring the fact that she was just in her pajamas when she ran out. All her thoughts focused on the blonde that she hasn’t seen in a while.

Nothing more.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Her hands were hurting from all the punches that she was doing to her steering wheel. She could not believe that this was happening. It couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t fair. She just needed time. Or rather she was given time. But it was given to make her understand what she truly wants. Who she really wants to be with, not like this. Not like the last time. She did not spend time away from Kara just to find out that she was battling her heart out again. She did not take the time to fix things on her end just to lose her.

No. She can’t lose her. Not when she was ready. Not when she knew that she chose Kara. That she would always choose her. That it wasn’t a lost cause. That their love would make it work and that she was very much willing to move forward, no holds anymore.

“No. Kara, please…” She was crying so hard and she didn’t care if she got tickets for speeding or beating the red light. She just wanted to get to Kara. She repeated her words like a broken record, hoping and praying that the blonde will hear her. She felt like she was in her own cliché movie where the leading lady realized her feelings all too late and their lover has moved on already.

But in this movie, Kara hasn’t moved on. She was brought to the hospital fighting for her life. But deep down she hoped that her movie would work out just like how they always do. Where the lead always comes back, and they live happily ever after.

“Kara. Wait for me, darling…. Please.”

“Please, my love.” She whispered in the air.

Let it be known that all the tickets that were given to her that day was handled by her brother.

\----

“Sam!” It took her almost an hour and a half before she got to the hospital.

“Lena! Thank god, you’re here!” Sam rushed towards her and hugged her so tight that she was sure if she wasn’t focused on the fact that Kara was somewhere here, she would have reacted painfully. For now, she accepts the hug. She takes all of it. She needs it.

“Where’s Kara?” She asks.

“She’s inside. I saw her sister and I think her cardiologist was here too.” She felt Sam rubbing her back to calm her down. “They brought her inside.” Sam said she was almost crying. Sam was a strong person and never one to cry right away unless it was really bad or if she cares a lot for the person. Lena couldn’t decide, she really hopes that it was just because Sam cares a lot about Kara, not because it was bad.

But she braved herself and asked. “Was it bad?” She said lowly, her hands trembling and her eyes were watery. She just felt Sam hug her and cried with her. Feeling a faint nod confirming the thing that she was fearing to hear the most.

That Kara was in a bad shape. She separated herself from her friend and looked Sam in the eye. She was glad that Sam knew her because she didn’t know how to ask how bad it was. She can’t say the words. She was too scared to even say it out loud that Kara was in a bad state. Sam just shakes her head and gives her an answer.

“They almost weren’t able to revive her.” Sam said in sobs.

“Re—Revive? What do you mean revive? What happened to her?” She asked her best friend. The thought about Kara almost dying sent her to a very familiar place. A deep, dark, and lonely place. A place that she was successfully able to leave because Kara was around. If Kara was lost, she doesn’t know what would happen again.

“I’m sorry, Lena.” Sam hugged her trying to normalize her breath which she didn’t noticed she was struggling with, very much.

“No. Kara can’t leave me!” She said in between sobs. “I can’t—I won’t—Sam, No.” She hid her face in Sam’s neck trying to find the familiar calmness that only Kara can give her in this position. But nothing came. All she felt was despair. It wasn’t enough.

“They were able to revive her. Don’t worry. It was almost nothing, but Kara was a fighter. And she will fight. You know she will.” Sam assured her. She wasn’t sure if she was convinced, but that’ll do for now. At least one of them is hopeful. She needed all the hope that she can get.

“Do you know what happened?” Sam led her to the bench where they were isolated to other people.

“I really don’t know, but it was just this morning when we saw her collapse all of a sudden.”

“Just this morning? What do you mean?”

Sam wiped her tears as she regained herself. Lena knew that Sam needed time to compose herself. After all, she was the one who saw Kara in that state. “We saw her. Earlier today. I was about to drop Ruby to her team practice when she ran to the car again and told me that she saw Kara running around the field playing with the ball.”

“At first I have to admit that it was pretty cool to watch. I never imagined that I will see Kara bust her moves like that. She was very good with the drills, running, and the goals. It was hypnotizing to watch Kara.” Sam inhaled. “I was there watching her like the rest of the team was because their practice wasn’t due for about 30 minutes when I saw something that made me remember that she had a heart ailment.”

“I saw her, Lena.” Sam said trying to calm herself down. “She was all red. I can tell that she was exhausted. I feel so bad. Because I didn’t do anything to prevent it.”

“What do you mean?” Lena asked in curiosity.

“I knew that Kara was totally busting herself and I didn’t do anything to stop her. I figured because of the things that are happening between the two of you, I figured that maybe she really needs a distraction so I just let her be. I let her go and take all the articles she can get, send her to places as she requested and also allow her to take over times because I really thought that it’ll help her out. I didn’t—I didn’t know that it would lead to this. I’m so sorry, Lena.” She sobbed. Sam was blaming herself about what happened to Kara, and here Lena was thinking that it was entirely her fault.

“And earlier today, I can see it in her face that she was angry, and sad, and just so tired about all things and I didn’t do anything. I ran there a little too late to tell her to stop because one minute she was hitting the goal, then the other…” There was pause. “…she was laying there—down the—lifeless on the ground.”

“It was Ruby who ran first towards Kara and I didn’t realize that I was running too. I never ran that fast in my entire life.” Sam chuckled and Lena can’t help but give a pained smile at how her friend was trying to put levity into the situation. “It was so bad, Lena. I’m really sorry.”

Lena can’t help but hug her friend to assure her that it wasn’t the case.

“It wasn’t your fault, Sam. If there’s anyone to blame, it’ll be probably me. I hurt her and I don’t know what happened and why she resorted to all of this, but it was all because of me. I hurt her and I can never forgive myself if something bad happens to her.” She finishes with a broken sob trying to escape her throat.

“I can’t lose her. Not again. I don’t want to be left out again.” She said and she felt Sam’s hand circle her shoulders to give her comfort. “This is all my fault. Never blame yourself for trying to help her feel good because I fucked up. But Sam, I need Kara. I—I love her so much.” She said as tears escaped her face freely.

She felt Sam’s arms wrapped around her. Just the thought of losing Kara was making Lena want to lose her own life too. She can’t get through it if that happens. She knows so because after the time that they were apart, Lena realized that she has grown to love Kara entirely different from how she had loved Andrea. Andrea had taught her to love and to heal, but Kara? She gave Lena the chance to live again. Reminded her that love can heal everything. Love can make you feel alive, and she _very much_ likes to be alive again.

“I know you do, sweetheart. Let’s believe she’ll make it.” Sam whispers in her ears.

Hope.

That was something that Kara always gave her, and Sam was right. She needed to believe. Deep in her mind she ends up talking to whoever great being there might be that can save Kara. She wasn’t a religious person, but she needed to believe that there is one that can save her. She wasn’t so lucky last time. The news hit her life a brick wall when she was told that Andrea was gone, so her being in here physically and knowing that somehow Kara would still survive gave her that hope that maybe…

…just maybe everything will be fine. She may not be lucky last time, but maybe she still had a chance to fix this. To love Kara. They still had a chance.

“Come back to me.” She whispered to herself.

\---

“Lena?”

She searched for the almost familiar voice and to her surprise, it was Eliza. Lena steeled herself, getting herself ready for the slap and the anger that would come out of the woman who was walking towards her. She wished that Sam was here, but she sent her away so she can console Ruby too, who was equally sad as the rest of her team for seeing their coach faint in front of them. When Eliza was just a few steps away from her, she anticipated for hurtful words. To her surprise nothing came, but she was enveloped in a crushing hug that she was certain would knock air out of her lungs if she wasn’t too surprised with the reaction she received.

“Thank god, you’re here.” Was all that she heard. She didn’t know how she warranted that kind of affection in Eliza’s voice but she didn’t bring herself to accept it even if she needed it. She was too ashamed to welcome that gesture from Eliza so she politely separated herself from her and gave Eliza one last final squeeze.

“I’m so sorry, Eliza.” She said as tears started to make its way out of her eyes again. “This is all my fault.”

“Lena, honey. What are you talking about? I’m just glad that you’re here.” Eliza rubbed Lena’s shoulders which brought on more guilt on her part. This wasn’t fair. She was trying to apologize for what she had done to her daughter, but it seems like Eliza wasn’t going to let her do it.

“I did this to her.” And the tears had started to stream down her face. Warm fingers start to wipe them out and she snaps her eyes open to see Eliza smiling sadly at her.

“Lena, none of this is your fault.” The Danvers mother said softly. “I don’t know what happened, but I think as a mother a part of me does think I know. But I won’t ever blame you. Let’s just hope for the best, okay? Let’s stay strong for her.” Lena gave Eliza a faint nod and hugged her. It was something that she knew that they both badly needed.

They sat at the corner bench right next to the operating doors waiting for news about Kara. It was over about 3 hours since they had bought her in.

“I haven’t seen Alex yet.” Lena said. She wondered where she was. Sam mentioned that she was around but haven’t caught a glimpse of her yet.

“She’s doing her rounds and doesn’t want to be anywhere near here. That’s her way of coping with the incident.” She gave Eliza a curt nod and stared into the door once more. Hoping that they’d hear good news from the other side of it.

“I—I love her, you know.” She said fidgeting over her fingers. She doesn’t know why she said it. Maybe it was to make Eliza believe that despite the circumstance, she wanted her to know that she really loves Kara. And she regretted being the reason why her daughter was in there, fighting for her life.

“I think you should tell her that.” Eliza answered, looking at the windows outside. The sun was still high for sure but it really felt gloomy for Lena. Nothing was brighter than Kara’s smile. “I think hearing that from you will make her believe that… nothing is wrong or lacking about her.”

Lena paused and searched Eliza’s pained eyes. “She called me and asked me if something changed in her. If she wasn’t the same person as before. If after her surgery, if there was something there that wasn’t purely her that may have been acquired because of her heart.” Eliza squeezed Lena’s hand as a gesture to make her continue speaking. She might have felt Lena’s urge to protest. “I don’t know what happened between the two of you, but I think that part of the reason she asked that was because of how you felt for her. I know that you don’t think what way and you look at her as her own person, but she doesn’t know that. _Not yet_. She has always been her own person after everything that had happened to her. Growing up with a different family, starting over again, and moving on from the events that caused her more pain is the reason why Kara loves so much. Because she knows loss, and she’s been acquainted with it her whole life.”

“But having something that wasn’t hers to begin with is not something that she’s always handled so good. She always felt the need to prove that she doesn’t want to take that space that belonged to the original owner.” Eliza glanced over to her and smiled sadly. “I remember the first time she was at our home and how Alex had treated her. She made sure to make Alex feel that she wasn’t taking me and Jeremiah away from her. We weren’t hers to begin with so she was always careful around us. She was careful not to make Alex feel that she was filling in a space that was already there before. There were times before that she just wanted to go away from us and it took her long time to understand that it wasn’t the case. That she was part of our family and not someone who was only ever made to fill a gap.”

It all made perfect sense to her now. Of course. Kara had lost her family and she had found a new one with the Danvers’. She lost her heart and found a new one through Andrea, and it brought her to Lena. Ever since they started, Kara had been so adamant to protect her feelings and let her set the pace because she always says that she doesn’t want to make her feel like she’s rushing her. She understands that on a different level now. That all her life, Kara only wanted to be chosen. To belong. To have something or _someone_ prove her that she deserves those things too.

That she deserves her.

That Lena would love her.

“So never blame yourself, Lena. Most of the time, she will feel guilty for being the one filling the space of those who left. But I know that she’ll grow from it and that you’ll help her. You’ll help her become her own person and love her for who she really is. So yes, please. Tell her that you love her.” Eliza gave her one hug before they heard Alex come into the scene.

“Mom!” Alex said panting. She looked like she ran a marathon. When Alex stood straight, able to gain her composure, she was Lena and just gave her a curt nod.

“I thought you were doing your rounds?”

“I was, but I got a message from Nia one of Gayle’s interns telling me that I need to be here. I think they’re almost done.”

And just like that the doors of the operating room had opened and out came Gayle, whom Lena met at the wedding.

“Alex, Mrs. Danvers.” Gayle said acknowledging their presence as she took off her surgical cap to allow her more space on her face. “Lena.” It came out more as a shock than an acknowledgement, but she didn’t care. She needed to know how Kara was doing.

“How is my daughter?” Eliza got straight to the point.

“She’s all good. She’s actually doing very good. It took us quiet a long time to make it work but all her vital signs are showing as a good progress. Although she almost crashed but we were able to stop it. I believe that we were able to make good work at keeping her alive but the rest is up to her.” She said tiredly. “We needed to put her on an induced comma just to be sure that we’ll be able to monitor her and for her to get some real rest.”

“Where is she?” She found her voice and was aware that Alex was actually staring daggers behind her but she didn’t bring herself to care.

“We’ll be moving her up to the recovery room and we’ll look for a room to bring her in. We’re pretty full at the moment and I’m lucky that I had enough strings that I was able to pull to patch in a favor for Kara.”

“Thank you, Gayle.” Alex said as she hugged her friend. She saw the older Danvers’ relax her shoulders like she was really carrying a very heavy weight with her. She wished she can feel the same. Kara was still out on the weeds at least after the next 24 hours. Gayle excused herself as she gave Eliza a quick tap on the shoulder. The next thing she did was pull out her phone and made a very quick call to the head of the hospital. When she came back, Eliza was given time to see Kara in the recovery room before she gets moved to her room.

“Alex.” She says softly. “I’m sorry, I…”

“Save it Luthor.” Alex says coldly. _Ouch_. “I’m not mad at you. I want you to know that. But I am allowed to be upset about what happened today. I know you want to say sorry, it’s all over your face but don’t. It’s not your fault. This is very much Kara’s fault for pushing herself and allowed this to happen to her. But I am upset that it took you this long to realize what she is to you.”

“I kno—I—I’m sorry.”

“She told me everything and I don’t have it in me to be mad at you, but I have the right to be pissed of the situation. But you are welcome here. The fact you’re here means that she really means a lot to you and that’s enough for me. I’m sorry this happened, but let’s just be strong and be hopeful.”

“Thank you, Alex. I don’t know what I did to deserve this kind of goodness from you and Eliza but I won’t complain. I can’t live without her. She’s still here so I can fix it. Last time I didn’t which I find unfair, but now that I have the chance to, I’ll take it.”

“Thank you. That means a lot. We all love Kara, and as much as I want to be mad at you, I can’t because we’re in this together.” She felt Alex’s arms wrapped around her and this was the best sort of comfort that she had received all day. “We may be good about this with you, but I have to warn you.” She felt Alex chuckle. “Maggie is beyond piss.” She gulps.

\---

“Lena, you didn’t have to.” Eliza said as they entered the room where Kara was transferred after an hour of staying in the recovery room. “This is too much.”

“This is the least that I can do. After all, I want to make sure that Kara would be comfortable when she wakes up.” They were currently at one of the most expensive suites in the hospital that Lena had managed to get because of her Luthor name. Truth is that, when she called her mom and told her what happened, it was Lillian who managed to make it possible to Kara to be taken care of immediately. She was so glad to have her mother on her side.

“We appreciate the gesture.” Alex said. Lena for the life of her can feel that everything was good for the moment but she was scared to death to learn that Maggie was not happy about what happened between her and Kara. She was partly relieved that the Latina was not around and had been assigned to take a role that needed her to travel for a while. She can breathe. _For now._

“She seems settled and all her vitals are clear. Gayle will come back tomorrow to check on her. I need to do some rounds. You can go home for now mom and stay at my apartment.” Alex offered her mother.

“I just need to do a quick shower and I’ll be back.” Eliza agreed.

“No.” Lena said out of nowhere that had the two women look at her. “I mean, you can go and rest Eliza. I can watch over Kara tonight. I promise I won’t leave her side.”

“Are you sure?” She gave Eliza a tight nod and that was all it took to let the older woman to leave.

“I’ll check on you later, Lena. You need to rest too.” She gestured to her outfit. She almost forgot that she was still wearing her pajamas until this moment.

“I’ll have my assistant bring me some clothes. You can go ahead Alex.” She was left alone with Kara with only the sound of the machine monitoring her vital signs. The beeping sound making her relax because it is proof that Kara is alive and she was good. That she lived, she fought and now she’s here.

“Hi, my love.” She said as sat beside Kara’s bed. She was hesitant to touch her at first but chose to hold Kara’s hand and brush the hair on her face. She missed physical contact with Kara and to her lack of surprise, just the feeling of Kara under her palms had brought her a sense of calmness. Even in her state of unconsciousness and lack of knowledge on what was happening, Kara still made sure to make Lena feel good.

“I’m sorry.” She started and tears came crashing down her face. “I’m really sorry.” She said this lots of times today and she only hopes that Kara would hear her and forgive her. “I love you so much and I really wish that you can be awake to hear it from me. Come back to me, darling. Please. We have so much to do and I want to do them all with you. Live for me.” 

Alex enters Kara’s room that night and sees Lena slumped on the edge of the bed holding Kara’s hand while they both slept. It was already morning when Lena felt a hand on her shoulders. To her surprise, she squeaked and found Eliza smiling fondly at her. “I think it’s time for you to go home and take some rest, Lena. I can take it from here.”

She wanted to protest but she didn’t want to make Eliza feel that she needed permission to come and see her daughter.

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” She said as she stood up and gave Eliza a hug before she exits the room. Later that afternoon, she received a call from Alex saying that Kara was awake and was doing better. She was able to talk and found out that she needed to stay for at least a week more just to make sure that she’s all good to go. To her insistence, Eliza and Alex to have her take care of all the expenses throughout her entire stay in the hospital just so they can both focus on taking care of Kara. She knew that she wanted to go and see Kara right away but opted not to because she wasn’t sure if Kara was ready to see her and wanted to respect her time with her family. So, she tells Alex that she will drop by tomorrow.

It doesn’t help though because when the night came, she was so restless and wanted to run straight to Kara. She wanted to see those blue eyes that haunted her even in her sleep and kiss her so bad like her life depended on it. She really does, but she stood her ground and resolved to visit her tomorrow.

She doesn’t sleep well that night.

\---

She got the hospital later than she planned because the idea of Kara being awake and give her a look makes Lena want to go back to her apartment and cry. All the guilt and shame almost ate her up because as much as people reminded her that it wasn’t her fault, she still blamed herself. She was standing outside the door for about 5 minutes now and still doesn’t have the courage to just knock and be over with it. To her horror, the door actually opens and reveals Gayle together with her two interns Nia and Brainy tailing after her.

“Hey, Lena. You can come in you know?”

“Hi, Gayle.” She smiled awkwardly. “How she doing?” She asked just so she can calm herself down.

“She’s stable now. We’re still running some tests to make sure that the heart is working on a good shape. By then, we can discharge her based on how she would pass them. But definitely she’s off to a good start.” Lena can only sigh in relief as she heard this information. She glanced at the door and Gayle gave her a lite pat on the elbow. “Go inside. She needs the company.” She says and excuses herself together with Brainy and Nia, who was giving her a double thumbs up.

She steeled herself with enough courage to make her enter the room and not knock anymore. Willing herself to calm down, when she opened the door, she saw a train of blue eyes look at her with awe. Those eyes that she hasn’t seen in a while and made her feel like she has been seen once more, like the very first time that Kara laid eyes on her.

“Lena.”

Kara’s voice was low and soft. Obviously putting more effort into it because of the post-surgery recovery, but it was still the greatest sound that she had heard someone say her name. Even the way Andrea says her name was not close to how Kara says it. Like it was made to be said by her. She missed it so much.

“Kara. I—uhm—I wanted to see you and know you’re doing right now?” She said carefully approaching the end of Kara’s bed.

“I’m better, thank you.” She said with a smile. Despite the restrictions in her body, she still knows that Kara is giving her a genuine smile. One that translates to being happy that she was here. That was Kara’s smile for her.

“I wanted to say sorry.” She admitted in a small voice. “I did this to you.” She heard Kara chuckle and she gave Kara a quick glance wondering why she was chuckling.

“Lena. This isn’t your fault.” Kara said trying to sit properly. Lena still didn’t know if Kara would let her touch her for help, so she just went to Kara’s side to offer support if it was needed. Kara was polite enough not to brush her off and took the offered arm to settle herself in a more comfortable sitting position. “I did this to myself and I am the one to blame. I wasn’t being very careful enough and I had caused a lot of stress around here. Even Gayle is pissed at me.” She smiled and shook her head.

“But Kara…”

Kara held her hand up in a nice way. Not completely stopping Lena but just making her understand that it was okay. “I know we need to talk. I assume that’s why you’re here.” Kara asked.

“I guess I wanted us to talk, of course. The way we left things wasn’t good. I wanted to fix that. But right now, I’m more relieved to know that you’re safe and doing quiet well. I just want you to be strong Kara.” Tears ran down her face and this time, she was the one who broke the barrier that she created to not touch Kara. She needed to feel her make sure that she was real. That this was not a dream and that Kara was very much alive. “I thought I lost you.”

“I can’t lose you.” She said with a sob. She was not crying on Kara’s arms knees on the ground. Her face sunk the bed and she was certain that Kara was feeling the wetness coming from her eyes. “I don’t want to be in that position again. Please, darling. I know I fucked up, but please, I know it’s too much to ask but I beg you to please live. Live for me, for us, for the people around you.”

Kara took her face and brushed the tears from her face. Giving her a warm smile. “Seeing you here is enough proof that you care for me. I will. I want to live, for all the same reasons you have, but ultimately, I want to live for me too. I deserve that.” Lena gave her a quick nod and sank her face into Kara’s hands.

“I know there’s a lot that we need to talk about and I am willing to wait. Just recover fast and be strong. I can’t lose you, Kara. Not now. Now that I know that I…”

“Shhhh. You don’t have to say it now. It can wait. I’d rather us have this conversation when I’m much better. For now, I just want to rest. I’m not saying that I don’t want you here because you have every right after paying all my bills for me. It’s just that, everything is fresh. I’m still hurting, but I’m really happy to see you. I’ll be better. I promise. Then we’ll talk.” Kara assured her.

“I understand.” Lena nodded although she was hurting with the idea of giving Kara the space she needs, but she wasn’t a selfish person. “Promise me we’ll talk?”

Yep, not selfish but stubborn. She wants to have things her way. She’s a Luthor after all.

“I promise. I’ll call you. Okay?”

“Okay, Darling. Rest well. Call me if you need anything.” Kara gave her face a final squeeze and kissed her forehead. It was the first contact that she had received from Kara. That was enough for now. Just for now. She was willing to wait and was willing to fix this.

For them.

Because after all this.

She chooses to live.

She chooses Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being so patient with me you guys. I really appreciate it all!   
> So yeah, we're nearing the end and I hope that I still have your full support up to the very end.   
> Tell me what you think. <3


End file.
